candywor

I don't think you did anything really wrong cause you cancelled out on the girl and your actions were to make her jealous. Her actions in breaking up with you were extreme. If she really cared about you, she would see that you were trying to make her jealous but you didn't follow through because of your love for her. I think you seriouly need to rethink being in a relationship with her as people that usually go to the club and leave their significant others at home all the time does that for a reason. After all she can hang out with the girls and bring you along now and then. None of her girlfriends from my experience would look down on her for doing that. She's walking all over you and being inconsiderate of your points. She should respect your feelings.

I agree with Beec. Your friend is upset and he has every right to me. You should apologize instead of trying to figure out who's right or wrong cause in this case your actions offended him, and ignore the previous cases esp if you value his friendship

Its seems like she getting ready to break up with you and is trying to gave you signs or let you down easily

Maybe she got turned off by all the texting. I don't think at the start of getting to know someone it should be mainly by text. It shows disinterest because you can't have serious getting to know you conversations by texting. Also girls still like to be called, they want to know that you made the effort to pick up the phone, even if its to say hi for a second.

Initiate conversation with ex telling him how he affected you and that you feel the relationship is on his terms even though he was responsible for the breakup. Tell him since you both are taking it slow that you assume that it means that you are not committed to each other 100% and allowed to go out with other people. See how he reacts from there. Don't go out with the guy behind his back. Let him know that way no one can say you deceived them later on as in the case of what he did to you. Candice

I hate talking about him, but how can I get over this if I keep it all inside. I was doing that and doing fine, I would have my down time but I was ok. Now I can't keep all the hurt inside. Now for the first time I am really feeling seriously depressed about this whole situation. I didn't really planned on having sex with him to get back together, it would just happen because we would end up seeing each other. I had kind of accept that we were not together, because how could I stayed with someone who did not love me, but my love for him made me ask those stupid questions like if he would want to get back with me. I don't know how to make myself feel better but posting helps

The worst thing about it is that I got advised to do No Contact but didn't listen and now I'm suffering for it. I thought that he at least had respect for me, but now I am learning different

I feel so disappointed in myself. I can't believe I let him use me like that. We have been broken up for over a month now, but slept together a 4 times through out that, but the last time is when I realized that I am being used, and it hurts that he can use me that easily and act so casually towards me. I was doing ok not sobbing, not even calling. He would call me once every week or text me. I was great, I wasn't going over to his place when he invited me and I felt like I was getting over him. Now I feel like I'm back to the same place. He came by on Saturday, literally showed up at my door after I called him to return his call. We ended up having sex. I would ask him questions, like if he missed me or if he felt like getting back with me and he said he missed me and sometimes he felt like getting back with me but just not right now. I don't know why I am being so stupid. This is a guy that said he does not love me, after a year and a half, or say he doesn't know or say, I could fall in love with you in the future. This is a guy that said that he felt like I was a burden to him because I wanted him to call me everyday to find out how I was doing. I asked him if he wanted to go to the movies. My first sign of weakness because I haven't attempted to hang out with him, he was the one trying to hang out with me. He gives me an excuse, not tonight because he had something planned and doesn't know when he will be back, but Sunday for sure. Sunday comes around and he drops by again early because he forgot his shades. I should have known he had no intentions of seeing me. Anyway I called him saying did u forget that we were supposed to go out and he's like he asked me earlier if I still wanted to go out but I never said anything, then he's like I'll call you when I get home, and never calls me. I feel so hurt because I allowed him to do this to me. I ended up calling him 3 times and he ignored my calls and I left two messages saying he could have just told me he didn't want to go in the first place instead of ignoring my calls and making me feel like * * * * again. I called him twice and left another message saying how selfish and cold he is and how he doesn't care at all how I feel that he doesn't even think I deserve a return phone call. Why was I so stupid, now I feel so low probably lower than when we first broke up. I hope he's happy because now I'm feeling the worst pain and crying even more than when we broke up. I always felt bad about ignoring him or talking to him, but now I have reasons to cause he chose to be so sold and casual to me

Well we used to live on the same block. I literally had to pass his house to get to mines, but lucky I moved right after we broke up, but we still take the same bus. Yesterday he text me if I wanted to come over. I replied, I know thats the last time, but I replied to say no. Calling a friend was the only thing that stopped me from going over.

Avoid her until she makes the decision, but let her know that you are open to contact once she breaks off her engagement. This is a recipe for hurt on your part. She engaged. Obviously if she does not care to be with that person, common sense will make her break it off, that is the rest of her life after all, until then do not believe what she says. Action speaks louder than words

I understand, but I can't understand why does he act like he still wants to be with me esp for someone who said that he does not love me.

. This is the breakup. I keep running into him. I have run into him twice in the last week cause we live in the same area. I was trying to do the No Contact to avoid him, but how can I do that if I keep running into him. And the next thing is that we still talk, like if we are friends. In fact we have had sex a few times after we broke up about 5 weeks ago. We went out to dinner on my birthday, which was really nice. He bought me a birthday gift and the whole works, then we went out to a bar one time, which was good too. I asked him if he wanted to get back together, but he said no cause we would be fighting over the same things, how we can't get back together now but maybe some time in the future but yet he still wants to hang out with me. I told him I was going to a club and he got pissed that I didn't call him to tell him that I was going, cause we saw each other on the bus and he asked me what I was doing and then he said give him a call, which I didn't cause if I'm going to a club its to meet people to get over him, not dance with him and fall into the same trap of ending up in bed with him. Then he called me over the weekend, big shocker, and I asked him what he was calling me for?? He not the one to just pick up and call and he got offended. I honestly still love him, but I do not get him, and I think I should move on and I really do not care to hear about his new girlfriend, though he said he not looking to meet anyone right now. I told him I went on a date and he acted like it was no big deal, but made a comment that I'm already moving on. What should I do? I feel like I left the door open to him, and he's not really taking it, but it's like he looking at something more casual

Since You've Been Gone - Kelly Clarkson. This song actually makes you feel happy about breaking up

His actions are fine. He made time for me, carry me out and generally try to do anything that I ask of him, and he would go the extra step in pleasing me but at the start it wasn't always like that, he was into himself and making sure he did what he had to do before seeing me or considering me. We ususally see each other on the weekends because he works long hours, while before he would reserve a day for his friends, now he spends the whole weekend with me. He comes accross as if he has commitment issues, and a little emotionally detached in the fact that I always have to ask him if he misses me for him to say so. He would only tell me that after a long extended period, like the time when I went on vacation for a month Or I would have to ask him if he wanted to go out, which would piss me off and he would reply that he it was unspoken that he had intentions of spending the evening with me and I think his not being able to tell me that is an extended version of that. Me bringing up the How do u feel about me conversation got him pissed because he's like we always fight when I don't get the answer I want and he doesn't think he could deal with that again. I thought the coldest thing he could say to me was I love you but I'm not in love with you because he told me that the only girl he ever loved told him that, but now he claims he wasn't sure if he loved her for real cause he has no feelings whatsoever to her, and if you love someone part of you always loves that person. Plus it took us six months before we officially became a couple even though we were dating exclusively and doing everything exclusively. His answer to that was that he had just got out of some * * * * but that anyone that looked at us would know that we were more than friends. He hasn't called me since the breakup which didn't end very good cause I told him that he was a very cold person, and I regret having gotten involved with him, which he didn't like, but we still went out to dinner that night. Then I twisted my ankle on a Saturday, and he was all over going to BBQ's and never offered to see me until Monday, though he did ask me if I wanted to go to a doctor and I turned him down, and I turned him down on Monday too which led to another argument about what a cold person he was as he made sure to go to a BBQ that day too. Since then he took me to work and picked me up because of my ankle, but the last day I saw him we talked friendly, but he has never called me since then and neither have I called him. I feel like I'm making the right decision by moving on. I feel like I am at the end of my rope, and maybe I get the impression he feels the same way too, but I feel like if I push him he will probably say lets try again, but I don't want to do that and feel like I'm in a dead end situation again. This is a guy that I love, but I feel like I have to walk away still, because I do think like a year and a half is enough time? If he can't even tell me he loves me after a year and a half how long do I have to wait for the marriage proposal. I'm 26 and he's 30. I need to know if this makes sense?

Well I feel some of the same sentiments that you wrote about. The thing is how long should I be in a relationship without knowing whether the person loves me or not. How drastically is things going to change in the next month. He makes me feel like I'm watiing for him to tell me that he loves me, and it makes me feel like I'm just existing