tkrob

I am meeting a friend at the airport today. He has no idea that I am going to be there. I want to give him something funny and cute...does anyone have any ideas of something I can give him?

Your advice was really good. I haven't spoken or "visited" him in a week. I thought it would be hard...but I honestly think that I am finally tired of his BS. You know?? I have already went on two dates since I broke it off with him. And, I really enjoyed myself. The sky is finally looking blue again!!!! Thanks for the advice. Hopefully, I can keep it up!

Over the summer, I broke up with my boyfriend of four years. I was ready for a committment and he wasn't willing to make the move. With him being 13 years older than me, I figured that he should be able to make up his mind. But, instead, he never did. It was always, "I love you, but I have things that I need to work through first." Anyway, I have had a very hard time moving on....and I wish it wasn't like that. I wish that I could just wake up and be over him! Just like that!! But, it hasn't been that easy at all. I have had a very hard time NOT talking to him via phone or email. And, we have had "visiting" times..if you know what I mean. But, I decided that this has to stop because it is hurting me more than helping me. I am continuing the heartache instead of moving on. So, the only way, that I could think that would MAKE me stop talking to him is to just tell him that I was interested in someone else and that I thought we should stop talking. I hated lying to him because it is just WRONG! But, I had to do something to help ME out! Otherwise, it would be another four years of the same. I feel really guilty though about this. I do want to start meeting other people. And, I know there will be no chance for any of them as long as we are still talking...and that is another reason that I told him that. I have to move on!!!!! I wish someone could tell me that I did the right thing....and that everything will work out..one way or the other...I am just starting to panic..wondering if I really screwed up!! Help me, my friends!!

Ha! If she thinks getting married will make things all better...she is crazy! If she is acting like that now....imagine your life with her forever! Not worth it! Too many more fish in the sea, to put up with that! I know it is hard...but this relationship is bad news!!!

I personally like dating older men..because of the security they provide. I feel safe with them. They have been through alot in life and are much wiser (for the most part). They understand more about life than I do. Also, I am not much of a partier and I find that men my age are. That's all they want to do. So, dating older men is right up my ally. I much prefer to stay home and watch a good movie to going out. So, men 10 years older than me are okay.

You know I have heard this before.....I'll have to think about that one!

I know exactly how you feel! But, remember this will pass! You made the right choice to cut him off...I am going through this myself..and it IS really hard. But, don't go back to that. I remember one time after a past relationship ended, I wanted something to make me feel better. One of my friends told me something, that helped me out so much. She said, "You'll just have to cry until you don't cry anymore! One day you will wake up and you won't be crying anymore. And, then you'll know that you did it!!! You let yourself heal!" I hope this helps you too! Spend time with your girlfriends, too! They will help you!!

I just need some objective advice. I have been dating this man for four years now. Actually, we dated for one year and spent the last three years being friends with benefits. He would tell me that we were not dating. However, we did everything together..from family events, to workplace events, etc. Everyone considered us dating all this time and we truly were! But, he just couldn't handle the whole "dating" label. Stupid, huh? I guess it is even more stupid that I would put up with that! I recently turned 29 and I really wanted to get a committment from him...but that didn't happen. So, I told him that we needed to stop doing whatever we were doing if it wasn't going anywhere. He said that he understoo because I deserved to have the best. He told me that he loved me but that he had of issues still from his previous divorce. He has been divorced now for almost 6 years and he just can't seem to shake it. He says that I don't understand because I have never been through it. But, he was married to his high school sweetheart and when she up and left him after 14 years and 2 kids...he was devastated! And, he just doesn't want to go through that again. I understand that fear. But, I can't sit around hoping that he realizes how much he wants to be with me. Can I? I don't want to wake up one day and 10 years have passed and I still don't have the committment. That would really suck! So, anyway, this summer we broke up and just recently started talking again. But, I can't do it! We are such good friends...and get along so well. But, that just kills me. I want to be with him and his boys! I don't want to hear about all the things going on in their lives. I want to experience it with them! I'm having a hard time making sense of it all. I love them..but right now, I want to have a "real" family....not a pretend one where no one has made a comittment. You know what I mean?? It is a hard situation...I just hope that it will turn out for the best....

I personally feel that you are over-reacting. The past is the past! And, your friend had no right to be giving you this information. What did she think it would help? Did she think it would help your relationship with your fiance? But, that's beside the point and can't be changed now! I have always found that the what I don't know about my boyfriend's past won't kill me. We as women tend to let things like that bother us..and then men can't recover because we just don't let it go! I would suggest that you sit down and think about this man and your relationship. Do you love him? Does he treat you well? Is he truly a good man NOW? Has he ever given you a real reason to not love him or trust him? If you find that this is the man that you love and want to be with, then you have to take the bad with the good. The greatest gift you can give him is your understanding and forgiveness...and the willingness to help him be a better person now and in the future. And, in the future, don't ask about the past...you can't change it anyway! Only look ahead!!! Good Luck!