KristyK

OK, so I met this guy about a month and a half ago at my work...he's a customer. We started talking whenever he would come in, he invited me to a party at his place that I couldn't make it to. Well he came in today and we were chatting about the usual stuff and I mentioned I lost a phone number he gave me for a store, and that I was going to call him to get the number, but I didn't have his. So we talked for a bit more, he didn't even end up buying anything...and then he gave me his number and told me to call him if I "needed the number to the store...or anything"...and before he left he said "you should stop by for a beer sometime". I'm very interested in this guy, but don't like the pressure of me having to call him. I should have given him my number too...why didnt he ask? Well I guess I get the impression he's a little shy. Anyways, so should I call him and ask him for drink sometime this week...or is there a better approach? Or does anyone have a better suggestion? I don't want him to think I got the wrong impression if he was just looking for friendship and isn't really interested. I've never done this in my life and it's scary

Ok, so this may be a really dumb question...but yesterday a guy came into my work...I've talked to him twice before for all of 5 minutes total...and yesterday he came in to get something and when he done he said "I'm kind of having a housewarming party on Friday if you want to come (or "you should come")" or something along those lines.... The way he said it was so cute He then introduced himself, I introduced myself...we chatted for a little, he reminded me about the party, then he left. I kind of get the feeling he's interested in me, but I am so dumb when it comes to this stuff.... Opinions?

If you shave it all off....doesn't it get uncomfortable when it starts to grow back? And how often do you do it?

Hmmm...what am I afraid of...? I honestly don't know...I guess it's just out of my comfort zone...like I said I am really pretty shy! I am a cute girl, and I don't think he's out of my "league"...I know I have nothing to lose by saying hi...guess the worst thing that could happen would be he says hi but is not interested in conversation...I don't know. I need to start taking risks! Nice risk eh...saying hi to a guy... Oh well, we'll see.

Hey everyone....well, he wasn't there today...so I couldn't do it I am a very shy person and this is very hard for me to do, especially with him being so cute Everytime I think about doing it in the day I feel like I can, but when it comes down to it, I don't know if I will be able to. I don't even know if he has a gf...but there's nothing wrong with saying hi. If I turn the situation around, I know that I would love it if a cute guy came up and said hi to me... I guess I'm just looking to be told guys would like it too and not find it weird. Thanks for the advice..now to work up the guts to do this.

OK guys...question: how would you feel if a girl came and talked to you out of the blue? There is a really cute guy that waits at my bus stop after work...I've only seen him there for about a week and a half, and not everyday (I THINK he might be new...). I catch him looking at me, and he catches me looking at him. I would love to talk to him, but not sure if it would freak him out or something. Whatare your thoughts? Thanks so much

That's fine...I had lost interest in him until his latest comment of "I like older girls"...and all I meant by hang out sometime was just that. He was new to town and didn't seem to have many friends. Well I'm not disappointed by your reactions to this... we will see what happens today....

I've posted before about my sitaution with a guy who works in my town. I thought he was interested in me from little things that he'd done (see other posts), so I said "we should hang out sometime" to him and he said "ya...we'll see". That was totally unexpected but I didn't let it get the best of me and I would still see him at his work. About a week or two after that incident, he came to my work and we were just chatting about the weekend and stuff and he said to me "I really need some new girls to hang out with"...now I should have said something but in my head I was thinking "you had your chance, I suggested that last week...". So I didn't say anything...maybe that was a mistake. Do you think he was trying to redeem himself from before? Many times he has come in and asked when am I off work and what was I doing after, but he's never asked me to do anything after when I tell him I'm not doing anything. Anyway, the latest confusing piece of this game that I have is last week I went to see him and he told me his birthday was next week and I told him mine was the following week. He asked how old I was going to be, and I said "older than you" and he said he knew I was older but how old was I going to be....so I told him...reluctantly...and he said "that's ok, I like older girls"...now tell me...is THAT interest???? He appologized for not coming to see me at work when he said he would but he had to do stuff for his family, but when was I working this weekend and he would come in and visit. Now I'm tired of these games and just want SOMETHING to happen...does he sound interested?

I did 9 and a half....

I'm in a similar situation myself except I asked the guy "out"...well, to "hang out" anyway, which I thought was a way to be casual about it. He sent the same msgs this girl was sending to you (flirting, asking questions about me, showing up at my work, etc...which may have been HIS way of being friendly, but I took for interest)...and as soon as I go for it , he says "ya...we'll see..." I know how you're feeling with the rejection thing, but I am not going to let this get the best of me. I will keep talking to him and treating him like a friend as if nothing happened...his loss anyway! That's the way you have to think...her loss! There IS someone better out there!

I appreciate everyone's input...but to be quiet honest, I did not see what I did as asking him out. He has given me lots of hints that he's interested and whenever I saw him on a Friday or Sunday and asked what he was up to/how was your weekend....he would ALWAYS say he had no plans/it was boring and he did nothing (I felt it was hinting)...thats why I decided to say "well we should hang out sometime" beause it flowed with the conversation. I didn't say anything specific or make specific plans, just a suggestion. Now it's out there. He has only 1 friend he hangs out with...so I thought it would be fun to have someone else to hang out with, and see where it goes! Yes, I could have mistaken his friendlyness for "interest", but he could have mistaken my friendlyness as "asking out". I'm not going to let this get the best of me....I will keep going to his work and acting friendly like nothing happened. Yes, I could have waited for him to ask me to "go out" if he WAS interested, but I don't want to sit around waiting for that. I just hope he doesn't start avoiding me now!

Well I did it....I got a "ya...we'll see..." Gimme a break! Oh well....I tried....no regrets eh

So....how did it go?

Just ask her if she wants to hang out sometime...for real! It sounds casual if she's not interest!

Would you ever just flat out say "no" if asked that? That's what I'm afraid of. I don't really mind if it goes anywhere or not, I would be happy with friends. He is attractive, but I don't really KNOW him...just in passing.

Just wondering how you guys would feel if a girl you knew as an acquaintance (talk maybe once a week) asked you to hang out sometime? Like, she askes what you're up to this weekend, you say you have no plans and she says "we should hang out sometime". Would you assume she was interested, or just friendly? Thanks

I would just say how the session went really well...try to get some convo going, and then say "we should hang out sometime" and see her reaction...be ready to suggest something

Tough situation, VERY similar to mine! When I was 16 I met a guy on line in a chat room...we emailed every so often, built a relationship and became best friends. I started developing feelings for him after almost a year of talking, but kept it to myself...then one day he wrote me an email telling me how he felt, and it was the same as me. We had a long distance relationship for 9 years! I live in Canada, he lives in the US...and it is HARD!!!!! We actually just broke up....it gets expensive, and it was getting very one sided...I was always going down there and he was never coming here. It can work...but you are very young and it is very expensive. You will only be able to see each other a few times a year, and saying goodbye to the person you love is the HARDEST thing ever! I believe you should be honest and tell her, because I don't regret my 9 years (we are still best friends), just know what you are getting into, should a relationship evolve.

anyone else???

Thanks...that's what I was hoping to hear...I think I will go for it! I went into work today and I thought if he came in today (since I told him I would be there on SUnday) that it would be a sign he was interested...and he did come in...one of the first customers! I asked him wasn't he supposed to be working, and he said he was but he got his brother to watch the store so he could come in a buy some stuff! Sounds like a good sign to me! So what...ask him if he wants to hang out sometime? We chatted for a little while, and I asked him how his weekend was and he said "boring" and I asked what he did last night and he said "nothing"...so if he doesn't do much on the weekends, and he's not interested, it could sound like just wanting to hang out casually right....? Thanks everyone.

I just wanted some input on two recent situations that happened with the guy I like...I won't get into entire conversations, just keep it brief The other day I had to stop at the mall on my way home from work because my ride needed to pick up some stuff. I said I would wait in the car. We were parked in one of the end spaces in the rows of parking spots, and I saw the guy I like's car parked right near by. Well I saw him come out of the store and go to his car, but whenever I looked at him, he was just looking away from me...so I didn't get to wave, but I know he saw me (we kind of know each other from around town, just never formally introduced). Anyway, I saw him leave the mall and I thought that was that. Two minutes later he drives back into the mall and right past the car I was waiting in, he circled the row of cars and drove past me again...by this time my ride was back and putting stuff in the trunk and we were pulling out to leave and he was right behind us. We had one more stop to make on the way home, and instead of turning to go down the street where he lives, he turned and followed us to our next stop. We pulled onto the side of the road and I got out just as he was driving past, then he pulled a U-turn and drove past me again slowly and waved and then drove away. I don't know if that made any sense, but basically he drove back to the mall without stopping to go in anywhere, just circled twice and then followed us to the next place, pulled a U-turn, waved and drove away, without stopping to go in the place... The next incident was two days later when I stopped by where he works. We were just chatting about the weather, all normal stuff. I said to him "hey, you got your hair cut!" and he said "ya" and I said "looks good!" and he said "I did it yesterday...no the day before...." and I said "oh ya, I saw you up there" (at the mall) and he said "you did? I didn't see you....oh wait....were you in a red car....?" and I said "ya...my ride's car" and then he asked me what my name was and I asked him and so on. We chatted a bit more and I asked what he was up to this weekend and he said "nothing....how about you....?" and I said "not much...just work on Sunday" and he asked if it was at the store and I said ya...and then a customer came so I kind of had to go. I felt like we could have kept talking though, if it wasn't for that customer! Now I don't want to read too much into 2 situations, but does it sound like there's a chance he might be interested...or just having friendly conversation? I was outright flirting when I told him his hair looked good, I felt like he was trying to play it cool when he said he didn't see me, but then he did, and then right after that he asked my name...I don't know what to think...any input? Thanks

I don't think it is always looks that are the initial attraction. A lot of the time getting to know someone can make them become more attractive, even if there was no initial attraction...so it would be more based on personality. The guy the I am interested in right now is definitely not someone I would give a second glance to if I passed him in the street...really not the kind of guy I normally go for at all!!!! I had seen him around town for a few months and never thought twice about him, but then after talking with him a few times, one day I am totally in love with him (and he has no idea!). He holds a great conversation, he's very funny, very friendly and very interesting...it was after all this I THEN noticed how his eyes are the most amazing brown and how he has the cutest, shy, quirky kind of smile... So...yes looks can play a part....but getting to know someone you might not normally "go for" can change how you see them

Don't give up! I know exactly how you feel...believe me! You gave me some good advice the other day...and I think you shoud go for it. So what if she's not interested, at the very least you could make a new friend. As a shy girl, I think I would feel pretty uncomfortable with a guy coming up to me and just asking me to go for coffee or something...I would much rather it start by saying "Hi" a few times, introductions, conversation and then maybe coffee. Small steps...but you have nothing to lose. I'm struggling with the same situation, so its easy for me to sit and tell you what I would want, cuz thats what I want the guy I'm interested in to do....the eye contact, the hello's...it's hard, but you can do it!

Oh my gosh Ginger25, that is exactly what I do! I posted about a guy I am interested in at work, and I want to look at him and smile and such, but whenever I see him I think "oh my gosh, there he is, look away"...well I'm never going to attract him if he thinks I'm ignoring him....

Ok, so here's the deal. There is a guy at my work I am very interested in, but I am so very shy! We don't work together, just in the same BIG office building. I usually see him in the morning when I come in and maybe another 1 or 2 times during the day if I go downstaires. We have never spoken, but I know he has seen me around. We have made eye contact quite a few times, but I never have enough to courage to smile at him...he must think I'm a real b**ch. Anyways, I decided that if I want anything to happen, even just a friendship, then I'm going to need to do something (I'm also new at work, so friends would be nice)...so I decided I would say "goodmorning" when I came in in the morning...the only thing is, he will NOT look at me! I get the feeling he knows I'm there...but he refuses to look on purpose. I was thinking about it, and I find that when I'm interested in someone I tend to do that too...pretend they're not there, because I'm so shy...but I think he's doing it to give me the message that he's not interested. The other day I decided that he is for sure not interested, with all the body language he is giving me (if we do happen to make eye contact, he doesn't ever smile at me, or he won't look when he knows I'm there...he could be standing 5 feet from me and not look over), so I decided to stop trying to say hi and stuff. Then, the very next morning I went in late, and it was just me and him passing each other, and he looked at me and we made eye contact, and then he looked away and I didn't say anything, it was the perfect opportunity I had been waiting for, but since I had decided to give up, I didn't say anything! I have seen him hanging out with 2 other guys sometimes, and both of them have checked me out, smiled, and said "hi" on more than one occasion...so why doesn't the one I'm interested in do that?? I hate being so shy....I mean what's the worst that could happen? I know I would be hurt if he wasn't interested, but at the very least, it would still be nice to make a new friend! I've thought about getting to know the 2 that actually DO smile and say hi to me, then I could meet this other guy. Anyway, guys....I should pretty much get the hint that either he's not interested, or has a girlfriend right (because he won't look or smile at me)....not that he's just shy? Any suggestions on how to go about this? Give up, or keep trying? Thanks so much, and any help is appreciated!