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Quaver

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  1. Thanks very much. It's going to be tough but I am going to try an take it day by day. This has helped, it's made me think about what I need and not what he needs. I will forgive one day but I won't be forgetting. I think we need some work an I will hope for the best.
  2. I agree and trust me I made that very apparent. I said to him, I'm not the one who got into bed with someone... you did! He has stopped using these excuses now and understands that he made a mistake. Still doesn't make it okay but I need to focus on what I want and need for myself. I've got to be selfish for once. Really appreciate your replies btw
  3. Thank you SherrySher. I completely agree, the red flags are important. I was trying to shield myself and I know if I was to end things it would be horrible for me at the minute. I am being selfish and trying to figure out what I want from this relationship but I have definitely lost respect for him with it all. Just the lies, I hate liar's whether that be hiding the truth. I just wish he would of said before we were "official", right just before we do this here some things you need to know. It wouldn't of been as hurtful or hard to take. I completely agree and thanks again.
  4. I don't know 100% but, I didn't see anything that has told me otherwise. I can only go off my instinct unfortunately.
  5. Thank you. You're right, I have do have trust issues. In the beginning he was always a mystery, he was very private but things were going so well I never questioned it. The first opportunity I got I looked through just to ease my conscious (it wasn't much to scroll through, he doesn't use FB anymore). That's what got my back up with it, the excuses. They made no difference to the way I felt about it. I understand where you're coming from and appreciate the advice
  6. Thank you. It's difficult to think about him with anyone else other than me and it's just that I had to find out bits of information which just makes me hurt all over again. I understand that and the last thing I would want to do is break up with him, we've been through so much. We are currently saving for a house together. It's just about how I process this and learn to forgive which I don't find easy anyway. He suffers with mental health issues as well so I help him with that, we are both in the same boat like that. We work really well together, a lot of laughter and love. That
  7. Personally, I would text him back saying enjoy your time with my friend and please don't text me again I deserve better. I know that may be difficult but it will give him the reality check he so deserves. Please don't surround yourself with people that don't want the best for you, there's too many decent people out there. You need only distance yourself from negative so called "friends". You'll find a guy that loves you for you and not your friends
  8. Thank you, it's a really good relationship. I know it's difficult to balance the two. I want to be better for myself but I just don't need this to add to all of it. I am trying to give myself some time to come to terms with it. He has said that if I have any questions he'll answer if it eases my conscious. Thanks again for responding
  9. Rose Mosse - Thanks for your response. I found out yesterday the full extent, I first learnt everything like a week ago. I know the girl has tried to get in contact with him a couple of times since they slept together but he just didn't respond. I understand that, it's just difficult to get a grip on it, I was seeing a counsellor through work a month back. I know, it doesn't help my situation, especially with my trust issues. Thanks very much, we've been in open communication and he's being honest about everything. Just wish it didn't happen tbh
  10. Thank you, it's a really good relationship. I know it's difficult to balance the two. I want to be better for myself but I just don't need this to add to all of it. I am trying to give myself some time to come to terms with it. He has said that if I have any questions he'll answer if it eases my conscious. Thanks again for responding
  11. I really need some help. Where do I begin... I am in a relationship with someone who I think is the one for me. I have honestly never met anyone more suited for me in my life. We met on Tinder by chance, I had just gone through one of the traumatic experiences in my life and in he comes like a knight in shining armour. I swore off men for life, even pictured myself with a hundred cats! Anyway 2 and a half years go by and I am still dealing with my traumatic time, it kept coming up and he was there for me. I was at the lowest I had ever been, had to get some help from the doctors to ea
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