Is it okay to gradually phase friends out of your life rather than have some kind of official 'break up'?
There are 3 friends in particular (from when I was a teenager) who I've seen a lot less of over the last 7/8 years or so, we have very little in common anymore.
I also moved to a new city around 5 years ago, which is around a 90minute drive away. I see them around once a year these days, if that. They often want to hang out with me but I mostly just make out like Im too busy with other things.
I feel like they will never grow up. We are now in our mid thirties, and their main interests are just going out binge drinking or drinking at one of their houses in front of the TV.
They would often get quite jealous & bitter at the way I started going off and doing new things, finding new hobbies, meeting new people, and focusing on my career and fitness — generally just finding ways to better myself.
I sometimes feel like they were holding me back in life, they can often be quite narrow-minded, judgemental and immature. One of them in particular would often be quite toxic and nasty when we were in our 20s, and Ive never quite gotten over it.
They do have a nice side to them too, and they would happily drop everything in order to hang out with me... which is why I feel a little guilty
I feel it would be overkill to arrange some kind of 'serious talk' and officially end the friendship, I also dont think they would take it seriously, and would end up gossiping about me to other people about it.
I know of two other people who have distanced themselves from them... most likely for the exact same reasons I imagine.