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Everything posted by OhReallyJan

  1. I did block him after basically telling him to eff off. Felt so good!
  2. We had been separated for 3 years, a d only just recently finalized it. I have long since moved on.
  3. Oh I’m not reaching out to her. My girlfriend said I should, but this poor girl is very clearly in love with him. Her whole profile is pictures of him. I don’t want to get involved, I already feel awful for unknowingly coming between them. I’m out.
  4. He told me he planned on moving back, and wanted to build a relationship prior to him moving back. I honestly think he’s stuck in Michigan with this girl, wants to move back home, but needs a place to live. He moved out there after his 10 year girlfriend gave him the boot, and he didn’t have a place to live so he got friendly with this girl in Michigan (who from what I can tell was a fan of his). Tried to run the same game on me, but it didn’t work with me. There’s a saying that goes: what do you call a musician without a girlfriend? Homeless.
  5. The sad thing is I was not even looking to date. He just appeared out of the blue. I tried to cut him off but he wrote me a diatribe about how badly I hurt him. I think he’s a flaming narcissist. I mean he was the singer for a popular band. He even asked me why I didn’t seem intrigued by him. Like...what?? He’s used to girls just fawning all over him.
  6. I even told him in my kiss-off message that I was not going to hang around and be an ego boost for him. So funny you bring that up!! He’s just so sleazy, I considered messaging his girlfriend but I don’t want to get anymore involved than I was. I’m recently divorced so this is all very new to me, but I’m gonna stay single. This is just bananas that people are like this.
  7. It’s very apparent you didn’t even read what I wrote! If you did, you’d see that he lives 1,000 miles away, so we couldn’t meet ASAP. You assumed he was married, when I never even said he was. You assumed we had no mutual friends, then when I said we did, you assumed we had 1, when in fact we have 3 mutual friends. How about reading what people actually post before dishing out terrible advice? Yikes.
  8. And where did I even say he was married? He’s not, that I know. My mutual friends all said he was a good guy too, but keep making assumptions.
  9. Ok so why are you mad about this? I sent him fully clothed photos. Stop assuming things. We talked for a month. A whole month. Zero investment on my part. Again stop making assumptions.
  10. Wow you are really rude for literally no reason. I am not painting myself as a victim. I am venting because a 40 year old man thinks he can game women online. Like I don’t understand why you are getting hostile because I didn’t search his name quickly enough. We have 3 mutual friends. Not even relevant. You sound miserable and bored and totally not helpful.
  11. Does it really matter that I didn’t search earlier? It doesn’t. I found them a month later. Again, they don’t show up on his profile and I didn’t really care all that much to search until he got upset with me for thinking he was a player.
  12. We were friends on Facebook and the photos I found were not on his profile. She tagged him in photos, but he chose not to have them display on his profile. They do however show up in search.
  13. Oh I wasn’t invested at all. I knew something was off. I’m just appalled at the audacity of this man. I certainly dodged a bullet!
  14. Y’all...I just really need to vent because I can’t even believe there are people out in the world who do this to other people. In early January, a guy messaged me on Facebook after I left a comment on his band’s Facebook page. We get to chatting and find out we have a lot in common. I’m recently divorced, but haven’t actively been dating. I figured if someone showed up in my life I would go with the flow. He lives 1000 miles away but is originally from where I live, and has plans to move back once he receives the COVID vaccination. He said he had only planned to stay out there for 6 months, but then the pandemic happened so it left him in a holding pattern. He tells me he moved out of the state after ending a 10 year relationship. So we had been communicating daily, and he came in pretty strong. Some of our conversations turned sexual. We shared photos and there was definitely a mutual attraction. He started future planning: told me how he wants to go camping with me, and have movie marathons, and that he can’t wait to meet me. He basically made it seem like we were each other’s soulmates. The whole time though, something just wasn’t sitting right with me. He wouldn’t talk on the phone, and would only communicate via Google hangouts (after we had moved the chats off Facebook messenger at his request). I kept thinking it was odd that he was waiting until he got vaccinated to move, seeing as plenty of people have moved during the pandemic. Due to my concerns and red flag alarms going off, I asked that we cease communication for the time being, but if he ended up visiting or moving back we could pick up from there. I told him I had been played in the past, so I was a bit on guard. He got really upset, told me I hurt him so bad and couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to remain in contact. He was offended that I thought he was a player. I told him I didn’t want to get attached only to be disappointed if it turned out he never moves back. After some serious begging on his part, I agreed to remain friendly with him, but asked that he cut back on writing to me so that I don’t get my hopes up. I still wasn’t feeling right about the whole thing, so last week I decided to search his name on Facebook. I ended up finding pictures that he was tagged in - but these pictures were not displayed on his profile. Come to find out, he’s been in a relationship with a girl for over a year, she’s tagged him in a bunch of kissy lovey dovey photos, and it also appears he moved out of state to live with this girl! Her profile picture is of the two of them - and was updated a few days before he connected with me on Facebook. I was beyond furious, but decided to wait until he messaged me to let him have it. First thing the next morning he messaged me and I responded that I knew he had a girlfriend and that it was a really crappy thing for him to string me along while semi-cheating on this poor girl. I was polite but firm, saying I hope he finds what he’s looking for and that he should work on finding happiness within his current relationship. I then blocked him. But seriously what the hell? I honestly think he moved out of state to mooch off his current girlfriend, realized it’s not working out, and is now trying to move back here by buttering me up so he has a place to live. I just honestly cannot believe a 40 year old man would pull this kind of crap! I’m not hurt or broken, I’m just dumbfounded!
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