baldo

There's a girl at my university library who I've become quite keen on. It's just lust really and I don't even know if she's even noticed me yet. I would like to chat to her and learn a little about her though, even if she's not interested - just to prove it to myself. I decided this year that I'm going to be fearless, but how do you speak to someone you've never met and know nothing about without seeming like some weirdo?

hmmm, maybe

you're probably right actually

what's the difference?

There's a girl I've really liked for some time in my office - and I mean really liked. Trouble is I heard she's not really that interested. This was six weeks ago, but since then we've started to get on much better. Next Friday we've got a night out with everyone from the office going and I really want to tell her how I feel without a) embarrassing her or me and b) getting too drunk and spluttering it out. Thing is, I don't feel like I've properly been myself around her at work and outside of that office atmosphere I feel I can loosen up and be myself much more. I'm not looking to jump into bed with her and leave it at that. This is a girl I'd really love to get to know. I just wanted to know what you guys thing. Should I pursue it slightly further or should I respect her original decision. If I should think 'to hell' and go for it, how can I do it subtly without seeming desperate and hanging around her all night like a bad smell. Any advice, as always, is much appreciated.

What do other people reckon? It's at the stage right now where I can't eat and sleep - I know it sounds pathetic and I need a bit of perspective as there are worse things in the world but I like the girl so much. I suppose it's because I've seen a couple of false dawns where I think I have a chance of going out with her but then it turns to dust. I just really need to explain to her that if she gave me a chance and we could go out just the two of us I'm confident she may see me differently and we could hit it off, not least as I'd feel much more confident away from the office. If she did give me this opportunity and still wasn't interested at least I'd known I could move on knowing that I'd brought a sense of closure to it. We're having an office night out this weekend so I may get a chance to chat to her...or, if it isn't too soon, tell her how strongly I feel about her. Any advice is, as always, much appreciated. Thanks guys.

won't that just scare her? I can't be too persistent. I can't afford to get a reputation.

I've liked her for quite a while now and a few weeks ago, I asked her out (probably too soon cos I hadn't established much of a friendship or anything with her). She was like'...errrm... yeah, possibly'. Then my idiot mate - against my wishes - asked her mate if I stood a chance (typical maths class stuff) to which she said probably not. However, lately we've been getting on much better and are going out as a department next week. Do you think I should try again or die wandering? Also, if the former how do I do it without coming accross as a desperate. I don't generally go back for a second knock back. I can't be seen to come accross as desperate!

I really want to talk to her and at the age of 27 you'd think I wouldn't be like this but it's so difficult. She gets on at the stop after me and it's quite a busy train so it's not like we can talk at the station in a small talk kind of a way. What I'm really asking I guess is how do you break the ice without sounding like a social outcast? If this is a subject that's been covered before in a similar case can someone also please point me in the direction. Cheers

She said she'd like to go out sometime with me, but wasn't specific. This was at lunchtime and we barely spoke for the rest of the day. I then wasn't in on Friday What to do? Should I remind her on Monday or let her come to me? I don't want to be forceful, but then, like me, I think she's a bit shy too... Any advice much appreciated.

I really like this girl but the problem is I work with her. I fear rejection at the best of times, but it's worse when you work with the person. I try to have at least one lengthy-ish conversation with her each day, but if I do this too much i risk entering the friends zone. I don't want to take a step back cos i don't wanna be forgotten. I need to find a balance and a subtle way of finding if she has a bf. Any advice? Cheers

haven't tried yet, not seeing her til Saturday night.. Any pearls in the meantime much appreciated!

thanks for the advice guys. And zpivat, that's great, I'll be sure to try that. By the way, do you know how I can ask her out in Slovakian? Any simple-ish way of saying 'fancy coming for a drink/meeting up some time' without making a complete fool of myself. Any help much appreciated. Ta

Want to ask a Slovakian girl out. She's a friend of a friend. This is my plan. When I next see her, I'm going to surprise her by greeting her in Slovakian. This will make her think I'm kinda cute, then later on in the day having chatted a bit more, I'm going to ask her to go for a drink (again, in Slovakian). What do you think? It's not completely fool proof as I can't for the life on me find how to ask someone out for a drink in Slovakian (any help on this also welcome) Cheers

Ok, please stick with me on this. There's a girl in my office who I have really taken a shine too. Similar personality and I think she'd be ideal for me. The only trouble is that although she's in the next dept to me and sits behind me and we occasionally say hello and have brief chats, I have numerous concerns. First of all being an office relationship and working at such close quarters rejection would be unbearable. I know i shouldn't look at it like that but it would be. Secondly I once asked a friend of hers out and was turned down so that makes me feel worst. Last of all, I get very few chance to talk to her, despite where we sit. As she's on a different dept it's difficult to involve her. One idea would be to talk to her about vacations because we've both been to the same place in the past year. How do I just go up and start a random conversation though? It's a chance I don't want to miss, but then I don't know how to go about it without seeming a freak show. It's not easy with me being quite a shy person, but I'm 25 and haven't been out with anyone in 3 years. If anyone could offer some advice I'd be most grateful. Thanks