DarkCh0c0

He got himself in a rut, but that's his choice for now. It doesn't mean that we should slam him this bad on it. The guy is suicidal fgs.

You can bring up the topic of help in another conversation like other posters mentioned. However, if he refuses to consider any help, at some point you will need to assess this relationship's viability.

Seriously. We don't all have the privilege of government support. Can you respect for a minute OP and her partner's choices?

Hey, can you calm down with the judgements and understand they come from a different culture? Not everything works the Western way.

Honey, run, don't walk! If you want to live a happy, stable, and long life, let go of this heavy weight. Don't tell him anything. Just walk away with your most crucial belongings when he's not there. Have a friend or family member be there with you in case he escalates. Your safety and health are your priority. And please, don't look back. You got this!

So it's not jarring for you to lie to your wife and kids' face? You like to take the easy ways out, don't you? You rather be called a liar and a fake, rather than be called a divorced man. You rather be a coward, than face a situation. This isn't about your family. This is about you getting the best out of the situation and leaving your family in the dark. You want to have a cake and eat it too. Suit yourself. Maybe other folks will have better advice on how to cover your mistress.

I wasn't talking about just chores. I mentioned romance. Women need to be emotionally connected to feel intimacy and passion. What does she think of the relationship? If she doesn't want to change anything, then you have to put the situation for her on the table and let her knows there's no intimacy in the relationship and you're looking to seek it elsewhere. SHE needs to say or no to divorce too. It's not just your choice. You need to be open with her about it and she will have her options. If she says "okay, keep having sex with other women as I can't give that to you and I don't want a divorce", then there you have it. If you truly respect her as you you do, you'd come clean and you'd no longer need to hide your mistresses. Be honest at least. If she's your best friend and mother of your child, then be honest. You haven't answered me on the child issue. Why won't you ask and insist for the child to sleep in their room? Also, if you think doing this to your wife won't hurt your child, think again. The child will grow up in a loveless home, and he will struggle emotionally to form healthy relationships. They will struggle with trust. And, they will find out. They will know 🙃

This is the wrong forum for a question like that. No one will pat you on the back for engaging in such behaviour. I'd like to know too. When was the last time you made efforts to be romantic outside the bedroom? Bring her flowers, give her a day off from the child, take her out to a place she likes, ect. All I hear is nagging about sex, but nothing about romance. Also the baby sleeping in the bed is the #1 act that breaks sexual intimacy for a couple. You need to be more assertive and get the kid to sleep in a bedroom. It's not healthy at all for his development and your relationship. Would you consider couples counseling? What does SHE think of all this situation?

Well, hey you're leaving. You got this. Better things are coming your way.

How long have you been working with her? Were you paid so far for any hours of your work? I agree with everyone. One week is enough under such conditions. Keep it cordial and professional in case you need a referral.

What does your contract say? The notice depends on what's listed in the contract. And cheers for a new job and new beginning!! 🍾🍾

But I don't think that's her case. She's been with him for years and hasn't asked for much. And why would she pay rent if there's no rent to pay?! It doesn't make any sense. Agreed.

See, despite his social media making him look ideal, he's just a normal human being. I agree with your thoughts on this topic. He doesn't seem in the right headspace for anything serious now with all the therapy and healing going on.

Absolutely! And I've dated men who lived paycheck to paycheck and who stepped up to offer me anything to help when I struggled. And I've done the same to other people. It's just common decency.

Nope. Your feelings are valid 100%. Why he didn't ask how he can help is beyond me. He makes six figures, yet has you paying for almost everything AND giving him "rent" (bonus). That's how this guy is rich! Please reconsider if he is partner material. Most men would step up and make sure you've got a good financial arrangement until you're back doing well. They would at least show some empathy! It seems he doesn't have any though. As Jaunty said, he's selfish. He takes advantage of you and you let him. This is a character thing, and you can't change it. It's just how he is. It's a deal-breaker for me personally.

Because most often victims of assault freeze or fawn. It's not so simple to get up and walk away. Very few know how to fight a man when caught off guard and in danger. OP, the line is blurred here. I think you absolutely need to cut ties with him and seek support/therapy. If you deem this was consensual, please come clean to your family. If you deem it wasn't consensual, then please seek support. If you think he's gaslighting you, then again, cut ties and forget about him. He doesn't sound like a great catch honestly considering his behaviour. You need to move on. Block and delete this number in ALL cases.

And? What's your question?

@mylolita Big sista here 🙋 And I'm going through something very similar with my sibling with our meeting coming up soon! I would say focus on what brings you together rather than what sets you apart? For the partner thing, I'd either bring it up once or sit tight and forget about it. But I know it's not easy to do the latter when it's your own sibling involved. If you focus on bringing her close enough to you, she might turn to you when things get emotionally very tough?

Awww that's such a cute story. He could totally see your nervousness, but he carried on and made you feel comfortable with a hug 🥰 You guys met via a hobby, so it's like you already established something in common. I like that! And, the opal ring sounds fabulous!! 💍

Mr perfect on paper. Tbh, a lot of coaches are self-absorbed and superficial, so I'd be wary of that to keep the expectation more real. A family member of mine is dating a well known coach and he is a manipulative entitled self-centred one. Because he's attractive to some women, he plays on that to manipulate and charm them. Sigh... But I feel you on the crush. If it helps, remember that he could be like any person with pros and cons. Also, he might be intimidated by you too! You've got your own personality and charm too.

This is the result of HIS OWN actions. All he had to do was do his job and not harass women. Like a regular person. Instead, HE CHOOSES to be a creep and assault women, and in turn lose his job. HE CHOOSES to do it also while cheating on his wife. And here you are, funding it all for him. Funding an assaulter. How does that sound to you? OP, YOU are NOT responsible for this adult. HE is. He is responsible to find money. He is responsible of his horrible action. You divorced him. And that's absolutely a great step forward for your life. You need to move on. Block and delete his number or change yours. Simple. No need to be a doormat any more. No need to feel any guilt. Stand up for you. You are worthy of a better relationship and a better life.

No way 😍🥰🥰🥰 I love this!! How was the first date? And your proposal!! Lol I can't help it. You guys give me hope ❤️

@lostandhurt 😍 I LOVE this. It all sounds amazing. You got this!

I did not know that was even a thing! 😄 😍Did you meet him via OLD?

You are enough. His job is just his job. It doesn't mean he is above or below anyone. All humans have equal worth. I mean the texting or lack of texting isn't always a good determinant of the success of the date or the amount of interest in one another. I once matched with a guy on OLD. We hit it off quite well. LOTS of texting. We had a lot in common. I thought "Oh waw! I Can't wait to meet him". We meet, and then guess what? IRL, he looked like a sibling!! An unattractive version of him. AND he shared he has an addiction to coffee, food, and cigarettes. He kept shoving these things as we talked. Yikes. These are things you just can't filter on the app (he didn't mention smoking in his profile. Nope!). AND his pictures were from 4+ years ago 🙄😤 Needless to say, I almost thought I was cat fished and I left the date early-ish. The texting built up some disappointing expectation.