Darb

I am the one who posted this and I wanna thank everyone for their advice on it all. I am feeling very lost right now and feel so alone over this. I was pacing back and forth last night in my house with my phone in my hand and I gave in and called her, I just couldnt stop myself fro doing it, we talked for a long time and she said she doesnt wanna serious relationship and doesnt wanna be tied down but she still wants to talk to me which i dont understand at all. She said she has never cheated on me and swears to it but it is probably all lies we talked for a while and she said she would call me today after she got off work but she never did. I drove by her house tonight....... I know sounds like a stalker but I am really not and I just miss her alot and I cant help it, she was home and I just drove off. I called her when I got home..... I know I am stupid but I cant help it, she never answered when I called but I left a message telling her to give me a call I am trying to get over this but right now I am still a mess and I just feel so lost and lonely but I have finally commited to not calling her ever again and I am gonna stick to it...... I just really cared alot about her and miss her a great deal.....and I know I shouldnt care at all becuase of the way she treated me but I cant help it. I got a very strange phone call last night at about 2am, it said private call on my cell phone which normally that is what I always get when she calls me but I am on call for my job and it shows up as private occasionally so I answered it, there was someone on the other line but they wouldnt say a word, but they would make weird growling noises and then just sit there and not say a word....this went on for several minutes with me yelling at them and I finally hung up the phone, It was very spooky and weird. Im just trying to find strength to just forget about this but right now it is very hard for me to do.

I just do not understand why people lie like this and cheat...... it will all come out in the end why not just be honest. I really cared for this woman and treated her good and for her to lie right to my face and pretty much beg me to leave her house so I wouldnt be there when some guy came over blows my mind! I have spent alot of time with her and really have got attached to her and to be treated like this really destroys me..... I really wish I would have never met her.

by prospect I mean......future boyfriend I have never been treated this way in my entire life and the more I think of it the more upset and pissed I get, this woman is 36 years old! and she had the nerve to call me immature when we were talkin on the phone and said I was very possesive which I am not....she is trying to put the blame on me it seems. I just cant believe she would lie right to my face and push me out the door so I wouldnt be there when some guy shows up.....and we just had sex like 30 minutes before hand! I know I shouldnt think this way...but i want revenge! I wanna get her over my house and have sex with her and right after open my door and tell her to get out and say "you are off the prospect list" I know I wont do this because I am a good person and I do have morals...but I really cared for this woman and she crushed me. I called her a couple times after all this happened and told her my feelings and that i really care about her and tried to talk to her about this, alot of times I would ask her a question and she wouldnt even answer me she would just sit there or her answer would be "I DONT KNOW". I guess I can never speak to her again...its just crazy this happens out of nowhere like this, i just cannot believe someone would do that to someone right in front of them..........and then lie right to my face

I went over my girlfriends house the other night and we hung out and watched a movie and shot some pool....all was well, I stayed all night there and in the morning we got up and we had sex. I had to work that day but didnt have to go in till a little later....I am normally gone very early in the morning but not this day. I am out with her in the kitchen about an hour later and her phone rings....she said hmmmm it says some kind of storage place on my caller ID and she answers it. It was a guy on the other end talking to her and I could hear the whole conversation because the phone was on so loud! he asked her is she wanted to go out to breakfast and they had small talk and he asked if he can stop over on his way to work.......and she said YES while I was standing right there! I could not believe this was happeneing while I was right there! I asked who that was.....and she said it was her SISTER! and she was askin her if she wanted to go out to eat. I called her out on this and said what the hell are you talkin about that was a guy on the phone and said I heard the whole conversation, well she said I was crazy and that it was her sister. I sat down at the table then all the sudden she said "well I am gonna take a shower and go to the store are you leaving for work now"? I knew some guy was coming over and I said no I am gonna hang out a while because I do not have to work yet.....she starts getting very nervous and was pretty much pushing me out the door and practically begging me to leave....... so I did I get in my car and back out of the driveway and take off and I pass a white truck with some guy in it on the way and I just knew that was the guy going to her house.....I circled around just to make sure and sure enough he pulled in her driveway and got out. I couldnt believe this was happening, I have only been with her for about 4 months but this was just crazy! I immediately called her up when I seen the truck and asked her what the hell was going on...she said she would call me back in an hour. We talked about the whole thing for a long time and the best answer I got from her about this guy is that he is a "PROSPECT" and now all the sudden she doesnt wanna be tied down and doesnt want a serious relationship, supposedly nothing has happened with this guy yet.....so she says. I am very tore up about this and I cant stop thinking about it, she says she still wants to see me but she just doesnt wanna have a serious relationship and she wants to take it day by day......whatever that means. I told her I wanna be with her but I want her to only be with me....and she said NO. This woman has told me she loved me and we have spent a ton of time together.....I just feel so lost.

thanks for the good words.....yea its not like it happens all the time but when it has.......she gets very upset and says some real mean stuff! I will talk about it with her for sure

no i wasnt drinking alcohol.....no she is very nice and sweet outside the bedroom normally...we have had some problems but nothing too major. She just made me feel like crap last night, I did start the whole making out deal and wanted to have sex but I just couldnt get an erection, later that night she told me to take care of her with my hand and while I was doing that I got an erection and she gave me oral sex......and after i got off she got mad again and said i just wanted oral sex all the time, and thats the only thing that excites me! and I couldnt get her off last night! ohhhhh and she will not let me give her oral sex for some reason, I did once for like 5 minutes but she kinda pulled me up and didnt want anymore, and I LOVE to do it. Just thinking about it makes it worse it seems

I am a 29 year old male and I was at my girlfriends house last night and we were fooling around and I could not get an erection! I got one for a little while but when I put the condom on and it was time to go........ it went bye-bye. I will admit this has happened a couple times before but usually I have no problem..... this really worries her and she always questions herself and me when this happens and she does get mad over it! I am very attracted to her and when we have sex it usually lasts at least 20-30 minutes or longer, but she even questions that wondering why it takes me so long and I tell her i try and control myself so I dont cum to early. I always get off when we do have sex but she doesnt....sometimes she does sometimes she doesnt...but she says it is hard for her to "get off" and one time she told me she has to imagine things and concentrate to have an orgasm, I asked her what she imagined and she said she imagined having sex at other places and different situations with me while we are having sex. I will admit I masterbate quite a bit so Im sure that doesnt help the problem but my erection problem has only happened 2-3 times in 3 months but when it does it causes alot of stress. She really hurts my feelings when this happens by some of the stuff she has said and makes me feel worthless! here are some things she has said I must not be attracted to her I must have another woman besides her I am only 29 her ex husband was 35 and he could have sex with her 5 times a day! I heard this last night she talked about gettin me some viagra she asked if I was GAY! which is just crazy! this has only happened mabye 3 times in 3 months and we have probably had sex 20 times the past 3 months mabye my sex drive is going down? I love having sex with her but when this happnes it totally turns me off and kinda depresses me! any advice?

God I feel so horrible...I just wish I knew the whole truth! I have asked her straight up "If you do not want to be with me please just tell me" but she always says she does......I have spent so much time with her and we have had some good times I just dont want it to end if I am just being paranoid and I know she has some problems but she is trying to change.

I feel I should get out but I just cant! i really have strong feelings for her and she really doesnt go out hardly at all...this I know...but when she does it is not good

she is normally very sweet and I know she is a good person, mabye I am overreacting......she did tell me she loved me when I put her into bed and she has never said that, i just dont know if this guy is harmless or there is something going on

I have been with a woman for 3 months now and I recently have been going through some rough times with her and i am not sure what to do. I really like her and care about her alot and I have told her this but lately things have just been very crazy! my birthday was last week and it turned out to be a terrible day! I was over her house the night before and I spent the night and she asked me in the morning before she left for work If I would like to go out to dinner for my birthday.... I said I would love to and It felt very good that she asked me and wanted to be with me. I got a call from her at work but she seemed distant and she never really asked me to go out to dinner or do anything, I asked her If I could meet her somewhere but she never really answered me? she said well I guess I am gonna go amuse myself after work...after a weird conversaton I said well give me a call later, keep in mind this was my birthday. I am sitting at home and I get a phone call later that night from my friend and he says she is sitting at the local bar drinking with some guy! I know the guy she was with and I think they went out on one date and she said she didnt really like him but he called her alot and she never really talked to him any but she said he is just lonely and pathetic and she felt sorry for him. I was very upset and said I had to go becuase I didnt feel like talkin to him about this. I called him back about an hour or so later and he said the guy left and she was sitting at the bar by herself. I left it at that and went out to dinner with a couple friends. I called her the next day and brought up the whole situation and she kinda put the blame on me saying when she called me before she left work I didnt seem to interested in seeing her and she said she was going out to "amuse" herself. I told her she really hurt my feelings and she could have asked me to join her after all it was my birthday and the day before she asked me If I wanted to go out to dinner with her, I wasnt about to ask her on the phone if she would take me out for my birthday! I felt that should be left to her. We went out the next night to dinner and we talked about what happened and it turned out she got really drunk and some guy she didnt know gave her a ride home! supposedly nothing happened and it was just a ride home..I expressed my concern about her going to a bar by herself and getting drunk and getting in a car with a stranger which I think is completely crazy! and this was a different guy then the one she was with earlier. I was willing to look past this and forget about it, people make mistakes I say to myself. I got off work early last friday, I am normally gone every other day for my job and I shouldnt have been home until saturday but I didnt leave and go out of town. I am driving home and I deceided to drive by the bar cause I had a feeling she was there and there she was. I walked in and walked over to her and sat down and she was happy to see me, she was there with a friend and we all talked for a while and had a few beers, everything was OK she gets a phone call at the bar, which is very weird if you ask me, she is gone for a few minutes and comes back and says it was her mother and she was just checkin on her. Then the one guy comes in who she says is pathetic and lonely and he sits right next to me!! he knows we are dating but he doesnt say anything to me, everytime I got up and went to the bathroom I would come back and he would be talking to her....which really pissed me off! now this guy has called her several times even while I was over her house but she would never answer and she said he is just crazy, but he always went away when I came back in the picture. Well that night she got really drunk, her friend left very early and It was just her and I there and I was thinking to myself.......If I would not have gotten off early from work and came in here she would have been in there drunk by herself with the creepy, stalker guy hanging around her. I took her come and practially carried her into her house and put her into her bed and she passed out. I went out to the living room for a while becuase I was going to wait for her son to come home and I was going to ask him if he would ride up with me to go get her car then all of the sudden I hear her talking to someone in her bedroom on the phone, keep in mind the phone never rang or I would have heard it, so about 15 minutes go by and I go into her room and I guess she thought I had left because she called me by her sons name and she was talking on the phone WITH THE SUPPOSED CREEPY LONELY GUY!!! she said she had to go when she realized who I was and she hung up. I asked her what the hell that was all about and asked why she called him and she said she didnt call him, she said she doesnt know how she got to talkin to him on the phone!! she said either the ringer was off in the living room and I didnt hear it ring in her room or she called her called her mother and he must have called when she was on the phone with her, she said honestly she doesnt know We argued for a while and she made me so mad at one point I just left and she said to NEVER call her again while I was leaving. I am driving home and my cell rings and its her asking me to please come back and stay with her....I do it of course and we talk for hours about things and I guess we made up. The next moring I am laying in bed and the same guy calls twice at like 6am in the morning on a saturday and leaves two messages on the machine!! telling her to wake up it time to go to work on both messages!! she has never worked on the weekends, but why would he call and say that? what is really going on here? I really like this woman and care for her and everything was good up until this last week I am just losing my mind thinking about this. IS SHE SEEING THIS GUY ALSO? she says she feels sorry for him and finds it hard to be mean to people and tell them off or mabye that is all a bunch of crap! I know I should probably just run away but I cant help my feelings, she has alot of problems with depression and drug problems as well, but I dont wanna give up.......I have really fallen hard for her and do not know what to do!