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ValleyGirl123

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  1. I would absolutely agree with what you said. Luckily, every single family member is in agreement that she is acting certifiably insane, which makes me feel a little better about the situation. If this was not the case, I would be very nervous to join the family officially.
  2. YES. Thank you. It feels nice to have someone who understands 😅. We are limited to a MAXIMUM of 50 people at our venue due to covid restrictions. Unfortunately we don’t have enough space to invite EVERYONE. If we were going to invite her and she chose not to attend due to her child not being invited, that is her choice. However there are plenty of people who would be able to watch her daughter for free that are not attending the wedding so that should absolutely not be a concern.
  3. Yes she has. Not going to go into the details but she has not made great life choices.
  4. That is EXACTLY what I thought!!! I want to make memories with people. Enjoy the open bar. People can’t fully “let go” when they have to worry about taking care of children. Everyone else was totally fine with this decision. His best man has a 6 month old and is completely excited for a night out!
  5. *sigh* I don’t know... I have a feeling if she does apologize if will not be sincere (and my S/O is in agreement on this). It would more like be an apology because she got caught doing something wrong and is apologizing for getting caught rather than her action itself.
  6. I in no way think I’m better than them. Every person and family is different and deals with different challenges (mine is no exception to that statement). The comments I made throughout are only what my S/O has told me after numerous conversations we have had about why they have acted and conducted themselves the way they have. These are the excuses and reasons he has given me. My relationship with everyone else in the family is fine- no arguments or ANYTHING remotely or the sort. We spend enjoyable time together- I might not be their “best friend” but we are absolutely cordial and friendly.
  7. Yeah I think that’s a very good point. This whole thing happened about 2 months ago and she has not reached out to apologize one talk about it since. I think a conversation at this point is a good first step.
  8. That is exactly what I have been thinking. If I give in now, it makes it ok. Almost like giving a child who throws a temper tantrum in a store the candy they are screaming for. I feel like not inviting her would solve 3 things: 1) I’m scared of her and of being around her 2) she hates me and our engagement anyway; people there at the wedding should only be people who support the bride and groom 3) I am making it VERY clear that this behavior is not acceptable and there ARE consequences for acting like that. Clearly she’s gotten away with it in the past and that’s why she acts li
  9. It’s crazy! I don’t understand it! They have only been exposed to failed marriages so I just doubt they have any concept of what you are actually supposed to value and prioritize in a successful marriage
  10. We are actually already having a small wedding- less than 50 people. Which is why no kids- already keeping it small and don’t have headcount for peoples kids. We are only having immediate family and close friends!
  11. They were both mortified. The uncle stayed out of it but the mom tried to reason with her and got yelled at to be quiet. my boyfriend says that she’s his sister and he would love to have her there because he Grew up close to her but is completely on my side and in agreement that her behavior was unacceptable. And that he wants to do whatever I feel comfortable with and understands if I don’t want her there.
  12. I’m definitely not the person who ever fights back. When this happened I didn’t fight back in any way. Quite the opposite... I was about to start sobbing so I got up and quickly left the restaurant to remove myself (and to try and diffuse the situation). She did however run after me and chase me out and that’s when she *tried* to physically attack me. Lucky for me my fiancé chase her as well and grabbed her before she could get her hands on me!
  13. So she has had problems in the past- she does have a criminal background and from what I understand she has some anger issues (go figure 😂). I don’t *think* she would physically attack me at the wedding, but who knows if something really set her off. No one thought she would ever escalate like she did in that public restaurant, and yet here we are. Would she be rude? Make snide comments? Give me the nonstop death glare the entire time? Boss me and him around? All very plausible. I would rather not have to worry about her ourbursts on the day of my wedding because she is not the type of person
  14. It is definitely not “all or nothing”. He has spent plenty of time with all members of his family both with me and by himself. The problem lies in the fact that they are not used to sharing him and have the perspective they THEY are his family and come first over me. This is true when you first date someone, but priorities change when you are marrying someone. I mentioned before that no one in his family is married and those that previously were are divorced. I think they they don’t really understand what a solid dynamic between husband and wife looks like since to them, they are all each oth
  15. Also just to be clear- if this were ANY other person on this earth that acted like that, I would have called the police in that very moment and filed a police report for assault. They would be permanently out of my life no questions asked. The only reason this is even up for debate at all, is because she is my future sister in law.
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