Zeldaster

Hello, Here is a short story I have, and I hope you have some advice for me. A girl I have know for a while and I have recently gotten back together from 2 previous relationships. These relationships were short and didn't end well. After these 2 realationships, for a period of about 2 months, she wanted us to go out, but I did notgo out with her then. We hung out and talked on them phone a lot, but never any actual dating. That was in may/june/july. Recently, I started liking her again, and I told her so, and we started going out. Now, the night of us starting to go out again, we had to leave for a trip with our marching band. We drove there, hung out, talked, generally chilled, blah. Then things got bad. Her adittude towards me got progressivly worse. Even with simple questions like, "Are you OK?" I'd either get no response or 'not right now', or just a general blowing-off. Again, this was over a period of 2 days. Now, we were gone for the weekend, and on the saturday night. I found and followed, lightly chatting as she followed another older bandmember(male) through the hotel. Nobody in the band knew that we were going out, and we had decided to not show excessive amounts of public affection. But this get's rediculous. We went into a hotel room full of mostly guys, people I and she knew, and the older band member. After slight pressure from the older bandmember, she sat infront of all of us and lifted up her shirt, flashing us all right there in the hotel. Now, not wanting to make a scene, I kept my mouth shut and sat there. Under more pressure, she did it again. Things were heading south, if you understand, and would've gotten there had she not had to leave. I am unconfortable with this for the obvious reasons, and becuase I had the feeling she would've done that if I was there or not. Before things were going bad, she said she liked me very much and was glad we were going out. But all this happens? Also this all lead up to a big cresindo where we went home mostly in silence. I really like her, and she claims to feel the same, but is this relationship just sour? Should I break it up and cut my losses, or try to mend it? Sincerely, Zeldaster

Hey, I am in a very similar predicament. I feel as if I know exactly how you. Your high days, your lows days. Do you feel as if just being around her makes you feel better? My answer to you is this. You have 2 obvious choices. Tell her how you feel, or don't. There is no way around those two. Any plan that you may think of, no matter how intricate, ends with these two choices. Red Pill, Blue Pill? While I didn't say that if you never tell her, she won't fall in love with you. Unfortunately, you may feel as if you need to make a decision now. Final Advice: Don't trust fate. My Opinion, ~Zeldaster~

Hey, While this may be difficult to understand, I think it should be heard. Porn, and every branch of it, is entirely fantasy. It is merely to make men imagine things that they would not have access to in real life. Most likely, it is to relieve sexual tension. Think about it- who visits porn sites most? Teenagers. Why? Because they have a lot of hormones, and no way to "relieve" themselves. And as Ash said, men live two different lives. He doesn't want you to become a sex goddess. He wants your companionship and love. While some of the things in the post may not apply to him, for men, sex of any type is a basic instinct (like the movie!). So, most likely, he still loves you as much as ever, and you should NOT change. My Opinion, ~Zeldaster~

thats all... just enjoy, and get ready for a wonderful life of... PAIN AND SUFFERING... just remember... GIRLS ARE CRUEL PEOPLE... haha...

if you think you are chicken**** just becuase of that, i'd hate to see you when you really do something stupid...

Acually, I don't think you should be dating girls you just met. Anyway, I have one piece of advice: No. You shouldn't. Even if you gety a date (unlikely) it'll probably be uncofortable. And remember... GIRLS ARE CRUEL PEOPLE... haha...

well, uh, be careful, girls are...odd. Hell, for all you know, she could have smiled to play ya', cause thats how she gets her kicks. It's a possibility. Not trying to be a downer, but... GIRLS ARE CRUEL PEOPLE... haha...

actually, when i think i should end my life, i just think about all the people i need to beat down before i die, and the list gets longer everytime. it's true...

beer googles...lol...

Dear Mostly Swing Fox, and Caliboy, While the situation between the woman and getting back together, and I think it's good to share it, it's not helping. You saying that gives hope to people like me and Always Hopeful (irony, eh?), usually causing more problems. While your intentions are good, you should consider that. I tried pretty hard, and while I didn't go to the internet for help, some might. I'm just trying to prevent this situation from happening to other, and your not helping. I release you are trying to prove a point, but it's completely ruining my point. While you may give hope to one person, and they and there ex get back together, many others will try and fail. All of this on your words. While I understand people may give up a possible relationship reading my post, I think it will help many others. Oh, and she did notice my change in behavior, and was actually more confortable with me! Sincerely, ~Zeldaster~

So, you got dumped by a girl, and you still like her. Sounds familiar. Well, I have no idea if this is helpful, but I thought I'd share it. So, I was dumped by I girl I thought I loved. It crushed me for a few weeks, mabey even a month. I became very closed to all emotions, not wanting it to happen again. After about 5 months, we were still friends, in my hopes for another relationship with her. I was pathetic. I bent over backwards for her, treated her like a princess. I wanted to be with her again. Then, after more months, I started to notice other girls. Then I finnally admitted to myself that I liked another girl. It was great! After a few days, I started treating her like a regular person. It felt great. Now I am in another happy relationship. The moral to this long and boring story is that, if you still like a girl after she dumps you, you must get over it. I know how hard it is, but you have to. Thats it, the end. Trust me, I have never felt anything for the first girl again. Sincerely, ~Zeldaster~