Nameless006

With my break up, she always hung out with other guys, and she never used to, and I knew it would jsut lead to messing around at one point. We argued about it a lot, and she told me that I'm overreacting, and wanted space, so we went on a "breaK" the first day of the break, one of these guys kissed her, and they got together pretty much, I didn't know this, about 4 days into the break, she wanted back with me, I knew this guy was her friend, but she told me was mad at him, for other things, I never thought she was mad at him cause they were a couple. Then we were fine for a week, and then he came back into the picture, she didn't leave me for him, but I was still very uncomfortable with him (not knowing they had done anything). All the talk about him led to arguing, which lead to a break up. She IMMEDIATELY started seeing him again. The break up was EXTREMELY hard on me and I told her that after about 4 days, and I said at least you have him to fill the void, and she's like he's jsut something to do, and I'm like you don't see it continuing? and she's like no. And I'm like, then why do you hang out with him or kiss him if you don't like him (cause she's not like that at all) she said that she regrets it all, and it "too * * * *ed up, from her previous relationships, and wishes I had met her before her ex boyfriends did" She was cheated on by both her last boyfriends. She told me that she wants me back, I want her back more than anything, but after I was replaced so fast. Nobody wants their love kissing another man, I feel like she cheated on me, she says stuff like "well we were on break" but I know that's just a stupid excuse, cause before the break, she's like, this isn't a reason to see other people, I just need time to catch up on school work. I don't want to just yell at her and make her feel guilty, but it kills me inside, I know that if I ever cheated on her, or did something on that break, and she didn't, she would be CRUSHED. I treat her so well, that she almost doesn't know what it's like to be hurt by me. And if I did, I would CONSTANTLY be making it up to her. I feel like she doesn't and never will take it as seriously as I do, unless I do it to her, which is just stupid revenge. It's a lot harder to know that I was uncomfortable with this guy from day 1, yet she have the nerve to argue back with me. In the end I was right, and now she's making up excuses, it seems like she doesn't want to amount to the pain she's causing me, but still wants me back more than anything. Sorry this was long, but I want her back too, but it's different now that she's been with that other guy, I mean all they did was kiss (not just once) which I keep telling myself, it's not like they had sex, but still, I could never be as happy with her after this guy, as I was with her before the guy, cause it's not like it's a past relationship, it was DURING our current relationship, and since she had no feelings for him, it was SOOOOO unnecessary. I just don't know whether to take her back or not. I want her back, but it's not as easy to let the situation go, if she's not really sorry about it, she regrets it, but only if I ask her. And the more I bring it up, the more I feel like I'm annoying her.

thank you all very much, ya, we broke up about two days ago, the night we broke up, I spent sitting alone, and she spent with some guy, she hung out with him the next day, and is hanging out with him right now, it's easily going to be her next boyfriend, she said she still wants to be friends, and I said I don't want that, so we're done talking. I'm sorry I only saw what you all said today, and not earlier, thanks though, it looks like I made the right decision in the end.

as a guy, I know that I'd prefer my girl not to be the town bicycle, It's more special when there's less. I'm not into casual sex, but I know if I was, if I was just looking for a "booty call" I'd want a more experienced girl, or if I was just in a relationship for sex and sex only, I'd want experience, but if I'm looking for love, I would want that person to have had a lot less experience. Since I'm not into casual sex, nor am I a sex freak, I prefer my women to have less experience. Everyone can learn, every single person remembers their first. Sometimes those learning moments are a lot more special in the end than a random night of pleasure.

My relationship is in shambles pretty much, basically all you need to know, is my girlfriend does things that hurt me a lot, and claims she has no time to talk to me about them. Since this isn't the breaking up board, I summed it up, I'm sure you can figure out my situation if you do a search under my name. either way. I'm "hidden" shy, most people know me as a funny guy, who can talk his way out and into anything. But if I like a girl, I'll never, talk to them, I'm so shy about love it's disgusting, I've come to accept it, and it was hard enough getting the girlfriend I already have. So my situation is this, my girlfriend has told me it's over once or twice, but always comes running back to me the next day, telling me that things are different, then 5 minutes later I find out it was a lie. I want to end the realtionship, but I still love her very much, she recently started college, and now hangs out with 1 million guys, that would ask her out the second I left her. Before college our relationship was a dream, it was everything I ever wanted, and now she's changed so much. I've tried to end the relationship, but then the guys just flock to her, and I end up apologizing and we get back together. Basically, if I end it, she'll replace me in a second, and I'm WAAAAY to shy, it may be years before I ever find a girl again, especially one that was as good as she used to be. But I'm also scared she might change back after the initial stress of school is over, and I'll have missed my chance forever. Girls hate to admit it, but they're suckers for vultures (guys who use a girl's sadness to get into their pants) My girlfriend says she hates when girls do that, but whenever I tell her how she's treating me, she gets upset and ignores me, then goes and hangs out with other guys. I want to end my own pain, but I don't want to lose the girl I fell in love with forever, I'm hoping she'll become what she used to be, and realize that if our roles were reversed she'd be as upset, if not more upset, than I am. But with my shyness, being replaced will make it even harder for me to find a girl. if I try to just leave her alone to reflect on what she did to me, she'll go hang out with her guy friends, and I'll feel even worse than I did. So now I just try to hold in all my problems as to not upset her. All I can do now is hope she changes by herself. The worst part is, I know her so well, that if I broke up with her, she'd be with one of these guys, but she'll come running back to me in the end. But I won't want her back after the guy's had her. But it seems like that's the only way she'll realize what I mean to her. So should I just quit now, and have no contact with her? Break up with her let vultures have their way with her and have her come running back to me? Or sit through the ride to see if it ends?

The serious talk thing doesn't work in this situation, I was only on this site because of the situation I'm in, and I found this post, where it's almost like a mirror image. Basically for me, she does things that upset me, and when I confront her about them, she says that she's too busy with school, and that we'll talk later, of course we never ever bring it up again, and the more I try, to more she acts like I'm victimizing her, and just blows up in my face. There's this one guy she knows I don't like her hanging aroudn with, she's the same with me and a lot of women, but since it's a mutual feeling there was never any problems with it. But either way, she had him come over recently, and refused to tell me what she was doing, when I asked why she couldn't talk, she just said "I'm busy", eventually "I'm busy" became "I'm just talking to someone, I'll only be a minute" after two hours, she finally told me that, that guy was over which, I know isn't cheating, her roommate and her other friend were there too, but she knows how much I don't like that guy, and she knows if the roles were reversed, she'd be even more upset with me. Either way, back to the original point, I asked how she could do that do me? and she said that she's really tired, and has to go to bed, cause she has class early tomorrow. And I'm like can you just answer me, and she's like no we'll talk about it tomorrow, so I just bit my tongue and said ok. The next day she I woke up and asked her about it again, she said she's busy studying and doesn't want to talk about it right now. I said when can you talk about it? and she said "Not now, I have to go to class, and thanks to you I didn't get to do my homework". THAT really upset me, because she spent 2 hours with that guy last night, 5 minutes with me last night, and 2 minutes with me that morning, and she's making it seem like it's my fault. the next day, I tried telling her, what she said, and how it made me feel, and she just said "why do't you just drop this already, it was 3 days ago, I've got studying to do, I don't have time to argue with you". It just seems like they feel no guilt for anything they do, because they have school as an excuse for anything they say or do to you. I'm currently still in this situation, and I don't know how to get out of it, if I leave her alone, she'll continue on as if nothing happened, and if I make her mad, she'll just avoid me. I literally cannot plead any case against her, cause then she turns it around on how I'm taking up her time. Yet she still goes out all the time? given this isn't the same exact situation, but the replacement of guilt with the excuse of school, is the same. For the record, before college she wasn't like this at all and we've been dating well over a year now.