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Everything posted by hoyos2020

  1. I'm in my mid 20's not 30's. No more Tarot, that was only once back in January, The fact that you would bring that up is low lol. But I get it since i put all of this out there asking for advice. I'm not strong enough to block him yet but hopefully I find the courage one day.
  2. That is a great question that i honestly do not have an answer to. I want to let go, but everytime I do, here he comes and always says/does something to reel me back in.
  3. He is moving here in February and thats all we've spoken of since he left. So thats why I'm just so confused about everything, his actions this weekend definitely did not match his words the past 2 months and something definitely has to have changed because how can you fly 3 hours to the town where the girl you "like" lives and not make any attempt to want to see her. Even like 2 weeks ago, I had posted on instagram a picture of dinner, (i was out with a female friend) and he responded to it asking who i was with and saying that I better not be on a date, I told him "why would i be on a date, when you know I only want you" and he thats the same night he called me to tell me that he was planning on coming out here with his friend for xmas but they hadn't bought their tickets yet. So I don't want to say i'm wrong for assuming that we would see each other and i am very hurt.
  4. i mean the last time he was here 2 months ago, he stood with me and made it known that he wants to be in a relationship and he did try to have sex but I turned him down and i told him that we should take things slow and get to know each other better etc, he stood with me for 1 week and after he left he told me that he was so happy we didn't have sex because he feels it made us closer and our bond stronger. But that was 2 months ago and Since then we speak everyday and that is why i am so confused.
  5. My crush flew to my town and I only found out because he texted me on Christmas, and I asked him what he was doing, he told me that "he was packing because he was flying out here tmmr". I was like "why you didnt tell me" His response was "lol, do you work this weekend". And I said " I was on call" and he responded "okay". He had told me a few weeks prior that he was planning on visiting for Xmas with his friend, but they didn't buy his flights. I did not hear from him in two days. So I texted him asking, "hey, how was your flight?" he responded it was good and how I was doing, i said good and he responded "oh okay." At this point I was just so confused because we talk/text almost every day and I thought he would want to see me or ask to hang out. So anyways, in a desperate attempt to see him, i embarrasingly took a risk and ended up texting him the following.... Me: sooo you flew all the way out here and we're not going to see each other? I've been so horny since you told me you were flying out here this weekend" Him: Lol really, damn i'm with my friend and we're out celebrating his bday, I would come over but i feel bad leaving him alone I didn't reply and the next day he texted me around 8 pm asking "WYD" I responded that I was home. 2 hours passed by and he never texted me back so I ended up texting him again, Me: "did you text me and then throw your phone in a river, I thought you asked wyd cause you wanted to come over". Him: I'm sorry i didn't have time to come see you,I fly back tomorrow but i promise i'm gonna fly back soon and stay with you for a few days if thats cool with you. It was just a quick weekend trip for my friends bday and i'm really tired and leave early tomorrow" i haven't responded because idk what to say. i really want to go off but he at least had the decency to apologize and idk if i should feel offended that i put myself out there and got turned down or if I should just act like I'm not bothered. We're not in a relationship and I don't want to ruin the chances of eventually being in one with him by acting crazy and going off. He probably would have never even told me that he was coming and I just wish i never offered myself off like that and i am so embarrassed and not sure what to say when he reaches back out.
  6. Thanks everyone. Ugh I feel dumb I was on the path to put him on a pedestal. Him and his friends probably had a list of girls they called that night. I just don't get how someone can claim to feel someway but then switch instantly. I want to cut off all contact but I know if I do hear from him he's just going to say "see thats why i didn't want anything serious with you because I knew you would ghost me". So its like a lose, lose situation.
  7. Recently got back in contact with and old FWB. We haven’t spoken in a very long time. He says I ghosted him. Upon starting to hang out again, he mentioned that he is shocked at how successful I am and everything I have going on with myself and he really loves how confident I am etc and he regrets us not getting serious sooner. That night we kissed each other on the lips goodnight. A few days later, at about 12am he calls me super drunk and tells me how much he wants to be with me and just all of these beautiful things and how i’m the one, and then his friend gets on the phone and is like “what did you do to him, he is so in love with you, you two need to stop playing games, and that he better be the best man at the wedding”. The next day, he texts me to meet up. So I’m thinking that he wants to meet up to talk about us getting serious and so he starts talking about his night and so I hint at the phone call. And he says “wait, I called you” So I remind him of the call, and tell him everything that he said and he was in complete shock, saying omg I can’t believe I said that. I was like yeah so do you really feel that way and he says yes but then says that i am more of what he can ever ask for in a woman and that he is very attracted to me and so happy when we are together and that my success inspires him so much. But that he is a jerk and i am such a sweet person and he would never want to hurt me and he just has a lot going on that he has to deal with and he is so scared of getting hurt again (his ex cheated) and he’s scared that we get serious and then I just ghost him again. We just left it at that. A few days later, he texts me if I can help him with something so he came over and I had already cooked dinner for myself so he had some and said that it was the best food he ever had and was like “wow that was amazing you are going to make someone so happy one day” and then winked at me. I just responded that I know it was so good i had two plates and laughed. I’m just so confused, because I know by experience that when you’re drunk, the truth comes out. And the times we have been hanging out, nothing sexual, we’ve had such amazing times and we get along really well. He told his friends about me. I just don’t get it. How can you think so highly of someone and profess your love and then say “I’m going to make someone happy one day”. At this point I feel like I like him too much to see him as a friend, so idk if i should tell him how I feel and then cut off contact or if I should just wait and go with the flow.
  8. I did decide not to meet up with him. What happened between us was just so long ago and I don’t want to revisit those feelings just to get hurt/disapointed again. I know myself and I can’t lie and act like I won’t have any expectations from us meeting. I let him know that I was blocking his number for good and decided to move on in my life and he should to and wished him the best. He did contact me from a different number and said "wow I flew all the way out here for you and this is how you treat me, and this is why it will never work, you're missing out on an opportunity to be with someone that will be good to you but whatever your loss, I'm done" I haven't responded because idk what to say or whose # that was. I'm just in a different place in my life, I don't have time for games.
  9. So a few months ago on my birthday, I got a tarot reading and they told me right before the fall, the one i will marry will reveal themselves to me and confess their true love and it was someone i already know from a past life. Story: I met JR 10 years ago. When we met, He was 24, I was 19 and I was head over heels in love with him. Our relationship turned into an FWB because he “wasn’t ready to be serious” and after 2 years on and off in 2013 we stopped seeing each other after I stood him 2X because I was busy with college and finishing my bachelors. So anyway, he called me randomly in 2015 asking to meet up but by then I was married and told him to not contact me and 2 years later I got divorced and moved to a different state after getting my masters degree. In 2018 he requested me on FB. We exchanged # and spoke on the phone and spoke for like 3 hours catching up and he was saying why did I get married, and that WE shouldv’e been married and had kids by now etc. I was like when I wanted you, you didnt want me so thats on you and we laughed about it. About a month after that, he texted me “Hey i’m in town visiting family and hope to see you “i responded, “you should’ve told me in advance so we could have made plans. I was working 3 jobs at the time and we made plans to meet up but i ended up having to cancel with him 3x cause of work. The day he left, he sent me a message saying “I can’t believe you stood me up again. I really hoped to see you after all these years. and I responded, “well you hit me up last minute, and I wasn’t going to call out of work to come see you, you don’t pay my bills. He responded, okay well if I ever come back i’ll let you know in advance. We spoke on and off since 2018 but i was in/out of different relationships so I hardly ever responded and We didnt’ really talk again until this year in may 2020 when he contacted me during quarantine, In conversation he asked me “how come I never wanted him” and I told him “dude you need to move on, you are stuck in the past, when I wanted you 10 years ago you turned me down. You are nostalgic” He blamed it on me and said that deep down he always knew I was the one and that its my fault we are not together but i’m the one that always stood him up, disappeared, turned him down and got married etc. I’m like yeah its called moving on and living your life, I wasn’t going to spend my life chasing you, we were just FWB’s 10 years ago like how many times do I have to explain myself. (This wasn’t me yelling, it was a heart to heart conversation) Any way so then I asked, and why are you even single, like why aren’t you married with kids, and he mentioned that he has been in 3 serious relationships but he has never someone that made him even consider marriage and that he always wanted to be financially secure before settling down with anyone. Which he is now, he is in real estate and very wealthy. I personally think he is going through a mid life crisis or just got dumped and realizing he’s getting old now that he’s 34. So anyway, we’ve been talking on/off for the last few months and he keeps begging to come see me so we can “talk”. and last night he texted me a photo of his flight ticket saying “I decided to book a flight and take a risk, i’m sure you’re just going to stand me up as usual, but I want you to see that I am serious and really want to see you, I’m going to be staying with family but I’ll be here and whenever you want to meet up just call me” So I’m guessing he is the guy my tarot reading was talking about. I haven’t responded to him because i don’t know how to feel about this. like what is he expecting is going to happen, we’re going to lock eyes and be inseparable? Like why after all of these years he is so desperate to “see me”. Is it my fault for entertaining him every time he contacted me? Any advice would be very helpful. Thank you.
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