Okay here's the deal. I've had this lady friend around for the past 4 months or so. She's a bit older than me (she's 30, I'm 21), but she and I are basically on the same level when it comes to maturity. 3 weeks ago she broke up with her boyfriend. Partly because he was angry and abusive, and partly because she had a crush on me. After their breakup I helped her move all of her things into her new place and ended up staying the night with her and, well, you know how the story goes. It was great, she's very passionate, cute, comfortable to lay around with, etc. We both have the same interests and enjoy doing alot of the same things. I really started to like her so I asked her if it would be alright to start referring to her as my girlfriend. She smiled and said yes.
Well I end up staying with her again the next night. I knew that she just got out of a relationship so I asked her if it was too much that I was spending the whole night with her. She said no, she wanted me to continue staying with her. So I did for about a week.
One night, she and I had a few friends over, things got a little noisy (lots of guitar and bagpipe playing) and her room mate (older guy towards his 40s, very bland and boring and hates company and noise) got pretty pissed and said it was time for some of us to leave. Well, she told me that I should go and that one of our friends is going to stay there because he couldn't get a ride home. Male friend by the way. I was a little confused by this but didn't say anything and just left. She told me to come back in the morning when I woke up.
The next morning, I get a phone call about my dad being on his death bed. I became a little depressed and wanted to go to her house so that she could keep my mind off of things (she's good at that, just by being there). Well I showed up and found her in bed with my friend.
I know that they didn't do anything because she was on her period at the time, so I didn't say anything. But when she came out in the living room to talk to me, she seemed like she didn't even care about my situation with my dad and told me to leave.
Well to make a long story short, she ends up sleeping with that guy (I found empty condom packs that weren't mine). I asked her what was going on and she told me that the two of us weren't ever dating to begin with, but we were just two friends having a good time with each other.
Now, I may have over reacted here but I was completely led on to believe that she and I were kinda exclusive, so I "argued" with her about it. She told me that I was taking it way too seriously but I don't feel I am. Generally I don't take kindly to people who lie to me and use me. And thats exactly how I feel. Like she just used me to help her after the breakup.
She tells me that she and the other guy are just friends too. And she wants me to stay the night with her again. I may have made a mistake by saying yes, but that's what happened. She told me she still has a crush on me but she's just playing the field and having fun. She also said she still wants to do things together because she wants to see if a relationship could happen between us. But, she spends more time with him than me, and the only time she ever calls me is when she needs a ride somewhere or some kind of favor or when the other guy is out of town once a week she asks me to sleep over.
I really had a thing for this girl so the jealousy is eating me alive. I don't know if I should still at least try to be friends with her or just stop all contact between us, because honestly, I don't think that I can even be friends with her anymore without feeling stressed out about the whole situation.
I'm proud of anyone who had the patience to read through all of that.
So, does anyone have any advice?