Jump to content

cherrytree

Members
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    36

  • Joined

 Content Type 

Everything posted by cherrytree

  1. cherrytree
    I guess because I still care, even though he doesn't. I'm going to do some traveling with my sister and friends and hopefully that will help put some distance between me and him. Not real distance but make me get over him faster.
  2. cherrytree
    I thought he was sincere when we got back together. He even talked about our future, being married.
  3. cherrytree
    It depends on how well you know the guy. Personally I wouldn't invite a guy into my house that I didn't know very well. If you don't feel comfortable, I'd suggest something fun, like mini-golf or maybe going bike riding if you do that, and take a picnic in backpacks. If it's cold where you are, maybe you could treat him to a college basketball game and then dinner at a fun restaurant. But if you do feel comfortable, a casual dinner is a cool idea. Keep it simple though--something you are familiar with making. Then it will look to him like you're a breeze in the kitchen and it will be good too! You could have him over to watch the game on TV and make man-food like chili and/or wings and stuff like that. Just a suggestion!
  4. cherrytree
    That's awful! But good for you for getting back on track.
  5. cherrytree
    How do you get rid of a "hold" that an ex has on you? You're not in contact with him, no ties, no common friends any more.
  6. cherrytree
    Don't. They always come back out of the woodwork after you find someone you are interested in. Don't go back.
  7. cherrytree
    Anyone who uses any of these lines is a jerk anyway and doesn't really deserve an answer. It usually IS them, they don't know how to be with anyone, they don't know how to love anyone, and they are not your friend...so give 'em all the space they want. Just say, goodbye, good luck...and walk away. You don't need them and after that, you really don't want them. You don't deserve to be treated like yesterday's dirty socks.
  8. cherrytree
    So if I'm dealing w/a guy who wasn't very nice, broke up w/me and I'd love for him to come back to me & realize what we had can still be, is it better to do NC or should I be talking to him?
  9. cherrytree
    That is SO true...I loved the "throwing pearls before swine"...great image! You're right, I can't hold on to that. Maybe he did realize what an idiot he is, which might be why he calls after that, acting like he cares. Some days I'm angry, some days sad, some days I say "good riddance". I want to get to the point where it doesn't affect me one way or the other. It gets better by the day. HHWH: Great analogy--no I wouldn't! I guess that's like not answering returning my ex's calls, etc...I would not want to open the door to let him hurt me again.
  10. cherrytree
    I am sooooo tired of putting myself out there, giving someone my heart, my love, and all of me, and having it stepped on time after time. I think he broke me. I think my "person picker" is broken.
  11. cherrytree
    You know what, I have felt that way before w/him...like he was in it for selfish reasons & not because he actually loved me.
  12. cherrytree
    It's rough, isn't it paco? To maintain even though you're dying inside. I long to talk to him, to hear his voice, to touch him, hold him, love him, laugh and smile, walk through the woods holding hands...all of that. It's all that that is hard to let go...just him. I still mistrust him, don't get me wrong...but the letting go is hard. So I'm doing like you, self-preserving and self-respecting...trying to finally let go like you, so I understand what you're going through.
  13. cherrytree
    If they don't want you to move on, why do they say it? If they don't want you, why the desire to feel safe in the knowledge that the other person wouldn't be? That sounds...manipulative? Controlling? Why keep hanging on to something you don't want? That seems crazy. Forgive me for sounding judgemental! But that's really what he did to me, isn't it? Made a judgement knowing the good person I was and chose not to continue anyhow. So it reinforces to me that it wasn't me, it was him (to use a breaking-up cliche.)
  14. cherrytree
    Did you break up with him, or he with you?
  15. cherrytree
    I think so--if he wanted to get back together, wouldn't he say so? I do believe he is extremely insecure. I don't think he knows what he wants to do. Like he wanted to show strenght by letting go but he can't because maybe somewhere in there are some deep feelings for me...the kind that make him want to stay. I don't know. Or maybe he thought I was going to leave first so he was beating me to the punch. I know I should ask him, but that means talking to him and I don't want to go there because I don't need that aggravation. I'm dying to do things with him...to get our friendship back, and even our relationship. But not at the expense of putting my self-worth aside. It still exists in there somewhere But if he says "let's talk", I might be too tempted.
  16. cherrytree
    Wow, I like the word "exploit". He has told me to find someone else to date, and he's ok with that. But this keeping tabs says the opposite of that. Maybe he didn't want to break up in the first place. Maybe he didn't know what he was doing. Either way I don't want to sit around and either wait for him or be his doormat...that would be even more crazy than he is acting. Even though I still love him. Guess I have to be stronger than that. I wouldn't keep calling someone I broke up with. I left out that his moods weren't necessarily the up and downs, even though they were that, but the way he treats me is. He flies totally off the handle when I tell him what's on my mind but then when I won't talk to him any more he gets all nice (like he did today) and wants to know what's up in my life. Then back to square one. It's almost like he has a split personality. Maybe something happened I don't know about... Grrrr
  17. cherrytree
    I have sort of been suspecting the "reserve" thing too...like he doesn't want me to move on even if he is. I was his 1st real gf in his life (he was my 2nd that I'd consider a bf even though I dated others). I am having a hard time saying, that's it, you made your choice...but I guess to make myself stronger I can't reply. Isn't that like standing up for myself, and not letting him give me any "baloney"?
  18. cherrytree
    Should I even worry about how he feels? Again, my heart is saying yes but my head says no. Ugh!
  19. cherrytree
    I don't trust him, it's true. He's done enough up and down to make me not trust him. He's done it a lot. My friends say don't let him back...that if I want him out of my life, to keep on with the NC anyway and he'll quit too.
  20. cherrytree
    At first I was in NC for a LONG time, several months...then broke it once. Then the mess happened & I cut him off again. I want to protect myself and move on but I can't let go. I don't know if I should let him back in or not.
  21. cherrytree
    Would you guys follow your heart, based on who you are as a person and how you feel, or your head, based on past experiences with a particular person? Example: If you decided to do total NC with your ex after trying to be friends after they break up with you and they expect you to behave/talk to them as if you're still in a relationship (but you don't so they flip out and you decide to cut off all contact), but they email you a few weeks later to say hi and ask how things are, would you respond? My bf did this but I am not sure I want to respond even though I feel like I do.
  22. cherrytree
    Wow...I never heard about meeting up with a person's soul in your dreams. That makes me want to call him up, or at least send him a text, and ask him what he dreamed about last night! Grrrr...Oh yeah, this is the 2nd time I dreamed about him since we broke up. The first time we were walking along some trail and just talking.
  23. cherrytree
    Hmmm, does anyone know of any good dream analysis sites? Maybe I could look it up or something. I felt strange when I woke up. It was almost like those dreams where your mind takes you one way but then you sort of control what's going on? Maybe in the dream I wasn't supposed to find him but I ended up "making" myself look for him anyhow.
  24. cherrytree
    Last night I had a weird dream about my ex. In the dream we were working for the same company...I guess it was a large office. He shared his office with 2 other people in the dream and their names were on the door. It wasn't either of our jobs. In my dream I was walking around trying to find someone to give some papers to or something, but then I passed his office and peeked in to see if he was there. He wasn't, but I kept looking for him. So the dream turned into me looking for him. I saw him and we both started talking to the same other person who we worked with, and he stood right up next to my side and put his arm around my waist while we stood there. After we broke up we haven't talked any. He's sent me about 1 text message per week or emails, but I haven't responded. What could be the meaning of this dream? I'm trying to get over him but it's hard. I still have bad times. Last night before I went to sleep was one. I wonder if that was an effect? Why would I be looking for him after all of that?
×
×
  • Create New...