shygirl79

Thank you for that affirmation Jeffery. I appreciate it. Its kind of weird being in this situation again. I was in LTR for a long time and now even a year out of that it seems sort of strange to be doing this all over again. There is another couple going along and that will be nice. There is also supposed to be a pre concert lecture that we are going to alone and will be good too I think. The other couple couldnt make it any earlier. Now I just face the ever daunting task of finding something to wear. I am excited though. Once I get past the nervous knots in my belly, I will be even better........ SG79

curious for your input ~ kind of long ~ Update -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Update on this situation: Well its been about a month and this past weekend, he got to me with the date and its this Sat. I am excited about it. It will be fun (I think) and educational (I am sure). Then there is this other weensy part of me that wants to vomit. Its not a date, or anything (at least it has not be advertised as such), but I still feel nervous. Is this normal? I hope so. If not then I will just have to deal with being abnormal lol.... Below is the OP. Thanks for all your input!!!!! Much love SG79 Quote: Ok so I have a situation and I am not quite sure what to make of it. I work at a college as a behind the scenes staff member. I am not in any sort of disciplinary position or in any sort of authority position over the students that attend here. I have been here about 5 years and 2 years ago a student came in (he was friends with one of my student workers) and we chit chatted for a bit, and I found him extremely interesting. He seemed to be a very active sort of person with a lot of interests and we have a nice time chit chatting. I have since seen him on and about campus and we have since had a few lengthy conversations and he seems like a nice person who is very diverse and eager about life. One night I was on upper campus in a parking lot and he passed by and I waved the next thing I know he is pulling into the lot and we chit chatted and I was on my way to lower campus (the opposite way he was going) and I was in high heels and it was Feb and gave me a ride to lower campus so I wouldn’t have to walk. That is just the sort of person he is. So a few weeks ago I bumped into him in the computer lab and we chatted for a bit, and he complimented me on my glasses which I thought was nice. We discussed the symphony (he is in band and such) as I was going to the symphony the next evening and he was all like yeah I should go sometime. I responded with yes you should, its an incredible experience. I know the times I went its been amazing. During this discourse there was a lot of eye contact, and our bodies were facing each other. Good signs I know. There even felt like there was some chemistry, but I know my radar tends to be off. That night he invited me to a dress rehearsal concert that was family only sort of event. He had written the opening piece for this performance. This actual opening night of this performance was a HUGE deal at our school and it a huge deal that he composed the opening piece. I planned to go, but circumstances prevented it. I did go to opening night though, and I saw him no big thing. A week or so later he comes into where I work and he “has a proposal for me”. He has 4 vouchers to go to the symphony and when he gets the dates for them wants me to check my calendar ~ presumably so we can attend together. Like the dork I am I was like "oh that’s so cool" yadda yadda, but did not give him my number so he could contact me with the dates. DUH! I have since given my digits. I guess what I am curious about is it just all seems fuzzy to me. I don’t get it, is this like a friend thing, or what is it, what is your opinion?? I also want to say that he is a 20ish purpose driven sort of person, and one of my friends has worked with him said about him that is an intentional sort of person. She however is biased and thinks he likes me. What I would like is an unbiased opinion and your input would be much appreciated. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Last edited by shygirl79 : Today at 04:38 PM. Reason: Update

Right on!!

bald or balding when its cut real close is hot, at least in my opinion

hmm that is an interesting point of view. I dont know if I could necessairly pull it off as I am excited to see anyone walk in our doors. But i could give it a shot.

so should i then act nearly disinterested, i.e. not smiling and waving or looking him in the eye when we see one another? I am new to this.....

sure that is one route or you could tell her that she seems like a terrific girl and you would like the opportunity to take to a movie or dinner to get to know her better.

That does sound like fun. If it were me, just be relaxed and honest with her. That is all you can do, put the ball in her court.

I never looked at is as "the chase". That seems like game playing to me and I dont like it, I wouldnt want it done to me, so I really dont want to do it to others. I dont mind the other stuff i.e. dirty laundry, mother issues, that doesnt bother me. The way I look at it we all have that and if someone can deal with mine (not that I have a TON of it) then I can deal with theirs. It will be interesting to see what happens though. He popped in two days ago to check some stuff out and granted he was with a good friend of his, but I thought it was a bit strange he didnt really say hi. I waved and such, but he barely even looked in my direction. Maybe he is just shy? But why get shy now? If he was grown enough before to ask me, saying hey should be a piece of cake right? This stuff makes my eyeballs cross i know i know.... stop overanalyzing..... i am trying, really...

I think that is a great idea, just dont leave her in the dark about how you feel. It will feel risky, but the payoff could be great. I have to leave for the night, but I will check back tomorrow if you want to discuss this more. Take care!!

But let her know for sure that you like her, dont let her go with just an idea. Maybe its time for her to date the "right" kind of guy. If I may ask, just so I can get a better idea, how old are ya'll?

Just be totally honest with her. Tell her that you like her and that you really wanted to kiss her that day, but didnt want to mess up your friendship with her brother. Tell her that she seems like a terrific girl and you would like the opportunity to take to a movie or dinner to get to know her better. That is my suggestion. Good luck!! SG79

I started when I was 13. In fact it was on my 13th birthday and I was in the dressing room at our local Wal-Mart. My mom always carried extra pads so it was fine, but what a gift, and of all the places to get it. However it did totally explain why I was bloated and grouchy the day before. SG79

It could be that your heart is still distracted by your ex. If it were me I would just be honest with the new man and tell him that while you think he is nice, you arent over your ex. Better to do it now than to let him get really attached to you. SG79

Good point. That is a good point and it was a few weeks after we had had that conversation. I think I forget sometimes that guys are wired differently than we are in that time and conversations and signals that often mean something to us, may not mean anything to them and vice versa. I am playing the devil's advocate in my head about this and when I think something negative I try to back it up with a positive, but then, when I have a positive I balance it with a negative. Basically I feel like I am driving myself nuts. LOL just kidding. To be honest I wish I could just forget about it, but I can't. Any other thoughts or tips on how not to analyze so much are very much welcomed!! SG79