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proseyxi

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proseyxi last won the day on February 14 2020

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About proseyxi

  • Birthday 04/14/1994

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  1. Thank you, i wish I will in time...
  2. Hey there! We were dating for 3 weeks and basically he became colder after sex and after me asking if he wanted to continue seeing him in the future. I have it on detail here https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=563554 Also NC since 23rd of January. He said he would call if he changed his mind. Nothing since.
  3. It certainly wouldn`t hurt to get professional help. Since you have already been through so much, it can help get you closure and a help you build a new fountation of managing your emotions. Now you may be feeling ok but you need to establish being strong under pressure in general in your life`s struggles to come. And since you`ve also been suicidal it would be much helpful in my opinion, if not needed actually.
  4. Dating isn`t like playing tennis. He hits the ball to you, then you to him and so on. If he wants to pursue a connection with you he would, plain and simple. I don`t think it would hurt to ask him out and see his response but be careful to not set a pattern here.
  5. If I was interested in a man, I would never tell him that I go out with other men as well. Especially with details! I mean, come on... Yeah if I were him, wanting what he wants I would have do whatevr but not actually share it with you!!! The guy wants to have a hookup with no strings attached. True, you are not exclusice but if he were even 1% decent he would talk about not being exclusive rather than sharing this kind of information with his date! Jesus. He`s pathetic, cut him off. Make peace with your mind and know you can always do better
  6. Hey there! Thank you for answering to my questions! Now, do you see a pattern here? I doubt there were no men in your life (or aren`t still) that have an interest in you. But since youu are always preoccupied in "hunting" men that are unavailable, you are thinning your chances down. I really need you to go back and analyze the men that did like you one by one and find what they had in common. Were they loud, fun loving extroverts maybe? I think that might be the case since you are highly attracted by shy ones. My grandma said : Always go where you are welcomed. Since I realized that I stopped feeling rejected by men that I HAD to chase and enjoyed being chased instead. Maybe you are addicted to rejection in order to validate in yourself a deep insecurity of yours i.e. I`m not attrective enough, I`m not young enough, I`m a failure etc. Like a self-fulfilling prophecy. It`s the same concept with women that go after married men. They SEEK rejection. So, open your eyes and focus only in the men that actually do like you and give them a chance! And you never know!
  7. Since my first post about the guy that I stopped seeing last month, I`ve been quite better. I started CBT therapy and I am keeping myself busy with work and enjoying my hobbies. I`ve also seen progress by reading people`s stories here and giving my 2 cents as well - it`s been eye opening for me. But to an extend I keep thinking that I might have rushed things and called him out prematurely. He accused me of that saying: "just because we don`t get to spend time together for two days straight?why do you make it a big deal?" I said, it wasn`t about that. it was because of his apathy and cold behavior and because he cancelled plans twice, without any notice, I had to ask to find out, totally last minute. Maybe calling him to see if there was something wrong was too much? Did he feel bombarded in a sense? I`m very confused and troubled. I feel I should have waited to see how it would go. That maybe I was unfair to him. Was I too irrational? I want to know in order to make more mature decision in my dating life. Did I act like a child?
  8. In order to move on, for you, for your kids, you must take care of yourself. Your kids are going to get emotionally hurt if they see mom hurting, not fending for herself emotionally and drowning in misery. Worse even they could to mimic your behavior when they grow old. You have to teach them that no matter what happens, if the world beats you down 10 times, you`ll stand back up 11 times. They say you are strong - FIGHT FOR THAT TITLE, FIGHT FOR YOUR EXISTENCE. Expressing your needs, your feelings, your sadness, hurt, anger IS BEING STRONG. Leaving your needs unmet is what is coward. Open up to yourself, your people and seek happiness in simplicity. In time you will realize all you need- you have it already. I know women that are past their fertile years and they would KILL to have what you have even with a divorce. Hug yourself, you ARE STRONG. Play unstoppable by sia, it helps me, maybe it can help you as well.
  9. Let`s all take a deep breath here. I want you to clarify why you had this tinder account active. Reads to me you are insecure about your relationship, way before this whole thing happened. So you kept the account as a backup if need be. I might be wrong, but I also think this is what your gf also believes. How is your relationship in general? Are there things that trigger your OCD and obsession with knowning and controlling everything? You don`t seem as a guy who lives his relationship at ease, sounds there is more trouble underneath the surface, even subconciously. Do you trust her? I`m in the spectrum of OCD as well, but it only get triggered when there is reason to be triggered, otherwise I am not afraid to live without checking constantly. On the other hand, I wouldn`t jump to the conclusion that your gf is not over her ex. I`m over my ex but if I see in a relationship patterns of my ex, I will adress them and if not changed I will leave. Because nobody wants to live a bad situation for a second time. But I maybe she is just not sure yet that`s why she is asking for some space. It is a complicated matter. For me it seems she really loves you, but you have hurt her feelings by acting like this and she is confused. Please share more if you feel comfortable. I would suggest you take some timeas well, maybe go on a trip to clean your thoughts.
  10. Woah, before we get overwhelmed here, is it just this V day that is the problem or do you constantly notice the same pattern? Like, he is not giving as much as you want in your relationship or that your languages of expressing love are completely different? Bringing the ex into the conversation was a mistake. You don`t live in a current relationship what you lived or didn`t live in a past one. They are completely different things. But his unwillingness to have a conversation about your feelings and trying to educate himself on how his partner sees things is a red flag. If he is making you feel underappreciated and undervalued (is this a word ?) all the time, then I suggest you take time to reconsider the relationship. Yet it would be wise not to base your judgement on a single event.
  11. How about we live our best lives and they f*ck off with their STDs and all. Seriously, seek medical help, ALWAYS USE PROTECTION and revenge is being alive and well.
  12. Hahahahaaha of course it`s your fault he cheated! How else could it be with a self loathing, abusive, clown of a man? You know what, him saying that is a good thing. A VERY good thing. Shows you what kind of a POS he is and how lucky you are to have him out of your door. It`s fine, you don`t have to rush feeling like anything at this moment. See, no clock is ticking, no one waits, nothing is pending. Since your divorce is on its way you needn`t worry. Have a talk with your lawyer to press on and let it be. I suggest you completely cut off communication with your ex hus-not-even-band. Details of his life should be of no interest to you. Think of it this way: you already had a wedding, already have kids, you have a job (I pressume) and you are still SO FREAKING YOUNG?!?! Come on now, you are better than most women I know! Yeah ok you divorced so what? You were saved, living with a dead beat clown is worse than being divorced. Thank the stars you live in a country that allows for that. Many women around the globe are forced to marry and stay married with monsters and have no way of escaping. The kids- you don`t have to bent your life anymore to satisfy your biological clock! And did I mention, you have 2 beautiful souls to forever love you and care for you? Justin who? You got a visit from the ghost of past christmas sorta speak. They contributed to something yes, now it`s time for them to go. Remember the days you thought that something was impossible? I`m sure you did at some point. And things DID work out!
  13. :eek: Let`s see here: - He cancels your plans - He preffers his buddies over you - He will be gone for a ridiculous amount of time (3 weeks) - He doesn`t want to include you - He has done that once before,without talking about it with you, thus there is a pattern here - You never actually went vactioning together before (other than those weekends) - Voicing your thoughts and wants makes you feel like the bad guy in all this My question is: are you sure you are in a real relationship and not a situationship? It seems to me that it`s all his rules and you juust agree in fear you might come off as needy or pushing him away. Boy, this is definitely me & my ex bf. He did the same "boy" trips, from which I never saw a single photo from and guess what... He was just with another girl. My first love was on a "boys" trip when I met him back in 2017 and I was (not knowing) the girl he messed around with while his gf was back home.So having experience in that my advice to you is to RUN-RUN-RUN. Boy trips are an excuse to be single and have fun with other girls or be with the other girl if one has one. I have since taken an oath to break up the second a "boys" trip arise. Of course people need to have time with friends and without you but this is a different story.
  14. :eek:This is the reality: she wants you all to herself but doesn`t want herself all to yourself. She wants her freedom and your loyalty. This is (as others also said) manipulative and she gains more than she gives. Even if it`s just the sexual gratification. Since you want something personal and committed and she doesn`t want the same, part ways. The way she keeps you close is by messing with your head as you said in the title. All the boundaries are super blurry and she gives you mixed signals. Maybe SHE doesnt even know what she wants. Either way, let yourself free. Move on. It`s for the best.
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