MR C

My daughter did the same, it just feels weird to them! Ive found since becoming a parent youve just got to persevere and it stops like the colic, sleepless nights etc etc

Just to say after yesterdays appreciated views and advice, and after having slept on it, feeling better and more confident about beating this. Amazing how some outside views and opinions made me start to break away for the 'routine' and habit ive giot myself into. Ive decided im not going to tell my wife about it, yes partly cos im scared to, cos it will surely split us up, but i just want to move past it all forget it and move on and be happy. Although this may sound shallow to you but im also looking forward to having more money as this was starting to eat up my income! were moving home at the moment and this must signal for me a new start, a clean slate as they say. It may be a slightly cowardly step im taking but ive lost too many years of happiness in my life to these sex issues, im not losing my wife too.

WOHA now that was a loaded thread, thanks. What do you think about sins though, ive sinned (infidelity) thats the reason why i joined this site yesterday for some guidance and help etc, Do you think ill go to hell for what ive done? Ive wanted to talk to a priest about this for a long time but havent, im sure its not as clear cut as yes or no but im trying to make things better, and im generally a good person compassionate etc etc.

This is an age old question that will amybe never be answered definitively, but what are your views on religion, its sooooo confusing. I dont go to church, did as a kid and my parents go etc etc, as we were brought up in a little working class village and the chursh being like a cebtral focus of the community etc, but now i dont go to church other than weddings funerals christenings. But i feel a real love for god, i pray to him at home regularly and talk to 'him' like a friend (I know i sound nuts!), but i find it very comforting, i believe we go somewhere when we die, and i beelive in the forces of good and evil. I also think that ll religions be it christianity, muslim, hinuism, etc etc are all real theyre all just different cultures interpretaions of the same thing. But why does religion cause so muich pain so much death, so much suffering, almost every war etc, was/is based on religious issues. Tragically ironic.

Thanks to everyone, i feel like ive found anew set of friends or something, gott ago now but ill be back, your * * * *ing amazing people, all of you.

Yes it is and i appreciate what you sdaid thanks man. Youre right too about the bruitsh perception of things etc , im british too you see.

What ive always found starnge is that on the occasions where i gone out with my friends (ie not with my wife) ive had many opportunities for affairs but havent done it, and i can resist that temptaition and thats the starnge thing. Earlier this year me and my friend went to watch Oasis in concert and stayed over in a hotel we met up with some people and a girls id never met before was all over me and wanted me to go bacjk to her room with her, im not going to say i wasnt really really tempted cos i was but i didnt, then ~i go and do this, and in all honesty the sleaziness etc of parlours does niot turn me on, its the closeness and the passion and the connection sexually that I crave and parlours doesnt give this to me.

YOu say you were abused when you were younger, was it sexual abuse? This may have alot to do with it. Yes my babysitter i was about 6 or 7.

i deal with addiction in my husband, and he is just like you in that he cries, hates himself, etc. afterward, but then later there are triggers that stress him out and make him go back to the behavior Wow that it,. thats exactkly what happens with me, whne things go well in my life I dont go to the parlours but if something bad happens, It how i cope with the pain, it amazing you say that. Somehting bad happened last month and i went to a aprlour as i drove there i rememebr thinking I dont want to do this, its dirty its wrong, and i wasnt even horny! but i couldnt stop, I even felt like crying as i had sex with the girl, It was awful.

Yeah of course your right, ive thought of that a million times, but were just really good together in every other way, ive often thought of setting her free so to speak, its the least i could do. Its crazy but ive never spoken to anyone about this ever, and now after finding this site and two people telling me it like it is, makes fee think what an idiot, pull it together man! Right now i feel like ill never go again, this is a strange feeling. Sex has always had like a stigma for me, to be honest i was abused when younger and i never told anyone about that ( * * * *!!!!!! the floodgates are opening now!), ., erm but ive never really blamed that , oh i dont know. My life has always had some sex related drama or something that has to be bigger than the rest of life issues but maybe now its time to change. * * * * it, i dont know i justed wanted a rant and to talk, thanks for your replys your all top people.

Can anyone help me with some words of advice? I always lead a sheltered life as regards sex as i was very very shy in my teens and early 20's, when i was 20 a friend introduced me to massage parlours which like most red blooded 20 years olds i though 'this is great' Bascially 12 years later i still go to them. My sex life is quite boring with my wife whom i love dearly, but i cant stop going to the parlours, the sex is walways protected, and recent tests have shown me clear of sti's but the guilt is tearing me apart, I hate myself. Im a slave to my sex drive and I feel totally out of control. I go to a aprlour probabaly 3 times a month and i cry every time after, yet I still go and go again, ijust dont know what to do.