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only_me_1974

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  1. only_me_1974
    Thanks I am going to ask my dr. about other options and additions that might help.
  2. only_me_1974
    Thanks to you both. I will look into getting a "toy", CB! That sounds like a good idea. It is very frustrating to keep trying and I think you are right about "trying to will it to happen". It just used to be so much easier, I guess I expect it to be the same now as it was prior to the dosage being increased. RoboWarrior, I used to be all against meds, but I realized that now that I am on them I am able to deal just a bit better with everything. It just helps to stabilize my moods enough so that I am able to concentrate on things easier and helps with focus as I have a tendency to "zone out" a lot. Part of that is due to Dissociation, I know. I want to get off of them again, eventually. I hate being on them, but at the same time they have helped. I would much rather be "happier" than have the orgasms, but I have to say that an orgasm would make me REALLY HAPPY right about now.
  3. only_me_1974
    I have not been able to have an orgasm in over a week. I am able to get aroused, but can never seem to finish. I started taking a higher dose of Lamictal last week and am already on Zoloft. I was wondering if there is anyone else that may have the same problem? Has the problem gone away? Should I talk to my psychiatrist about switching meds? Should I just deal with it? Is this mainly a female problem or are there any men that have this problem?
  4. only_me_1974
    Yeah, you are right. I will email her. Thanks
  5. only_me_1974
    I can email her, but I am really not into bothering her. I know that I can, but it is almost like I need to learn how to deal without her. I am glad I am not alone. Thanks
  6. only_me_1974
    of panic. Ever since I went to therapy on Thursday, I just can't chill out. I have tried breathing, thinking of a happy place, taking a walk, watching a funny movie, but nothing is working. It is all because of DID. One of my "parts" freaked out and ever since then I have been having panic attacks. I really don't know what to do. I hate this feeling more than anything. The discomfort of it makes me cry. It is so scary to feel like you are having a heart attack, when you know that isn't the case. Just needed to vent I guess.
  7. only_me_1974
    Welcome and I am so sorry to hear that happened to you. It sucks when the ones that are supposed to help aren't there when you need them. I was having a hard day too and i came here to talk and it really truly helped. Plus, I met some really cool people. I wish I had something wise and profound to say, but I am at a loss right now. Know that there are people here that care and will help when we can.
  8. only_me_1974
    MEEEE TOOOO Here's a better one for ya: image removed
  9. only_me_1974
    Anytime! You can PM me if you need anything, and I do mean ANYTHING! ((((HUGS)))) if you like em, if not sorry.
  10. only_me_1974
    Hey Musicguy, I know, sort of, what you are going through. I am having a tough time too. I know if you keep talking you will feel better. I didn't think talking would help, but my friends here have been amazingly supportive. Don't give up, we can jump over these darned hurdles together *offers hand* if you want.
  11. only_me_1974
    I know I am not the only one to be going through life wanting it all to end. I think it is just the frustration that is so high. Maybe I do need to just let go for a while. There are so many things I haven't thought about. IDK, I guess I just need to cry and get some of this out. thanks for the support everyone. It means a lot.
  12. only_me_1974
    Yeah, it makes me really upset. I am so confused. I really don't know what to do. I know my mom would miss me, but I don't know.
  13. only_me_1974
    I'm sorry for your loss. I just really can't seem to fight this uphill battle. I am really tired, just really tired.
  14. only_me_1974
    Ta_ree_saw and reluctant rebuilder - I can't go to hospital again. not ever. that is the worst place in the world. They only want to put meds in your system and really don't care. LittleBlue - there is nowhere to go. I couldn't go anywhere alone anyways, I am social phobic. Orlander - Thanks. I really don't know what else to say. How could you care about me, you have never even met me? Dako - Mom is going to die and I don't think anything happening to me could make that any worse or better. Also, I could never explain to my family how I feel because they would call the cops and I would get thrown in the hospital. They would think I was crazy or something. I guess I should tell you all that I have DID too. It's a little hard to explain, but if you look it up, you will get it. This has caused me to have conflict in my mind. I can't keep up the constant bantering between the ones in my mind. I can't keep the little one from throwing fits and I can't keep playing referee. I just can't keep it up. Sorry if you don't understand. Just the way my mind is messed up I guess.
  15. only_me_1974
    I really don't have any reason to sugar coat my life anymore. There is no reason for me to pretend to be happy anymore. No one will ever understand what I am dealing with on a daily basis. I can't cry in my home because someone may walk in and ask what's wrong and I can't tell them. Mom's cancer is worse, job sucks, therapist doesn't help, meds don't help, unable to be in a relationship as no one would want me. I am so damaged and I just want to make sure that someone knows why this has to happen. Because I am finished, done, fedup and just plain pissed off. Maybe my family will find this and understand that there is nothing they could say or do to stop me. I hope they understand that anywhere is better than here.:sad:
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