life_hard

Don, Hahaha, I was reading about oxytocin as well. Last year, National Geographic had a great article about it and here is the link, looks like the don't have the full article online. link removed But Don, the love molecule itself is "phenylethylamine" that actually give us the rush, but the bonding molecue "oxytocin" is the bonding molecule. Here is a great article distinguishing the two. link removed I am also battling with this rush myself and I am fully aware of it. I fell in love with someone I dated few months ago, but I had to break it off cos he is bad news in the long run. But I manage to see him every so often, once or twice a month and every time it's a lot of fun, we had a blast this weekend, but then the withdrawal symtoms kick in today, monday!!! I feel like missing him but it is the internal drug that I am missing. But oddly enough, the reason why I broke it off with him is, we went on a week long trip last fall, when we came back, he withdrew slightly, called me less often and seems to pull aways, so I broke it off. So for some men, what I suspect is - the conquering of women mode kicks in. After they know they could "have" you or they "had" you, then the challenge is gone, they then get bored....they are not trully in love with you, but just high on it.... oh I don't... too complicated to analyse it to death.... I guess we just have to live!!! Live!

HI BeeBee and Donster!!! OMG, the two people that gave me wonderful support during some tough time of mine *big hug*

It's just a complicated thing, but I honestly feel that it is inappropriate to show pictures of other people to 3rd party without asking them in certain situation and THIS IS those certain situations and it should be asked like "can I show you my pictures to my friends"....kinda of like "can I give you your number to this friend" only a polite thing to do.... ug.... forget it...

I am not divorced yet, my husband is a well known person in his field etc etc and his family is very well established and few people may recongise me as his wife. I went on date with a man several times, although I didn't tell him to be discreet, I assume that it should be and I told him that I don't want exposure at all. But he end up showing a picture of me to one of his friends on purpose to show how good looking I am... I reacted and told him he shouldn't do that.... I got real mad at him.... Am i over reacting? thanks

bighair, you said there is a guy you hit it off with but he never called back..... like what the heck???? they never called back? why? It happened to me... makes me wonder is it me? what do you make of that?

You cried over it???? You're taking it WAY too personally...Geeez.... listen... I will try my best to explain some of my experiences and try not to let you know perhaps you're a bit of a prude. I had men who couldn't come at all inside of me, they have issues, not sensitive enough etc etc... it's ALL a mental game... sex is very mental. Just cos he pulled it out doesn't mean he is degrading you, he may find it relieving to take the condom out, he may not want to impregnate you... etc etc... but for crying over it???? I am sorry, you really need to understand the ejaculation mental state of men, there ARE MANY MANY state and variation of what they are thinking, some are complex and some are degrading and some are just very simple.... but please please don't cry over it, it is not about YOU, if you think it is all about YOU, then you're too self centered.... Hey, I know this sound harsh... but I just want to give you a different perspective on this.. sorry if I trully offended you....

Shadow, Thank you for your comments.... I think you have mistaken, it is like this: "My bad date reminds me of our good dates together..." Besides he is active on link removed anyway It says, I am dating and moving on too since you haven't called but I still like you and think about our good dates.... kinda of like that...

Thank you!!!!!!!!!! Deal, I made the decision, not sending it.... You guys are a great great great bunch..... Yes very right... often times, you can't see yourself and you guys put things in perspective for me... I think too much with my heart, that is a problem

I had an earlier thread of my situation and I am just pasting here: Went out on 2 dates with a guy who is in town for business, no sex happened although he wanted it. We clicked right away and he even said he will call me and before he left, he emailed me from the airplane saying he will be in my thoughts and want to see me in the future. He comes in and out a lot. Well, after he left, I send him a messge saying "Hope you made it in okay,etc etc", I then send him a very tomboyish picture of myself to go with his thought, then I said I will send him a more feminine picture of myself later.... He is very active on link removed over the past few days..... It has been about 2 weeks and I want to send this letter: Hi xxxx, Just wanted to say hi. I went out on a "bad" date this past weekend and afterwards I just remembered how good our get together was few weeks ago. Anyway, I haven't heard from you since you went home, I am sure there is a good reason for it. Even if you may not be all that into me, somehow I still want to give you an ego boost and let you know that my gut feeling still tells me you're a great and good person... Afterall I am so new to this dating scene, so....oh well...anyway, my bad date reminded me of you ========= If he is a player and bad person, it will embarrassed him, if he is sincere then he will respond... what do you guys think?

It sounds to be that you guys may be emotionally incompatible. If at this early state, there are some sort of negative emotions going on, it is somewhat a red flag, at this early stage, it should be all fun and warm feeling inside....

Just realise that "HE IS NOT THAT INTO ME!!!!" He now went back to his hometown and hasn't contacted me and I now just saw him on link removed online. I guess I am expecting too much after 2 wonderful dates....it still hurts.... odd.....

Just want to start a thread here so that we all understand and define these 3 important components in good relationship. I will start first: emotional compatability - ability to understand each other's feeling and express them, frequency of contact like once every day or once every week is sufficient intellectual compatibility- Like to read the same types of books and movies and being able to disuss it in a deep level sexual compatibility - frequency of course, being adventurous, like to role play at times... your definition?

I just realise something and I am laughing at myself. I am pathetic.... absolutely PATHETIC!!!!!!!!! After 2 dates? Yeah, I have issues....

Hi nemo, Oh it is a very very different picture of me. When he saw me, I have long hair and no glasses at all, but I told him that I use to have very very short hair and I had glasses on as well. So it is a different me, that is why I am sending him the picture. Beside, he said I will be in his thoughts before he left, so I thought sending him a picture of myself to go with that thought might be okay, No?? nemo? Also, if he does feel that way (the way you describe) wanting him to frame it, then we are not emotionally compatible at all. It was a fun gesture and a sort of funny different picture of me, a different side, it was meant to be fun 75% and the 25% yes, to remind him of how I can look differently (may be).

Guys, you are a great bunch. Here is an issue, tell me if he is just not that into me. Went out on 2 dates with a guy who is in town for business. He comes in and out a lot. We clicked right away and he even said he will call me and before he left, he emailed me from the airplane saying he will be in my thoughts and want to see me in the future. Well, after he left, I send him a messge saying "Hope you made it in okay, traveling is tough these days", I then send him a very tomboyish picture of myself to go with his thought, then I said I will send him a more feminine picture of myself later.... It has been 2 days now, he hasn't emailed me back... I thought he would want to see a more pretty picture of me, would want to contact me. No we haven't had sex, even though he wanted to on our second date. I just found out that he just logged onto link removed and has been active within 24hrs. What is going one? Is it me? He is not that into me? Playing hard to get on his part? He is a very busy person.... Any insight would be great....