Heid

Thank you for your advice, i really have to take a step back and reflect. Thank you

And he has improved massively! I'm just so invested with him and he with me that i don't want to end the relationship.

No, i work and i'm good with saving money. another issue in our relationship is his issues with money, he is Horrible with spending money, he would blow every penny if he wasn't with me. When we first met he didn't have a penny to his name, i helped him find a job at sea and taught him how to budget. I know i sound like i'm ringing my own bell here but its true.

Passive aggressiv is the perfect word to describe how he brings her up to me.

He also said to me when i had gone to the TV room to cool off, that if "i was gonna be like that" that he would just drink himself piss drunk. He has talked to me about having anger issues and i have done everything to support him when he goes into these moods, he has gotten so much better since we started dating. So i do have compassion for him and i know that he doesn't mean anything when he tells me that im an "idiot" and what not. He always cools off and comes and says sorry some time later.

Yes, but he just says that he doesn't have anything against her, and there is never a solution from him. I asked him to talk to her about things if he had something that was really bothering him

And i would like to say also that i was very respectful in the way i talked to him about this, i simply said to him that it affected me when he said these things. And i'm sorry for not giving more examples, these things kinda just blend together in my head, but this happens a lot

Oh, yeah i just meant it affects me a lot when i hear him say these things about her, she is the only family i have and i would love for him at least to respect that. I did not break up with him, and im not planning to, i love him very much. And yes he has been really quiet, i told him everything i had to say and he's just very stubborn and doesn't back down. He wouldn't even apologise for calling me an idiot last night..

I talked to him about getting a hotel or an apartment while he is here, and he doesn't want that. Do i just let him vent to my face, i have never seen anything my mother has done to warrant what he says.

Im sorry? what do you mean?

Im sorry but this is not the problem, we are young and are saving up to buy our own house, we don't want to rent, he is very comfortable here and has never complained..

We made the the choice together to move in with her, it is not me that is forcing him to stay here, we both feel it is best. What actions? i do nothing but love him. i Do not care more about my mother more than him, but she is still my mother and has done nothing but be kind enough to welcome us into her house. Ups and downs come with every relationship.. It's nothing that hasn't been worked out. I just want him to respect the relationship i have with my mother instead of make these petty comments to my face about her

Just things that don´t matter, it has happened so many time that its hard to remember all he has said. She treats him well and does nothing to warrant any of what is said we lived in another country before we moved in with her and he had never met her.¨ We live with my mother because he´s working most months out of the year and i´m going to school in the same city as my move lives.

That wasn't the dilemma i had, we live with her because i'm going to school in the country she lives in, and we are moving back to the country we originally lived in when i'm done with school.

Me and my fiancee have been together for 3 years now, we have had our ups and downs but have always been able to get through things, but this is something we can't seem to agree on. we just started living with my mother while I finish up school, he works as a fisherman on a boat abroad but comes home for a month every now and then. I love my mom and have always been very close to her as she was a single mom for all my life, but we have of course had our ups and downs as well. My fiancee will say things about her out of the blue every chance he gets, the final straw for me was last night when my mom was sleeping, he started vacuuming and I asked him to use a broom instead so that he wouldn't wake her up with the noise, he said in a very petty tone "it's not like she respects me when I'm trying to sleep in th morning" (i know this isn't that bad, but I had just had enough), I said to him that she should't have to whisper in her own home at 10 am (he is often asleep then). I told him that I'm so over him making these petty comments towards my mom, and he freaked out. This is not an isolated incident he keeps saying things like this towards my mom, and I just bite my tongue most of the time. I feel like I shouldn't be hearing this said about my mother from my soon to be husband, I wish he would respect me and my relationship with her, and either bring his concerns up with her or just not say anything at all as I wouldn't do any good anyway. I said all this to him and he just doesn't agree with me and it's become a problem now. Am I overreacting? am I being too sensitive about my mother? what can I do or say?