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kad03ink

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  1. Thank you for your message jibralta. I just want to make it clear so there is no confusion. As stated in previous post my family would visit regularly in the very beginning (first few months of our relationship. After that they only visit once every two weeks. My partner still acts very moody and isolates herself. In your opinion is showing respect and love in this short amount of time to make this relationship work unreasonable. If you have read my previous post you will see that i am not welcome to her family home even tho we get on well. If i act the way my partner does towards for family would that be a good thing.
  2. I should end the relationship. But im in love with her. I just want her to respect my family. The same way i do with her family even tho they also do me wrong. I want to be happy. I know that if things dont change i will have to walk away but at the same time i will be hurt more than ever
  3. Hello everyone. I just want to thank you all for all messages. It is much appreciated. I have read through them all and ill try answer as much of the questions as i can. My partner and i have been living together for 3 years. Wiseman2 you have asked why my family doesn't invite us. Well this is the problem. My family invite us over for dinner regularly. But my partner makes excuses 99% of the time and does not go with me. My mother did visit a few times a week in the very beginning of our relationship when i moved in with my partner. This was out of excitement to get to know my partner. It like i said before after she noticed my partners actions that stopped. We have now been living in my own property for the last 3 years. My family feel very uncomfortable visiting because of the way my partner acts. They only visit once every 2 weeks. She causes problems with her actions every time In terms of counselling, i would be very happy to commit to that. I have no other option at this point. I love her so much. As i said before we get on so well like best friends. But when family comes up she changes into something that i hate. I just want a happy life. No drama. I want us all to be happy. Has anyone had any experience with couples counselling? The reason i am asking is because i did see a concealer when i was a teenager for depression. It did nothing for me. I literally sat in a room with this woman who did not advise me or help me in any sort of way. She only asked me questions about how i feel. Antidepressants did help!!! If only there was a pill out there to help my partner wake up !!!!!!!!!
  4. Sorry i forgot to mention something very important. A few weeks ago i arranged for my mother and partner to meet for a coffee and talk. After their meeting my partner called me in tears saying she has realised how silly she has been. She was devastated by her actions. And again, a couple of days later back to square one. Mothers day just passed. I took her and her mother out for dinner. My partner didnt even send my mother a text!!!!!!
  5. Hello blusecastle. Thank you for your message. I am 38 years old and so is my partner. I totally agree with what you have said. My downfalls are that i am a very kind and reasonable person. I like to make people happy. I have hoped that the more i do to make her happy the more effort she would put in to make me happy. Which is only the family situation by the way. We get on very well other than that and i do love her incredibly. I know she also loves me but i question it when she treats my family badly. Its gotten so bad i cant given mention them in conversation without her pulling faces Also yes i have threatened to leave her over this. Again she apologises and says she will change but then does not
  6. Wow i was not expecting a response so quick. thank you. No i have never posted before. Yes we have discussed this several times. First she goes into defence, but after i explain how she acts and how i act she realises what she is doing wrong and says that she will change. But then she goes back to her old ways and goes into defence again
  7. Hello all, i am new to this site and the first time i have asked for help regarding my relationship. If anyone can help me with advice and pure honestly i would really appreciate it. I have been with my now fianće for 8 years. We got engaged 6 months ago. When we first meet it was amazing apart from a few things that bothered me. My partner was overly jealous. She didn't like me walking to the shops, going out anywhere without her, talking to friends on the phone for to long. Even going to a restaurant had its difficulties as she would constantly accuse me of looking at other woman, even if they were sitting behind me. If im honest i accepted it because i love her so much. The real problems started two years into the relationship when families got involved. I come from a large very close family. I love and adore my parents and my siblings. At first my partner showed alot of effort with them and it meant the world to me. After a short while my mother, younger brother and younger sister would visit a couple of times a week and my partner would show less effort with them and basically start to show her discomfort by acting moody. Of course my mother and brother noticed this. I have made many excuses for my partner as i wouldnt want to upset my family. I have spoken to my partner 100s of times about this but nothing has changed. In her defence, she comes from a family that are not very close. She speaks to her mother once a week if that. She has no true friends which i find odd also. Another important note to make which is most shocking is that i am not welcome to her mothers house. We dont have any problems. We get on very well but for some reason they do not have visitors to there home. My mother on the other hand invites us as a family for dinner regularly but my partner makes excuses and does not attend 99% of the time. After several arguments about this situation she has now started coming up with the most ridiculous reasons for not liking my mother and my younger sister who is 5 years old by the way. Here are a few of her reasons Your younger brother kept asking for chrisps when they visited. Your sister is makes a mess and your mother does not clean up her mess before she leaves (the mess being a few toys) Your mother asked your older brother to cut her grass. You speak to your mother to many times a week I dont know if the problem here is that my siblings and i help our mother as much as we can and it makes her jealous or is it something else. Yes we are close as a family and yes we help our mother when ever she needs us. Our father died a few years back and it has been hard on us all. Is it so bad that we are helpful. Is it so bad that we all love each other and would do anything to make each other happy. Would this get better. Do i just hope she will realise she has a good man by her side. I have dedicated myself to her. I show her and her family love and respect. I do everything and anything to make her happy. Why am i not getting the same. Am i doing something wrong. Do i leave her.
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