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Janicejaplin

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  1. Now I am just in touch with this guy. Because he has been my friend for years and years. But he started behaving like that some years ago and I cant accuse him of liking me or having an attraction toward me if he doesnt I just dont like the touching and I told him but he keeps doing it. But we are long time friends m and we have a group of friends. I am not going to ruin our friendship as a group.
  2. No. Just if the person likes me and gets physical or too demanding of my attention. But I only feel this if I dont like the person because if I like them I am too intense myself.
  3. I dont think it is because you are less attractive. I usually (almost all the time) don't get any attention from dirty men on the streets (which I am really thankful for) but really men dont even look at me because I look too young. I am 23 but I look 15. I even got told I looked 13. Like my body in general is not that interesting to look at. I usually get attention from men who weirdly kind of fall in love with me. But the times it happened I felt this violent feeling. So.. I dont think it is because you are less attractive.. maybe it has to do with the vibes yo give off or because you look older therefore people respect you more. I dont know but we should feel lucky lol
  4. Yes!! I TOTALLy relate. The feeling is overwhelming violent. I remember one of the boys that liked me was from college. And I remeber seeing him at the distance arriving to class and as I watched him walk I wanted to hit him really hard and the thought of it satisfied me. This guy was specially disrespectful. He hugged me and once he complemented my ass and got sexual (he told me this by facebook) I dont know how I could have reacted in person. I think I would have murdered him hahahahah.
  5. I know people here are not phycologists but I was wondering why I feel this. Everytime someone I dont like like me and that person acts on their feelings, I feel disgusted and full of hatred and anger as if I wanted to punch that person in that face to stop being so annoying with me. It happened to me 3 times. 3 people that like me acted on their feeling in the sense that they managed to hug me. I hate the touchy part because somehow they feel with the right to touch me. And I dont know if my reaction of wanting to freaking rip their face off is normal. Currently I have a male friend who I dont really know if he likes me or not but I think it is pretty obvious he feels a certain attraction towards me. He all the times hugs me and touches me and grabs me by the shoulders. He acts in a protective way for example if I am crossing the street and a car is near me he softly pushes my back so I hurry up. Or the other day I was near a dog which was going to bark at me and he agaim grabbed me by my back to avoid that. One of my friends asked me if he liked me because he noticed the attention he gave me. It can be my own imagination but he doesnt act like that with ANYONE else and I dont know why but it ***ing annoys me. I want to slap him really hard so he would stop me touching me. I already told him he was to intense and I used the excuse of covid to keep my distance from him but still he manages to touch me and I hate it. I dont know it it is normal. When I like someone I am just as intense as him. I want to touch the person all the time.
  6. I think I suffer from BDD but I was never diagnosed because at least my therapists never focused on my severe low self steem. I am better now than I was before where my life completely focused on seeing surgeons, dermatologists and dentists to fix my flaws. Now I am still insecure but I kind of learnt to cope with it or got accostumed to it. This started when I was 16 and has been going for the past 7 years. I talked to 4 terapists and took medicine for more than 1 year to relieve my symptoms (this was when I was really really depressed about my looks) but as I tell you at least in my country BDD is not well known. None of my terapists mentioned that disorder and told me I had a serious issue about my appearence even when I told them I wanted to burn my lips or fantasize to inject oil in my face to make it fuller. They told me to "change" my looks, that I should try changing my hair style and plucking my eyebrlws or things like that. I just gave up. I try to find comfort on internet and forums such as this. And people around me dont take me seriously and when I open up and talked about this disorder called body dismorphic disorder, my friend cracked up so I just shut up and never talked about this again. It is useless.
  7. Even if I try to improve myself I will still have the same body. A child-lime body and face. So there is really no make up or clothes that help with that. It is like a really young teenager or child dressing and getting her hair done.
  8. I feel like I will never be able to have a healthy relationship with a guy because I am too insecure and jealous. I am all the time thinking he is talking to other girls or he finds other girls more attractive than me and that he is gonna leave me. Everytime I am scrolling on instagram or twitter and I see beaufitul girls I instantly think what he will think if he saw her. He would fall in love with her because she is prettier than me. It is the worst feeling in the world. It doesn't matter the skin color of the girl or the weight. Like... i am really skinny, white and I look like a 15 year old although I am 23. And everytime I see a girl tanner I feel bad because she looks nothing like me. Everytime I see a girl curvier than me I feel bad. If I see a girl with plumper lips I feel bad because I have really thin lips. IF i see a girl with long straight hair I feel bad. Even If I see girls who somehow resemble me because they are skinny I still feel they are prettier than me. I never had a boyfriend I just dated a guy for some months and I was really jealous about every girl he followed (which are a Loooooot). And I compared myself to all of that girls. He told me he was in love with a friend of his, that girl was skinny and had light brown skin. Really big lips and teeth. Nice smile and really long black hair. I felt terrible when I saw her because I felt awful. His ex girlfriend is a bombshell. Green eyes, really curvy body and has plenty of men fall for her. Every girl he liked is beautiful and I feel like ***. One of my friends even flirted with him (even though I introduced him to her) and he didnt do anything with her, but told me he was pretty and she looked like ramona flowers. This girl makes me feel bad because she is pretty and has a really curvy body. She is tall and white and has big eyes. He definitely doesnt have a type of girl. I think he likes a lot of girls. He basically likes everyone. But I dont know how to stop feeling like *** and comparing myself to every girl everytime I like someone.
  9. I am 23 years old and I never had a boyfriend. I never dated anyone and I never kissed anyone. I met a guy back in december and we started talking. After 1 week I was in love with him. This guys was my sister's ex boyfriend's cousin so I knew who he was and back then I was never really interested in him. I just a few times checked his instagram but I didn't think anything of him like I dont remember but I think I didn't even him attractive. I didn't stalk him that much. But he started following on december 22, last year. Almost 5 months. He started replying to my stories and we started chatting everyday just really short conversations and then it became more and more intense. We greeted each other in the morning and said really romantic stuff. On january I saw him for the first time because I arranged a friends meeting with him because I am too anxious and I wasnt prepared to meet him alone. The thing is I saw him like 6 times. 3 of them a friend of mine was with us because of my anxiety. Then he started a new job and barely talked to me. He said he was really busy. He told to meet 3 different times and I made excuses because of a bunch of things (I am shy and have anxiety so I still dont knlw how to deal with the situation of hanging out alone and him wanting to kiss me which is totally normal and I was also really mad at him for not talking to me for days, for not talking to me like we used to do. I never understood that sudden change not even now). After the 3r time I cancelled he of course didnt insist anymore excepto for some times he hinted he wanted to see me. Our relationship became weaker and weaker. And a few days ago (I am really trying to summarize all of the things that happened) I told him I wanted to see him but it was okey if he didnt. And he did not reply, he ignored me. He saw the message but ignored me. And 1 day later he replied to a random story I posted as if the other message I sent him was unexistant. I feel sad.. he is and was my first real love ever. The first guy I fell in love with and now everything is over. He doesnt want to be with me anymore. He must be knowing other girls because really his followers are going up like foam and he is following a lot of people. His number increased a lot. The thing about this guy is that he appeared in an awful moment of my life. My mum had 3 strokes the past 7 months. The last one she had was 3 months ago and I was the only one in charge of taking her of her. Taking care of the house. I couldn't even hang out with my friends at night because my mum was scared of being left alone at night. And all of that kind of made me fall into depressiom because my life was really monotone and I was thankful as hell my mum survived and is really really good now although she is really dependent on me. And when he appeared in my life it kind of made me feel something I never felt. A feeling I wasn't acquainted with. I remember I spent new year in the hospital with my mum because she had had her 3rd stroke a day before so she had to be admitted. I remeber being there with my mum in the room waiting for 2021 and as he started to follow me on december 22. He just had been talking for 1 week. I remember I wished him a happy new year. I felt butterflies in my stomach when I talked to him. I got really fond of him and he is a really gold person. I dont know if I will ever be able to be with someone else and not think of him..
  10. I met a guy in december and dated him for 3 months or less. We saw each other in person like 6 times. The first time I saw him was in a friends meeting. And then we had tea and went for a walk and then breakfast. Afterwards everything just was ruined. He started being distant when it came to talking and chatting because he was busy with a new job and I was really discouraged about that. I really like chatting and going from chatting everyday to barely a few minute conversation was awful. He still wanted to see me and told me to come to see me and I made up and excusa. A couple of weeks after I sent him a photo of my bedroom because I cleaned it and made some redecoration and he told me he wanted to see my bedrom and told me to come visit me at my house on a wednesday and I kind of an excuse when that day came. He told me to meet me on sunday then and on sunday I cancelled again After that he didnt ask me out again and barely talked to me. Like never. I Started talking to him weeks later and he took forever to reply. Sometimes he would just double check. But he would reply to some of my stories with heart emojis. A week ago I dyed my hair red he told me he wanted to see me. And I ignored that message and stroke another conversation and he literally double checked me for days. I asked him why he ignored me as a joke and he said he had unistalled instagram which I find weird but I know it is true because he showed no activity at all. Now, like currently he never sees my stories. Never. I told him yesterday I wanted to see him and he didnt reply and he was online multiple and multiple times. He is ignoring me. He doesnt even see me stories. I dont know if he is hurt if he is not interested anymlre. Or the most probable that he is meeting another girl and wants to do things right and sees me as an obstacle so he is avoiding me because is in interested in another girl.
  11. Block him and delete him from your life really. He doesnt deserve you. Do shouldnt be wasting your time and life with such a douchebag. Like really you should work on your self steem. It must be really low for you to keep having feelings for someone who treats you like this. Respect and love yourself woman
  12. Yes. I knle that. The guy was interested in me. Because although two of my friends (the one I talked about in thos forum) and another one who literally said she liked him the first time he saw him, he still pursued me and said he wanted me. But I dont care about him, this thread was never about him but my friend's because she is the one I care about and I was hurt by her attitude. If you re-read I never talked about the guy's reaction because again I dont care. It was about my friend who didn't have to behave like that. But okay. Anyway thank you for reading my post and replying.
  13. Is that really your vision of life? I dont think it is my fault at all. Simplt for one reason I would NEVER do something like that to a friend who is knowing a guy she is intered in. I would never. It is called respect. It is called being a good friend. Do you really think I need to avoid introducing guys I like to my "friends" for fear they would try to steal it for me? That is not something a friend would do. That is something an enemy would do. That is what the word friend is for. Someone who is loyal to you. And I know that for sure because again I would NEVER play dirty on my friend. I would never do the things she did to me because I know it is not right and I dont freaking need a reason to ruin her relationship because I want her to be happy that is why I am her FRIEND. I totally suppose you are man. Otherwise I dont understand your way of thinking. You are the typical guy who blames other girls for being beaten up by their boyfriend. Otherwise I dont really understand why you would blame me for my friend's trashy attitude but whatever. Hope you change your mind
  14. I mean. I dont really think she wanted to date him. I think she would never do that because we are almost fsisters. I think it was something narcicistic. Like she wanted him to like her. I still love her and I am not seeing this guy anymore. It didnt work out. Just different personalities.
  15. I will try to summarize so that it isn't too long and boring. I am a 23 year old female and I never dated a guy in my life. I started talking to a guy and instantly felt attracted to him. I have social anxiety so when I told him I wanted to meet him I organized a meeting with my friends so that we wouldnt have to be alone. Among my friends was my best friend who is also 23 years old. The thing is. This guy told me to hang out again and drink some tea and again I asked him to bring my best friend (my bad) because I talked to him about my anxiety. He was fine with it. The thing is I started noticing attitudes from my friend that I didnt like. Things such as her talking a lot about herself, making herself look cool, saying she lived in different countries and the things she studied. She even shared him a piece of cake with the same fork she was using... I was like... that too intimate. And it was our second time meeting him. In that same meeting she invited him to ride bikes sometime because both of them love riding. And when we were alone (my and my friend) she told me if I was fine with her inviting him to that thing. She told me to be homest with her because she didnt want "problems" and i didnt want to act toxic so I said it was fine. Then I encouraged her to follow him on instagram because she didnt knle how to arrange and plan this meeting and when I told her follow him on instahram she acted kind of "shy" and said "I feel embarrased". And I was like ehy would you feel embarrased? It is just a random guy I LIKE. Others things she did include (this happened once they followed each other on social media) was replying to one of his stories saying she didnt understand his joke and asked him to make an instagram poll. When I saw that the first I thought was. You shouldnt be texting him. It really seems she wanted something to strike a conversation eith him and I know I may sound toxic but I cant help it. She also arranged with him to come visit me to my house as a surprise. She told him that they could buy some snacks and visit me. And it may have been a good intention but the first thing I thought was like.. really you want to meet him just alone? I mean like I dont really find the point in her organizing a secret visit to my house both of them. Like.. to buy the snacks you are supposed to meet alone and talk and stuff.. again I feel she tried to find and excuse to meet him. I once asked her if she found him attractive and she kind of smirked and said he is not ugly. But well.. what do you think? Do I look like a psychopath? Haha.
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