I'm listening with open ears.
southerngirl - I do worry about not giving myself enough time to heal between relationships. This is a pattern of mine -one I am well aware of.
RayKay - I am aware of the moral looseness and have no defense for myself. At this point I just want the break-up to be as painless as possible for my boyfriend.
annie24 - I don't think he is in any position to object to the break-up or ask for a second chance. I have been very verbal about my needs and future goals over the past three years. I have expressed to him several times my dissatisfaction and made it clear what was important to me. He just isn't in the same mind-frame. I have never nagged or argured with him. He knows me and what I need out of this relationship, but he is not willing to change. I am not angry and I don't blame him, it is just who he is.
matius - No worries about STDs. I won't get into specifics, but that is a non-issue.
avman - That is how I feel too.
Relationship Coach - The same thing I said to annie applies. Over a year ago I even broke off the relationship for a short time (a week) giving him all (the same) reasons. He wanted me to give him some time... Well, it has been over a year and nothing has changed. He cannot change because I want him to, he has to change because he wants to, and I know that won't happen anytime soon (if ever). I will be clear and unambiguous when I break-off with him. There will be no scavenger hunt.
I understand your position regarding infidelity and closure but I disagree. My boyfriend has been well aware of what I have been feeling for the past few years, and this will be a logical explanation to him. Telling him I have been with someone else will likely only cause unnecessary hurt and confusion. I do love him so I want to handle this break-up with compassion. By the way, it was not a year-long emotional infidelity. My boyfriend is well aware I have online friends with whom I correspond, and it was only recently things evolved beyond friendship.
