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LunarUK

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  1. Sorry to hear that. It must be so disappointing to feel that he’s pulling away just as you start to relax, be yourself and enjoy his company. You’ve only been dating for a short while so there’s a number of reasons why he may have pulled away, not just you getting cute and gooey. Is he dating other people if you’re not exclusive yet? Does he feel he no longer needs to chase now that you’ve been dating for a few weeks, are already having sex etc. Whilst it’s frustrating, just mirror his actions and don’t over do it. Eg When he messages, you message. Don’t over explain, try to com
  2. Whilst I think she probably did over react, as a woman I think I can understand how she felt. She’d spent the whole day treating you and what she heard was “is that all you’re going to offer me?” and probably came across as being ungrateful. You probably should’ve communicated your needs as a request rather than a demand or expectation. Also I’m concerned about the language you used around her period: It’s not about whether you decide to proceed with caution but whether you both wanted to. By her words, you could clearly hear the underlying message of I don’t want
  3. Thanks for the update Marie29, but I’m greedy and curious! Let us know if you actually go on this next date and whether he keeps just getting to know you, or suggests going to his again. The proof is in the pudding! And good luck 😁
  4. I think that’s the issue here. Ordinarily, it’s very unlikely that you would go to someone’s house on a third date unless it naturally progressed to that very quickly. But in a pandemic? In the middle of winter? There are very few options. But it can be risky for women, so we have to take precautions to feel as safe as possible. Eg go during the day, be clear about how you feel, let someone know where you are, send a friend a screenshot of his profile.
  5. Hey Marie29, I think you made the right call and personally saw nothing wrong with what you said to him. If that’s how you feel and express yourself, so be it. That’s you. I’m lockdown dating too and after two walking dates, my guy asked me over to his instead as there’s not much else to do. I panicked when he asked. I don’t do ONS and was surprised as he hadn’t indicated anything forward/pushy up until that point. I didn’t respond then and there, but when I got home explained that I didn’t feel comfortable/too soon. But his response was amazing: “understand, no rush, so what makes
  6. That sounds like a really positive start. And it’s great that he’s already asked you out on another date. Having said that, I can personally understand why it might seem frustrating as most guys show intense interest at the start, but that’s not always a good indicator in itself. How is the communication been since the date? Is he showing an interest/initiative. Also, consider his background. Where’s he from? I’ve dated people from different nationalities and have often noticed differences in dating etiquette. So what might be slow to you might be normal to him. Keep us posted with th
  7. I wonder if she’s worried about going too fast physically? You already did a lot but she may think you now want more and she’s not ready/assertive enough to say. How about asking her out for a coffee or something somewhere public, making it clear that you’ve only got a couple of hours to spare before you have to be elsewhere? Anything to take the pressure off. For me, as someone who prefers to take it slower and has worried about it in the past, it may feel safer to know that it was just a regular date without the possibility of an awkward moment when sex may be expected and having to push bac
  8. Hi Anonone1, This is a relatively unique and intriguing situation. I know this sounds strange, but I can’t help but think about it from a manager’s point of view in a workplace (bear with me, I know it’s completely different!). For me, I’d focus on having a discussion with her where you would agree on a shared goal and working towards it together without telling her, pressuring her, nor simply leaving her to her own devices. Try asking whether she sees sex in your future together? If so, what would it look and feel like? What things would she like to do to work towards
  9. Good for you for standing your ground. Really hate it when guys are opaque then once they get what they want, ask for FWB. They know what they’re doing - had he been upfront, he knows it would’ve been no. Like @lostandhurt said, this would’ve happened sooner or later whenever you decided to do it (very simple but very good advice - hadn’t thought of it that way before and makes me feel we should be less hung up about timings), so at least you’ve saved yourself some time here. But sorry it didn’t work out and better luck next time. I would say clarify intentions earlier on next time,
  10. And another thing: do be wary of guys who say they wanna go with the flow if what you’re actually looking for is a relationship. I’ve had that line dropped to be before: to me it meant this might grow into a relationship. I later discovered that to him it meant I just want something casual. So do clarify as early as possible before you get too attached. And if the answer is anything less than. “Yes! I’m looking for a relationship”, even if it’s a don’t know/unsure. Treat it as a no and act accordingly until he shows you otherwise.
  11. Hi OP, I don’t really have advice as such, as I’m in a very similar position. I just wanted to let you know that you’re not alone in those values and I find myself doubting myself at times, because it appears to be an unusual stance to take. I’ve had a strict Catholic upbringing, only started dating much later in life and prefer to sleep with people after getting to know them with the intention of having a relationship. Nothing wrong with how you feel at all and in some ways it helps sift the time wasters. All I would say (having, today, finally “given up the goods” myself to a guy
  12. That’s the one. Thank you Kamaurj. I thought I’d broken a rule or something 🙈
  13. Thanks Wiseman2. I tried that but keep getting this message: Sorry, there is a problem You do not have permission to view this content. Error code: 2F173/K
  14. Apologies if this is the wrong place for it (I’m new), but I don’t know if it’s a system error or deliberate but I can’t find one of the posts I started and didn’t get a message/email?
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