WalterSobcha

You are right to feel hurt and unimportant when you are treated this way (I quoted the part that shocked me the most, but this applies to the rest of your post too). Leave this woman ASAP.

I disagree with this. If you're committed to the relationship and think it could benefit from counselling, why not do it? And three years together is not nothing.

Reread that... You're not being silly. This part I highlighted is much worse than not spending the new year with you.

I'd say you should have dumped him a long time before he did. From what you've described, he really isn't "the loveliest guy", far from it. You seem like a nice person and I think you should work on your self esteem issues, because there's no way anyone could reasonably tolerate this kind of behaviour from their partner. You deserve better! You were also giving him way too much slack about being broke and "not being able to find his first job as an actor". So his plan is to become a professional actor and to sit on his bum doing nothing until it happens? (which, for most people, of course won't happen... so many people want to be actors, and so few make it) You're definitely not too old, keep meeting new people (outside of dating apps if possible) and respect yourself more.

You don't "recover" from genital herpes. It really is forever.

Herpes is highly contagious and can be transmitted even if you wear a condom. So basically, if you are having sex with someone who has herpes, chances are you are bound to catch it eventually, even if you are careful and clean.

If you actually want to fix this relationship (which seems beyond repair IMO, but you never know) you both really need to lay off the swearing and aggressivity. I think both of you were wrong if the intention was to have a constructive conversation. NB: I'm commenting solely based on the chat you posted. I cannot comment on who is at fault with the relationship in general.

Do ask her (you have nothing to lose) but as others have said, your interactions so far mean nothing, as it's her job to try to get customers to come back, so don't get your hopes up too much.

She is treating you like ***. Having a reasonable level of pride is normal and healthy. You sound like you should have more pride, i.e. don't reach out to people who treat you like this. You are not dog poop and do not deserve to be treated as such. Forget about her, work on your self-esteem, and move on to better prospects.

For someone who is not stingy (unlike him, who, according to you, is the stingy one), you sure kept a very precise record of how much he spent, and how much every food item on the menu cost. You even said you two roughly make the same amount of money... so why would he need to pay for everything? Who knows, maybe he's posting on another forum and making a similar post about you.

She sounds just like a friend I used to have, and distanced myself with for exactly the same reasons. Toxic, very often drunk and/or high, self-centered, energy vampire, only talking about herself... I don't regret cutting off all contact with her. In fact, I should have done it sooner. You don't need toxic people in your life. Ignore her.

So, he's 23 years old, has had sex with 30ish people, and... he shares your sexual values ("no sex unless we know and care about the person, see something potentially in the future with them"). Really? I won't comment about whether this is right or wrong as that's a different topic, but... really? You still believe he shares your sexual values?

You really should say you're sorry... and mean it. Understand how you were out of line here; not with the original message, but with what happened after that.

IMO: Texting your boyfriend at 12.20 to send him something cute but definitely not urgent --> slightly inconsiderate, but without meaning any harm, so it can and should be forgiven quickly Following up with an accusatory message the next day --> a lot more inconsiderate, and worthy of an apology Calling him rude and selfish --> this is the worst part... it sounds like you're only thinking about yourself here; please reevaluate who was rude and selfish

Have a long, hard, honest talk with him about this and about your doubts. Best case scenario: you will become more intimate and have renewed faith in your couple. Worst case scenario: you will find out that your needs are incompatible and you will know before it's too late. Definitely have a talk before you take a decision.

I wouldn't know if he's cheating or not, but people in general tend to make the same mistakes over and over again. You say you are "pretty much experienced when it comes to a unfaithful partner". Is there something that unconsciously attracts you to these kinds of personality types?

He doesn't seem emotionally stable or available. Texting someone at 4am after only one date doesn't sound good, but what's most off-putting about this is that even though you said you were nice about it, he has ignored you ever since. It seems like he texted you when he needed someone to talk to, but once he no longer needed you, you got discarded. I'm sorry but it really doesn't sound like he respects you, so I would move on.

It's fine if you don't enjoy travelling, but do try it before you assume it's not for you. You may be pleasantly surprised.

Agree with the comments above. The lack of sexual attraction is just one thing, from your post it's clear that there are many more problems. I'm sorry, but after reading you, it really doesn't seem like this relationship is heading anywhere.

I'm also curious about how you found out her name. And showing up at her place, or her mother's place, is definitely a big NO. If you're lucky, they'll just ask you to leave and never show up again. If you're unlucky, they may call the cops on you.

Really sorry to hear that. I know I can't do anything to make it better... just know there are people here who are thinking of you.

OP, I think from reading your original post that you still have important issues to sort out, and are not ready to be in a relationship. It sounds like you are working on your issues, and that's great. I would make that a priority, and take time off from relationships until you're mentally healthier. Also, you started your post with "I think i have found the love of my life" but later on wrote: "Me feeling like i am so insecure i'll never find another great woman, coupled with my getting in a relationship as it'll make me feel better, look better, and who doesn't loved being loved. - But all this reasons are toxic reasons to want to be in a relationship. 5. Feeling like i am settling due to points 1 & 2 above." So, is this really the love of your life, if you feel that way? I would say no... Best of luck.

Sorry about that, but whatever his reasons are, he's not interested or he'd have replied... assuming he didn't get into an accident or anything that would prevent him from replying... but if you still see him having time to be active on social media and not having time to reply to you, then this is definitely over and you should move on.

This makes a lot of sense. Reread what you posted. Why would he keep asking you out after being turned down "lots of times"?

I don't see anything here having anything to do with being a Christian. From what you've posted, it does seem like he is very interested in a relationship with you. If you don't want that, then I'd kindly let him know. I'd try to do it subtly at first, so it doesn't become an awkward situation (keep the talk strictly professional, and ignore messages that are not work related). If he doesn't get the hint, then just politely say you want to keep the relationship professional.