piratefdu

my ex gf who does not go to my school was visiting my school during the summer for a project. she ended up having sex w/ someone i know and is in my social circle (he wasnt aware we dated) and is good friends with a lot my best friends, and hooking up w someone else from my school also. no one wanted to tell me. she broke up w/ me in the first place but after we broke up she def knew i still liked her, and there were many times where she would call and flirt and ask me to come visit then i wouldnt hear from her for weeks. she continued to contact me even tho i told her i could not be friends because i still liked her. whats screwed up is during the whole time this was going on in the summer, she was asking me to hangout and i gave in and we hungout and she acted like notihng was going on, and was being a flirt. weeks later i heard about it thru a friend and i was, hate to say it, pretty hurt and shocked. i was intoxicated at the time so i ended up texting her saying how i found out and that it was messed up. she then tried calling me but at the time i just didnt want to hear her voice or else i would feel sick, and besides, what could we possilby talk about to work through that? seemed pretty cut and dry to me and i was definitely going to trust my best friends version of the story than hers at the moment. then she proceeded to completely start accusing me of being immature and she had no respect for me and couldnt take me seriously. we havent talked since. i talked to a few peopel about it anad they said what she did was wrong, but sometimes i feel bad like i shouldnt have been that upset about it. i just want to hear other peoples thoughts about this...

todd, thats good advice and it makes a lot of sense. But what a terrible feeling, lol. so this whole time she's contacting you it was because she felt 'bad' or wanted some comfort. Sucks!

I have a similar situation. I broke up with my ex months ago and did different things to try to get her back. She would get into this habit of contacting me then I wouldn't hear from her for weeks. It ended with one time when she called me and we ended up having a 3 hour conversation on the phone and her telling me to come visit, then I don't hear from her for a couple weeks again. So I had enough, I still had feelings and I tried, but could not be friends. So the next time she contacted me I told her I dont like the way your contacting me and I would appreciate it if she gave me space for now. The last things she said was 'ohh im not gonna say i dont have feelings for you because i do but i dont want that to get in the way of our friendship' This sounded like such a pathetic line, and nevertheless i did not contact her and she did not contact me (Even blocked me on AIM) and i didnt hear for hear for about 2 months. Then out of the blue she texts me, she was being kinda flirty and said 'we should chill i didnt buy it so i kinda blew her off. a couple weeks later she contacts me again, after her and her friend had called me cause they found some picture of me with my shirt off or something. she texts me but i blew her off again. then its my birthday but im asleep and she calls then leaves a text basically saying call me and stuff. i still wasnt buying it but i asked my friend about it, and i guess this was bad advice, he said 'well maybe she still likes you'. so i do the dreaded thing, still having feelings for her and text her, and she says we should hang out. so im like..ok maybe its true. so i hang out with her, we seem to still have something, some flirting. after we hang out i text her saying 'well i had a good time' and shes just like 'yea...did u get home ok?'. then i dont hear from her for another month and a half! out of the blue like 'i got a new car' and 'we should get together' ok that was a little long winded but is this bascially the same thing? just trying to be 'friends' and be a 'backup' plan?