Where to start with this problem...First off I’ll give you a little bit of background...I’m 17 years old, and my girlfriend is 16. Some may call me young and naive, but I do love her, and I do intend on spending my life with her, after all its not that uncommon hearing about marrying high school "sweat hearts", but that’s besides the point...I’ve been with her about 7 months now... (I know what your thinking, im in for the long run)... the first 2 or three months went fairly good, she got along with my parents great, but her parents seemed a little distant, understandably so, it does take time to get to know someone. Well after about 4 or 5 months went by, my relationship with her parents was just like it was when we started going out, they wouldn’t take the time to get to know me, and any conversation ever started, was triggered by me and I would get a few words out of them if I was lucky. I was under the impression that they simply did not like me, I was just confused as to why not. First impressions are obviously everything, and I was polite and kind with lots of "please" and "thank you"s...they have known me from the church I go to because they also go there, and ive gone there my whole life, so right there should let them know im a decent kid in the 1st place, i mean i make honor roll in school, I intend on going to college, and last time i checked, there were no outstanding arrest warrents on my record...anyways, i was simply myself when i would go to her house, i wasnt fake, but just acted like the generally nice kid i am...they acted like the general they are........................
im going to give a little background story of when things really started to go down hill....: we were going out for about 4 months when this happened....for their summer vacation, they took a family trip to colorado for 2 weeks in a big 5th wheel pull behind camper... her parents promised her that we would have atleast an hour to talk per night (we were always polite and waited until the cell phone minutes were free and when everyone was getting ready for bed so we werent interrupting the vacation)....the one night while talking on the phone for about an hour and 5 minutes, her step dad comes screaming and telling her to get the of the phone and all that lovely stuff and they got into a big fight...i was raised in a family that taught me to always have respect for my elders, no matter how big of asses they are, so i called back to apologize to her step dad about the situation, which i thought was the right thing to do...the conversation when roughly like this....ME sorry about what just happened...HIM: i don’t want your damn apology, i don’t want anything from you, i don’t even want to talk to you, your ruining our family vacation....ME: well, im sorry for the incident, please try to enjoy the rest of your vacation, then he hung up on me. so i basically got kicked in the for being polite...so things didn’t start off too good, and he has never apologized for the incident since..................
back to the story... after a while i figured that they simply didn’t care for me for some reason or another, and i didn’t feel welcome at all when i would go to their house because they would act like i wasnt there, even when i tried to talk to them... so i simply stopped spending time with my girlfriend at her house, and she would just come to mine. everything was great for about 2 weeks, no problems, we were happy, and then, out of the blue, her family starts complaining because i don’t go over to their house, and they cant get a chance to know me...so , i bit my lip, and decided i would start going back to their house and slip the time spend 50/50... i was still very kind and polite...the exact same thing happened when i started to go back to visit, i was like the invisible person, they would walk by and not even look at me...
so i decided that the way things were going wasnt good because my g/f would always get into fights with her parents about this, and i really did want to have a good relationship with them, so i decided that i would talk with them and try to work things out so i gathered her parents together and started to talk with them...within the first 5 words her step dad interrupted me and stated that he was going to say what he had to say first...and the outcome of the whole conversation was that "things are like they are because of me, but they were willing to give me another chance"... or so her step dad stated...and of course, there was no change in the relationship on their part...
so at the point we are at now, her mother will constantly make up other plans at the last minute so we cannot see each other on the day planned a week in advance...such as a camping trip for our six month anniversary, or a trip into town that she has to go along with her. My girlfriend has asked her parents if they have any problem with me, and they claim they don’t, and her mother will even admit that she’s just playing mind games with out relationship and that she needs to stop, but then she’s back to her manipulative ways.....
right now things are to the point where it is hard for us to enjoy ourselves when we are together because we are always worried about what is going to be said when she goes home, and what her mother is going to fight with her about the next time she sees her..... I stand up for what i believe in, and i will not lose my girlfriend to her parent’s malice. I’m simply tired of trying to make things better and then getting shot down time after time. Like I said, I stand up for what I believe in, but if I do in this matter, then things will only get worse, so I just keep quiet and its really starting to take the toll on me because it seems like everyday I’m stressed out with the situation. I will not let her parents rip us apart, but I can’t deal with the way things are now. I need things to get better because it’s starting to cause problems with our own relationship…if anyone has any advice for me in this situation, I would greatly appreciate it…. thank you…