jjgoldenpro

Hey girl Hold on tight and remember I'm always there for you to talk to. Just don't let go because at the end you'll have a very awesome thing to live with. (hopefully) I don't know everything about your relationship but I think you miss him alot. I know how you feel and I understand. Just hold on for a while and you'll be seeing him in Feb. Then you can decide if he's making you sad or if it's that you miss him which makes you sad JJgoldenpro (I'll tty soon)

his looks his farting his morning taste weird behaviour he lived far away his cheapness

I had a good laugh too. I would just delete her email and not reply. You don't owe her anything unless you feel guilty or something. Let her figure out what responsible mean. JJ

I've talked to a special needs teacher from college about this and her opinion is to tell him that it's not acceptable. but also tell him what is, so tell him, if he wants to visit he has to call 1 day before he comes. also that he needs to respect your provacy. you'll have to tell him how to do this to...like how you can't always be with him, you have a life and you need alone time. so, tell him it's not right, then tell him what would be okay and see if that helps I guess... From my point of view it sounds like an excellent plan! and don't get mad plz! just explain it firmly with some help from his parents if you can get it

Okay, thanks for your help on the email thing. I guess I can't expect much from that place then. Yes I have met this guy...that's how I started liking him. He was in canada for a holiday. We hit it off from the first minute. I do take extra courses and I have way to many hobbies. I usually am working on them but I still think about him at the same time. So I don't really wait around for him to call me. I would be alot worse then this then. Well I heard his grandma just passed away and he had to go to her funeral and that took a couple days. so I understand why he didn't talk then. and when he doesn't talk he tells me what's up if he was supposed to call. I've been thinking that maybe I should tell him I'm ready to have more with him now. I really wouldn't mind it.

Um, I learnt one thing you shouldn't do to guys is play games to figure out their feelings or complain. they don't like complaining and they don't think the same way as we do so they will eventually just say something we don't expect and we will take it differently then them. One way that might make him want to be with you more is stop worrying about how much YOU see him and how YOU feel about that but instead, when you see he's falling asleep, let him sleep... isn't it enough just to hold him while he sleeps sometimes? Guy's don't need to talk as much as girls...I only talk to my guy about once a week. he doesn't need more and I learnt how to live with less. Maybe try see this from his point of view, a guys view.

that sounds like a good Idea not to talk to you. It could be that you were chasing her to much, try to get her to contact you and that might work. so no contact for a week might make her want to contact you more. You will have to decide yourself wether you should go to the states in December but I don't know if it's the best. It might be easier to see how things for in the next few weeks first before you make a commitment to do that. JJ

We are not together yet no. I've been wanting to hold off on that because I broke up with my ex about 2 months ago only. I don't want to seem like I hop from guy to guy with no feelings about it. He told me he wants more but he's willing to wait. but yes, I tell myself alot that we are not a real couple yet and that helps alot. He did not say he was looking for space but I feel since he needs to keep up his marks for school and he has alot of hobbies and meetings etc that he doesn't need the distraction more then once in a while. One reason that we don't talk more is probably because he does not have service with his cell at his house. So he can only call me from the home phone and I can only call his home phone. we don't want our parents to freak out about that fact quite yet so I cannot call him very often. I write him emails about 3 or 4 times a week but I hardly ever get a reply from him so this also kinda says how he doesn't have much time. He told me that sometimes the days go so fast he just can't believe it's been so long since we talked. I know he has feelings for me but is it normal for a guy to not call so much? I've heard alot of girl complain about it before. I guess maybe I should be happy that he does call me instead of forgeting until I call him.

well, you really sound like my over controlling ex. first of all, he is lying because he wants to make you happy and if he doesn't lie you will try to change him. Don't suffocate him because it will hurt him in the long run. all guys watch porn at some point. you said he was 17 no? you can't expect him to be perfect to you. he is totally different obviously and don't try to change that! encourage him to be himself. delete that x3 watch thing now, if you don't trust him enough to let him be by himself then it's over already. you are not supposed to be his mother but his equal partner. how can he come to you with problems when you just try to change him because it. How can he trust you enough to tell you the truth. he needs to protect his Identity and make personal choices about what he wants...not do everything you want him too. I think you should leave him alone. let him be himself. don't worry about his porn for now. be great enough for him so he doens't need porn. You really sound EXACTLY like my ex and this hits me home more then any other post I've read. STOP ruining him and let him go! poor boy

I have to agree that this relationship does not sound very good. She is not being responsible by hanging around with matt when she knows that he likes her. I was in the same kind of situation as her once, I had a LDR and I had a guy which liked me living close by. I told my bf the same things she is telling you but I have to admit that the only reason I knew could get a hug was because he hugged me. and I said I was tempted but I didn't do anything when I really did hug back. In your other post you said that she was not sure if you were the one for you and that she wouldn't tie you down? (something along that line) I remember using the same lines myself because I was hoping my bf would dump me so I wouldn't be the guilty one and be stuck with all the * * * * of a break up. Then I could say "well he dumped me so why can't I do this?" I'm not saying she is doing any of the things I did but it sounds familiar. she does not sound as dedicated as you do. Maybe you should tell her what you are doing to her is this "lock down" thing and ask her if maybe she could take your thoughts into consideration as well. talk to her about not going out with matt anymore because you don't trust him maybe. Tell her you expect respect from her in order to give her the same respect back. the respect that a relationship should have as in always putting your partners feelings before another person. That's all I can think of for you to do but I hope it turns out.

I've been through a long distance relationship and I've just gotten out of it a short while ago. it was fine at the beginning and everything but then we started relying on each other to much and he started to become very controlling. I was relieved when it was over. I think this was from talking everyday, for about 2-3 hours a day. it was great sometimes when I had nothing else to do but It really became annoying when he would want to talk even when I was trying to sleep or wanted some alone time. Now I have met a guy that I am deeply interested in but there is one thing. He lives a 3 day driving distance away from me. This time we do not talk everyday. In fact we only talk about once a week or less. This can get very depressing at times when I feel that I have to tell him something or when I really need to know how he feels about something. I'm used to talking to a guy everyday and now it's very rare. I don't know how to adjust to that. Is there any thing I could do that might help? I don't mind that he is busy or is looking for some space but I need to get used to it and accept it. How can I do this without feeling like he's deserting me?

I really don't think you'll let them down by not giving them something to laugh about. If they know who you are they won't expect it. so be yourself. I had to laugh when pointed out that I wrote "It wasn't so bad" lol I see the humour there. I think the problem is you think about being funny to much. Usually when I think about "how could I be funny now?" I fail too. yea, the biggest thing is to have fun and you will get better...and get some alone time to do whatever would help. My old bf is living in Europe now and it seems that he is fine with himself now. I always encouraged him to try new things...like play guitar and stuff like that but only if he wanted to. This helped him loosen up and relax. He's fine now, still not funny but when I was talking to him I didn't want him to be funny, it was just great to have a guy to talk with that wouldn't try joke about everything. look @ your good side. because I'm sure you have one!

give him a chance I would meet him and give him a chance. i'm 17 and had the same thing with my ex. it turned out his looks weren't a big deal once we met. it was his character that broke us up and I really thought he was okay after I got used to him. I dunno. u are the only one who can really decide what to do

well, I think that I would be horrified to be in your position but I do see the guys point of view as I am going into working with children with autism and some with Aspergers Syndrome. To him you are all there is for him and he can only think about you. He doesn't have the reasoning skills that you do so the common logic you are trying to tell him probably will be denied by him and he will continue. It is best for him to move back to Australia and I can't believe how his parents allow him to move here. but then again, I don't know how his parents are. One thing, don't feed the fire. If he is obsessed with you then don't encourage it. Don't say, "I don't mind seeing you but I want you to move back" because all he will hear is " I don't mind seeing you" What he needs is another obsession to focus on. and maybe that can be brought around by you but I'm not sure. I don't know all the ins and outs of Aspergers Syndrome but it seems like it might work. try get him interested in something else. I don't know what else would make it easy for him. He would be prone to suicide if rejected by you totally. He does not act normally in the society and I understand your view. I can see why he might freak you out. someway you have to get him to move back but I don't know how... sorry, was this all a ramble?

#1 Islamophobia - Fear of Islam. #2 Catagelophobia, Katagelophobia - Fear of being ridiculed. #3 Claustrophobia - Fear of confined spaces. those are the top three actually I don't know if it's a phobia but those are the things I am most scared of. I don't get scared easily. JJ

I had a bf like you are for about 2 years and actually it wasn't so bad. The thing is that I'm very spontanius and I like to hear myself talk, I like to tell jokes and I like to live it up in life but I only need someone to listen. I don't mind if someone doesn't tell a joke back. It's all good. maybe you have to see that you might be a serious guy that isn't so in with what's going on lately but that doesn't have to be a problem. With the right person you could have fun! and about being a parent. you need time to yourself. when most guys were bumming around at age 18 you were a father and I'm sure you didn't get to be young much...now you might have a chance. life isn't all about work and getting all the material stuff that's needed. you got to feel good about yourself too. and you have to be able to relax once in a while. maybe a day or two to just do something for yourself would be good...who cares if it's watching movies or talking to yourself. as long as you enjoy it then you might see some fun! and when you have fun maybe you will dare to venture and see what else is up there. but it's not necessary. be who you wanna be and you will be happy. you don't have to be funny if it's not you. It's just fake then and it's no fun trying to talk to someone who's trying to be funny but his heart isn't in it. so, be yourself is about the best news I got. people who don't like you for who you are aren't worth being your friends. sorry, this is a bit of a ramble but I hope that it helps a bit. I understand what your going through because my ex bf talked the same way you do now.

I think he just isn't sure if you're into him or not. you could be sending him mixed signals without realizing it because you are unsure of the situation. that makes him unsure too. if you want him then flirt more openly with him. and I think the last post sounded positive. he'll pick it up some day...just try help him out a bit my being consistent as possible. JJ