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chocolateyes

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About chocolateyes

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  1. Thank you again! :) Thank you! I found this pretty helpful. Well said, and I'll keep in mind that it's true - I can't save someone. They have to help themselves and want for a change. I appreciate you :) I didn't mention anywhere in this thread about living with my parents. I pointed it out once in the other thread in case anyone wondered why I still do, since it's not common in the West. I've made it clear several times that I'm planning on moving. As I have said, I didn't realize how toxic my environment was until recently. I use my background to explain, rather than as an ex
  2. Oh I know, but thank you! I am still very much into moving away from the family despite wanting to keep a relationship with my mom. Thank you for this. I did start going to counselling but COVID hit hard where I am and the whole thing is still closed for now, except for phone call sessions which I am not into. I'll start at it again whenever they open normally. I honestly didn't even think there was a problem until I started becoming more and more anxious. I went for anxiety help but it turned into an explosion of so many things that I didn't even know ever truly bothered/stayed with m
  3. I know what you mean, but really, other than my brother acting out these past few weeks, I haven't had any issues with anyone in my family for years. While I'm fine moving away and moving on from my family members (who all have serious problems with each other), I am interested in keeping my relationship with my mom.
  4. Thank you so much. And yes, I haven't told any of them I plan to leave and all that. I'm just studying and staying to myself in the meantime. I appreciate your thoughts :)
  5. Hi again, thank you for your thoughtful replies to my previous thread. I found them very helpful and so I decided to request for more advice/thoughts. Something quick to add is that in the culture in which I was raised, "family respect" a.k.a. how society sees you, is everything according to the cultural norms. My biological father became abusive to my mom in the middle of her pregnancy with me, as he always wanted a son, not a daughter. Obviously, there was something amiss in his brain but regardless, he made life a living hell for my mom and abused her frequently. She was in a foreign co
  6. I'm going to save up and move out. While it's my brother who is the instigator, my other family members, by basically doing and saying nothing, essentially condone this behaviour and I've had enough. I knew in my mind I wasn't exactly wrong to feel the way I do about the situation, but I wanted to make sure by asking the forums. I've kept my bedroom door locked at night long before posting and I'm just happy that I'm not crazy in feeling this way about my brother. Thanks again.
  7. My brother and I have always had a pretty good relationship despite living in a turbulent household (parents always arguing and dad, cheating). We're both in our twenties and I'm his older sister by 5 years. In our culture, we stay with our parents until marriage, and family is everything. So despite all the turmoil between our parents, we've all always tried to work things out to keep our family together. I've always been a mega nerd, scoring high marks and basically just dedicating my life to academics. My brother's always been extremely social and has gotten into trouble over the years (get
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