blaxdiamond

Okay before I moved to Mississippi, I lived all over Europe and some of the states and for the most part, I was only attracted to white men. I'm African American by the way. In Europe, it was the Italian guy or the German guy. When I moved to Indianapaolis, all of my crushes were white guys. I was very color blind. But...when I moved to Mississippi, all of that changed. From my high school to the neighborhood to news events, everything was seemingly separated. It was almost like you knew which side you better be on or else. That's when I started appreciating my race and culture more and looked at black men as the kings that my grandparents used to say. I still have that today. So it's not so much that I wouldn't date outside my race. I'm proud of being black so I would want my husband and children to feel the same about it. I don't know if that's racist as opposed to just being proud.

My book "Caught in the Middle" is about a college student who is an escort who is in an relationship and she tries to keep her two loves separate but finds out that she can't have her cake and eat it too.

Sorry guys for the not so quick reply. I've been under the weather lately. I didn't really answer his question. I didn't say yes or no. I said that I would think about it. The reason why I need to think about it is because these trust issues have been a black cloud over our relationship from the beginning. I haven't cheated on him and he says he hasn't cheated on me but it's like "well, she would have cheated..." instead "no, she didn't cheat on me". I just wonder if that is something I want to hear through a marriage. As far as having a career and a family, I do feel like I can have both. I've always wanted both with him but the last six months has been hard. We've been "living together" and I'm just finding out more about his issues with trust.

This is just post of relating to you. Lately I haven't been wanting to as much as I used to. I think it's because I'm stressing and the fact that it seems like that's all he wants when we're together. I don't know but I feel you 100% girl.

Hi, everyone. I'm new to group and definitely wanted to pose a question. I have several of the posts and saw some wonderful advice. This question will probably even sound repetitive. I've been this guy for 3 years, in fact we just had our three year anniversary. About two months, I asked for space. I'm an author so I wanted time to promote my book. I knew that I couldn't put 100% in both promoting and being there for my relationship. When we would have dinner or have time to go out, I would always need to promote or do something related to my book. He didn't understand "space". He thought I was breaking up with him. That wasn't the case. I wasn't really happy with a lot of things but it was because I wasn't promoting my book the way I wanted. So the space notion went out the window. Then we started arguing about trust issues. He thought I was looking for someone else and I thought he was looking to spend time with one of his buddies' wife. (Long story with that! We then say we'll work on the trust issues. Then just a month ago, after all of this craziness and not a lot of time for my book, he proposes. For nonchalantly, he says we need to get married. No ring or real proposal. Just "let's get married". I love him very much and I do want the life after the wedding but should I said yes? Even moreso, should I ask for something a little more serious? There's more to this story but I don't want to scare the group on my first post. Cassandra Caught in the Middle link removed