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AnotherBrokenDoll

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Everything posted by AnotherBrokenDoll

  1. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Thankyou so much blender for your kind words and i know what you mean. I want help more then anything i really do! But i cqnt seek it! My family would kill me if they found out. We arent close and they think that sort of thing is just stupid! Any councillors have to tell my mum and i dont need that right now! Im scared i dont want to die but sometimes id do anything to get out of here! Besides my i dont feel i deserve help. Why should i be helped im nothing!
  2. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Boy was i mistaken yesterday was bad today was worse. My ex decided 2 go and tell one of my friends bout my cutting and when i asked him why we had a fight and he ended up telling me to * * * * off. So now we arent talking. Oh and a new girl came into our group ripped us apart now we have separated into 3! Im trying to stay friends with everyone but half of them are angry because i followed my BEST friend when she walked off upset. Some think i have taken sides and are angry and some even think that i should take sides becuase this way is stupid!!! plus my grandparents that i live with want me and mum to leave. My family have banned me from ever trying to meet my father oh and on top of this all 7 of my friends are suicidal so i have to help them all! I just want for everything to be ok!
  3. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Today has been the worst day of my life! My boyfriend and i split up. It just wasnt working. I mean i think i'll always love him! But i just wasn't in love. Well it was all fine until i found out he was gonna dump me anyway. (that was fine his reason wasnt) He didnt want to be with me cuz he couldnt stand the * * * * that i give. By that he means me cutting myself. I thought when you loved someone you stuck by them, you arent ment to hurt them. So now im all alone and to make it worse i didnt just loose a boyfriend i lost a best friend. Oh well two best friends actually. Now one of the people who i was so close to, she welcomed me into her house, her parents were mine, she hates me because i went out with him she hates me because she thought i was shoving into her face the hole time i was with him (she really liked him) But i wasnt, i never did i was even gonna dump him because i didnt want to hurt her! I love her so much she is like my sister but she hates me. Now i have nothing... Whats the piont of going on???? Life is meaningless all it does is hurt and haunt you! My life has been ruined in one simple day....
  4. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Thanks shysoul but i cant talk to a councillor my family just cant find out! I dont tell my family bout my life as far as they know im a problem child. I wish things could go back to the way they were when i was young and rieve.... They were the days!
  5. AnotherBrokenDoll
    I cant go to councilling my family cant find out what im doing! I'll be in so much trouble if they knew!
  6. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Im in need of help! I just want to tell someone everything i want them to listen! I need to get everything off my chest but i cant! I dont have anyone who can really listen and the people who will i keep pushing away! Its like my life has gone from bad to worse! My friends are telling me who i am when they dont even know because i haven't been me really for years! I hurt myself all the time i deserve it. Im not good enough for anyone! I just want to be proud of myself again i want people to see me again but i cant let people see that! Im so scared of getting hurt i put on an act for almost everyone! This life is so bad i just want to get out. The people i care about are getting hurt by me and the peple who dont care are changing me. Im fading away into something im not and something i dont want to be! I used to want to be a good person now i want to be perfect i feel forever dissappointed in myself. Why cant i just be me????
  7. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Hey! I very highly doubt that she would love you any less and also i think she would know you didnt mean to hurt her! She may have been hurt when you said that but you had to do it! If you hadnt then anything could have happened! Dont worry to much about it because im pretty sure she understands! love always rozi!
  8. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Ok i gave it time i talked to him about my fears and still the same things happen! I dont know what to do!
  9. AnotherBrokenDoll
    I know it must be hard having this disorder. I have been in hospitals so much i feel at home in there because of a disorder but really is anything worth hurting yourself for? I know you think i have no idea what you are going through but believe me i do understand! Trust me one day the right person will find you. Besides people aren't as shallow as they seem to be. Once you stop doubting yourself others will to! Hang in there and talk to people about this!
  10. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Never give up! You have been through a reough time but keep fighting! We are all here for you and we all want to help you let us! Just dont take your life! You say people will be devistated if you do this why hurt them when you could prove to everyone that you can do this! trust me life is to important to just be thrown away! Love can be tough but you can pull through this! If you can't stand the pain talk it out! Tell someone you trust, just let someone in. So many people love you dont hurt them because of a bad patch. I know you can get through this if you put your mind to it! good luck!
  11. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Hey you are such a great person to be doing all of this for your daughter! She is lucky to have a mother like you! All you can really do is be there for her! Listen to her when she needs to talk and let her understand that all you want is to help her! Its good to see your daughter has some one to care for her! I hope she gets better soon!
  12. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Look into my eyes, Tell me what you see. Is it happiness and joy? Or is it just not me? For on the outside, My face is full of laughter my heart full of love. But if you look more closely, You can really see, All the hurt and all the pain, That leaves behind its mark. When you're not around, My face is full of tears and my heart full of anger, My life empty of any love of joy, That lurks on the outside. So live one day as me, Then tell me who i am, Because no longer will you see, Who i used to be!
  13. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Great job! As shySoul said when you wright from yourheart you do it best!
  14. AnotherBrokenDoll
    That was an amazing poem! I can totally relate to it!
  15. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Great poem shy it really made me think about it! thanks!
  16. AnotherBrokenDoll
    It was awesum!
  17. AnotherBrokenDoll
    that is gorgeous!
  18. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Im a clingy one to! My bf loves to spend time with his mate and with all my girl friends but he doesnt realise how much that hurts me! Give it some time i id and well he still isnt holding me all the time but its alot better now! I have always needed peoples touch to feel loved and their time but you have to compremise if they arent huggy and you are give him a bit of pace not to much or he'll think something id wrong but a little bit! He is sure to come and give you more attention! goodluck!
  19. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Thanks for all your kind words but i cant talk to my parents! My family is a disaster zone! As i said i dont know my dad, iv looked up where he lives and im trying to find enough courage to go and talk to him but he raped my mum and its his fault she has a mentle disorder his fault i feel like this i also live with my grandparents but i cant talk to them my grandad hates me and my nana thinks suicidal people are idiots! I am so sick of feeling like this my mum has told me she wishes i was never born because then her life would be great! It hurts me so much to hear that sure we fight and all but i would never say that to her no matter what happenes shes still my mother and il always love her but i dont feel that love back from anyone not even my boyfriend! I feel like as much as i love everyone else they dont love me! Plus i just found out my hole group at school is angry at me because i have been * * * * *y latelt. I wish they knew what was going on but how can i tell people who slap me for cutting myself instead of helping me! This is a cry for help i dont want to kill myself i love life but i cant stand this pain anymore!
  20. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Ok last night was a party and me and my boyfriend were both there and we were having a good time! It was a pool party so naturally we were in the pool and we found our own space and he started pashing me it! It was my first pash and i was totally scared but i thought if i kept doing it it would be fine but each time i got me and more freaked out! My mum has told me all these bad experiences about when someone raped her. Now im scared of getting to close to most guys! I know my boyfriend would never try to hurt me, but it doesnt stop me being scared! I want to stay a virgin until im married thats really important to me! So im scared of losing that and im scared of his touch practically now! When he was holding in the pool any interruption was welcomed and at one point i was silently begging him to leave me alone! I know pashing is just kissing but i cant help being scared i was so freaked out that when i got home i was crying so hard! Its so stupid but please how can i overcome this?
  21. AnotherBrokenDoll
    great job! I loved it! You really know how to get people hooked in!
  22. AnotherBrokenDoll
    Im so happy i asked him out again and he said yes! Thanks gor your advice! I really love this one
  23. AnotherBrokenDoll
    I just got a new boy friend and the last guy i went out with i dumped cuz i cant help it! Its like i cant trust anyone and to stop getting hurt i jst dont! My best friends know little about me and now i'm scared im going to loose him! I love him so much and for the last three years i have been heart broken cuz i neva thought he'd lyk me but now i have him by my side i never want him to go! But how can i trust him??? Please help me!
  24. AnotherBrokenDoll
    It was on the lips and i do like him but a five year friendship isnt something i want to loose and im so scared of being hurt!
  25. AnotherBrokenDoll
    ok darling listen up! I knda no wat ur going through one of my best friends tried to commit suicide the other night! It hurt me sooo deep down inside when i found out why but thats not what you need! All your sister needs is someone 2 listen to her! This is a big job cuz sometimes she will repeat herself and sometimes you will want to just throw something at her bcuz u just want her to understand but the main thing is that you do understand! A cry for help is very important! So please just talk to her listen to her dont treat her differently but be there for her! And if things get to hard talk to a professional cuz they can help! They know how to deal with these things! ok gud luvk and fill us in! love always rozi! always here if u need me
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