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CarolineAC's Achievements


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  1. I'm so sorry what an awful thing to do to someone. This is not at all your fault, no one would deserve something like this. Give yourself time to grieve. It's ok to cry, feel confused, angry, and every other emotion. Remember to do the little things to take care of yourself even if it feels difficult. Day by day it will get better, even if it is still hard now.
  2. If you are serious about wanting to fix your relationship, stop seeing the other woman in any capacity. Cut her out. If you can't do that, maybe it's time to think about what you want. If it's just about sex, seeing this other person is just a short term solution. If it's more than that you need to get on the same page with your wife. You married her for a reason, jumping ship on a relationship like that is rarely the right decision long term.
  3. Yes. He does absolutely does not care if someone doesn't agree with his opinion. He just doesn't know anything about weddings. I've walked him through it, his response was "honestly honey I don't care, but I would like x,y, and z." I asked him through the entire planning what he thought or if he didn't like something. This is not the issue.
  4. Yes, but he doesn't have a lot of opinions about it. When I ask him about it he usually responds "whatever you want to do" or "I don't care" (not rudely, just saying he doesn't have an opinion). But when he did want something, there was maybe one or two things, I made sure to include it. We have very open communication.
  5. I think it's ok to feel bothered. You probably need to have a conversation about it. Talk about what specifically bothers you and why, even of the why isnt so clear. Also consider some things that may help you feel better, maybe ordering more at a time so she won't be over so often. Or agreeing to talk about what they talked about outside even if it was only for a couple of minutes. Even asking what he considers their relationship, friends, acquaintances, or maybe just a stranger who delivers things. Just be sure not to interrogate or unnecessarily accuse. He should be respectful of your feeling uncomfortable in this situation even if he doesn't 100% understand. If he doesn't understand, try to stay calm and explain how you are feeling and how his reaction is making you feel. I'm no expert, but I hope you can get this figured out.
  6. I want to get married, that's not what this is about. I love my fiance and I can't wait for him to be my husband. I didn't want a big wedding and he was willing to compromise, although he wants a big one in the future. So I started planning a small only direct family event of 9 people total. I've been telling everyone that I want to keep it simple. The ceremony, pictures, and a home cooked meal. No decorations, or favors, or gifts. I was expected to plan everything, which was fine in the beginning. But as time went on each of our mothers and sisters started to add things with the phrase "but it's whatever you want" at the end. But no matter what I've told them, they are determined to add the things that I dont want and they want me to be actively involved in planning the things I don't want. It's gotten to a point that I'm not excited anymore, I'm stressed and unhappy and would rather stay home. Everything is already paid for (we are renting a small farmhouse Thursday through Sunday). In addition I recently purchased a house where my fiance and I live. His parents, who live out of state wanted to come a little early to see the house. Come to find out it's a week early and "they don't want to stay in a hotel" even though I have told them before they are welcome to visit anytime, but our house is small and not in good condition (we are mid renovation). I told my fiance that this made me uncomfortable and I was pretty much vetoed. I had taken off extra time from work to spend with him specifically since I knew the wedding would be stressful or me. This vist overlaps all of it. Any time the conversation with anyone goes towards the wedding I've started to respond "I don't have a preference" or "you can do that if you want" and try to change the subject. I've realized it's not really for me anymore and I can't get out of it. I will likely have no time alone, even at home since the only interior door in the house is the bathroom due to the renovations. I'm so uncomfortable I don't want to stay in my own home when they are here. I've even considered reducing my time off work so I stay busy, although I do work from home, and again, we have no doors. I'm stressed, overwhelmed with anxiety, and falling into a depressive pit. My fiance sees this and I have been open about how this is affecting me, although I don't think he understands the extent. How can I make it through this week and the wedding when I'm dreading it all of it?
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