milly
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Everything posted by milly
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My ex and I broke up in July so it has been a few months. I was starting to feel a lot better too. I still thought about him a lot but I wasn't crying anymore. Then I found out he likes someone else and I just felt terrible like someone hit me in the face. Everytime it crosses my mind I feel like I'm going to cry. I tried to stay busy all weekend but I just kept thinking about it. I thought I was over him but this really upset me. I wish I could just forget about it. I just want to be over him so badly. Our break up was pretty crappy. We dated for 2 years and he dumped me on the phone with a brief and lame explanation. We had NC for a few months and then he called me a few times and we talked online. We haven't talked in a few months. I don't feel like I want him back I feel really confused. I don't even know what I want but right now I feel terrible. I feel like I'm back at the beginning and I feel pathetic. I don't even feel like I can talk to my friends about it because I feel like they will think I should be over it already. Any advice or thougtht?
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Ok so my bf and I had been together for awhile and very serious about each other and had discussed marriage several times. I graduated last year from college and was planning on moving to accross the country to attend grad school. My bf was 2 years younger and still had some undergrad work to finishbut was planning on changing schools anyway. My BF always acted like he wanted to come along with me for months. However a few months before we broke-up he changed his mind about moving and we fought about it all the time. He wanted me to stay in the area and I really wanted him to come with me. He didn't really try to convince me to stay but rather just suggested it. In May I moved home which was 2 and half hours from him. We broke up in July and it was a quick and crappy phone break-up. Anyway it has been bothering me ever since if my moving plans were really the cause. Since we are NC I haven't really discussed it with him. He used it as a reason when he broke up saying "well you won't be around anymore" The part I find weird is that he broke up with me months before I was planning to move and my move is still dependent on whether I get into school or not. I just don't understand if my move was really the reason he sure didn't beg me to stay or wait until I left to end it. My friends believe he was distancing himself beforehand. Any opinions about this? I've been obsessing about it lately.
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I think it can be hard to be around people the first month. I had to force myself to go out with friends. It seemed to make me want to cry to be with happy people. Just try and hang in there. Don't call. It will get better.
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Thank you so much for all the support. I am trying very hard to change my situation and move on from the past but still have really bad days. I'm so glad I found this website because I have difficulty reaching out from help from my friends and family because I think they believe I should be over it by now. I just want everyone here to know how much it means to me to read your kind and supportive words of advice. Thanks!
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I don't think I could have contact with my ex like you do shoebaby1. I wouldn't be able to handle being in his company without crying. That is why I am afraid to contact him because I know I will be a pathetic mess.
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I'm just having a really bad day and thought it might help to post about it on here. I have had NC for a little over 2 months since my bf and I broke up. I just feel like calling him and I know that I shouldn't. I've just moved home from college 4 months ago and still don't have many friends in the area. I just feel so alone and I miss him so much. I miss all these stupid things and I don't want to date anyone else. I feel like like I am in such a rut and I don't know what to do. I wish we were still together every minute of the day. Why does this hurt so badly? I just don't understand how he could walk away so easily. I just really want to stop crying all the time. I guess I'm just looking for any kind of encouragment I feel like I'm going crazy.
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how long until you really felt better
milly replied to milly's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
Thanks for all the responses. I guess I just need to give myself more time and was curious how long it took others to deal with their loss. This makes me feel hopeful that things will continue to improve over the next few months. I haven't talked to my ex since the break-up but for some reason I felt like he was over me the next day.... maybe I'm just assuming since he never made contact but I guess that is for the best right now. -
how long until you really felt better
milly replied to milly's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
My relationship lasted for 2 years. -
I'm sure it is different for everyone I was just wondering how long until you really started to feel better about the break-up and feel you were no longer in love with your ex. It has been 2 months since my break-up and although I feel a little better about things I still feel like I'm in love with him and haven't been able to move on. I was just curious how long it took for others if you wouldn't mind sharing.
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yeah that is the reason I was thinking of calling. I was just afraid because I wasn't sure it would be worth it if he was mean but than maybe that will help me to think he is a jerk. haha
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This isn't what I wanted everyone to say . Haha I was secretly hoping everyone would think it is a great idea I call him. I guess i know its better to stick with NC. I just feel so sad when I wonder why he left me but I guess it doesn't matter cause if he loved me, he would call. Its just I was sort of mean at the end of mini break-up conversation and told him to have a nice life (original I know) and I hung up. I guess as silly as it sounds I feel guilty for being mean but I was so caught off guard and upset by the break-up. I guess I will stick with NC. I just wish I could stop thinking about him all the time...
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So I have been thinking about calling my ex. He broke up with me about 2 months ago. We had been dating for 2 years and we broke up over the phone in about 20 minutes. I had been doing much better but lately I've been really depressed again. I'm hoping this depressed and crying phase will pass soon. I was thinking of calling him after I start to feel a little better which might take a week or two. I feel a little unsure about calling him though. We haven't had any contact at all since the night we broke up. I don't want to be friends yet I think I'd just like to discuss things since the night it happened I was so upset I barely remember what was said. I don't know if this is a good idea. I thought it might help but I'm afraid he might be mean to me and think I should be over it and not want to talk. I'm afraid how I will feel if he ignores me or is rude. I feel pathetic for saying that but it is true. Do you think I should wait for him to contact me or just call and see what happens?
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It has 2 months since my bf and I broke up and we have had no contact since that day. I was starting to feel so much better and hadn't cried in days. Then suddenly I feel so hopeless again. I had a dream about him last night in which he was mean to me. I also just found out me moved and is starting school. For some reason this news really upset me. I guess because it seems he is moving on with his life and making changes without me. I still feel like I am in the same place. I want to call me so badly but I know I shouldn't. I was really hoping I would be further along than this after almost 2 months NC. I feel so discouraged.
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I'm having a really bad day today. I just started a new job and I hate it. I miss my ex so much but esp. when I'm feeling down and he is the one I really want to talk to about things. It has been 2 weeks since we broke up and stopped talking. I'm not really tempted to call because I'm afraid he won't be anything like he was before and it will upset me even more. I was starting to do better. until today. I just can't stop crying. I miss him so much. I guess it just makes me feel better to share this. I feel like crawling into a hole. I haven't really been eating. I just want to feel normal again.
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What I learned from One Month of NC and you can too!
milly replied to shelly7's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
I'm only on day 8 but this makes me feel more hopeful. I hope I feel as good as you after a month. -
My boyrfriend broke up with me less than a week ago and I just found out he is already interested in someone else. I can't even describe how I feel right now. I really thought he was in love with me but I guess I so wrong. I feel like such an idiot. The only thing that comforted me before was thinking he might be missing me even a little. We have had no contact since the break up. I just feel awful. Please tell me this gets better soon.
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I know how you feel and it is tough because one day you're so close and the next you're like strangers. My best advice is everytime you want to call him just call a friend. They should be able to remind you why not to call him. Good luck
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I was having some problems with my boyrfriend and we had been fighting more than normal. Last week he stopped calling me for no reason and we hadn't even had a fight. I was so confused and finally I got him on the phone after 4 days. Well he dumped me over the phone after being together for 2 years. He didn't really give me a reason and we only talked for 20 minutes because he said he couldn't talk long. This was 2 days ago and I haven't talked to him since. I was shocked that he did it so quickly like it meant nothing. I know I want to take a break and have no contact for a few months but I'm not sure if I should call him beforehand. I would like some answers but I don't want to seem pathetic and I don't even know if he'll have any answers to give me. I just kind of want to get it out of the way and feel like I knew what happened and why. Any advice?
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That is another confusing thing. He tells me how much he loves me and wants to be with me all the time. His behavior and what he says are completely opposite. People will lie but they will rarely live the lie.
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I could really use some advice or even just feedback. I started dating my bf 2 years ago. There is a slight age difference of 2 yrs. I'm 23 and he is 21 so I hesitated to date someone younger and we were friends for the first 2 months. We had a great relationship and went through some very hard times together. These times included a period when he couldn't walk and was in the hospital. These hard times only seemed to bring us closer. He even asked me to marry him but needed time for a ring. About 4 months ago we started to have problems and argue a lot. I just graduated from college and have been planning to attend a grad school accross the country. He always said how he wanted to go with me and acted excited about it. Then 4 months ago he changed his mind. That was very hard for me to accept and we argued about it quite a bit. He kept going back and forth about his decision to move and I would get upset when he would tell me he just didn't think he could go. I wish I had handled it better but I felt so rejected by his sudden change of heart. About 2 months later we broke up. I actually brooke up with him but quickly regretted it and we got back together in a few days. I just felt like I cared about him more. Then he broke up with me and again we got back together. I moved home from school that month which is about 2 hours away from him. We talk on the phone but sometimes he will go days without calling and it really upsets me. I've told him this too. I asked him to visit this weekend and he said he didn't feel like it. This upset me but I didn't really say anything just that I had to go. We haven't talked in 3 days. I called him yesterday and twice tonight. Once I left a crying and upset message which I now kind of regret. I feel pathetic and don't know if I can bring myself to end it. I just can't stop crying and feeling like a fool. I just don't understand how he can ignore when he knows it upsets me so much. I wish I knew why he doesn't just dump me. I have been crying all weekend and feel like a mess. Any comments would be great.