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coolchick

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  1. coolchick
    Hey girl, because thats just our personalities, we arent capable of doing the things that they have done to hurt us so much. My best advice would be not to send it, he doesnt need to be told this. Get away from your computer and dont send it. Even turn off your phone and organise a group of your friends to go out for a couple of drinks, take your mind off it. Please start thinking about yourself first. Lets face it, has he even bothered to send you one? Nope, coz he's too busy with the girl that he left you for. Im sorry that hurts but you need to remember what he is like. good luck xx
  2. coolchick
    Hey girl, Yes, my ex came back to me after he split up with me and went to another straight away. We had been together to 4 years at the time and said he wanted to be on his own. He then went straight to this girl he met in his work. I was really upset by this but my ex wanted to be friends aswell. Basically have his cake and eat it! He soon found out this girl was a complete psycho! And that wasnt my opinion, she showed herself to be a nutter by stealing his phone one night, going through it till she found my number then giving me harassing phone calls and texts every hour of every day. I eventually got the number traced and turned out to be her! My ex worked in the police office so he knew that it was her. She also hacked into his msn pretending it was me and told him that i had been causing fights with her in our local night club over him, but only he knew that i was abroad at the time! He soon came running back realising that the grass aint always greener! If he's fooling about you with girl then he cant be serious about her, probably just using her to spend time with and you for the sexual part so that he can pretend to everyone else that he's moving on. Do you really want to be used for sex, for him to leave and go back into the arms of another girl getting to do what he wants? you're getting messed about girl xx trust me, ive been there xx
  3. coolchick
    Yeah thats good advice!! Thats more the lines i was looking for. He does mention some suggestive things to me, like i'll have plenty of chance to see him drunk etc and we make little joking, kinda sexual, comments! I just wish december would come quicker!
  4. coolchick
    I dont know, i think the flirting, if it is flirting, is much more exciting just now! Although i would dream of just kissing him right there and then! At the christmas night out i have so many dreams and fantasies about how the night will turn out. With him flirting with me and eventually we would just be together. Ive never felt like this in such a long time. I mean ive fancied people before but never like this. It almost feels like love but i know it definitely cant be. I think about him constantly. I havent heard any sort of signs from anyone? I know eye contact is a biggie, he gives me that quite a lot but what else would be tell tale signs of interest? x
  5. coolchick
    I know! its a nightmare! Its so bad now because i really like him beyond funny. Ive never felt so strongly attracted to someone apart from my ex. Not only is he absolutely gorgeous but his personality is amazing. He is the most down to earth, caring and funny lad that i have ever met. Just being around him and talking to him in work makes me smile so much! If i get texts from him then i get the most brillient feeling in the whole world! I sound like a crazy teenager again but i cant help feeling this way! I am far too shy a person to be able to ask him out for even a coffee or anything, i just couldnt bring myself to do it. When we text, he tells me that he's wanting to find out more about my drunken antics at the christmas party! I go out with a few other people in work on occasion and he always asks them what i get up to because he wants to know what im like outside of work. Im not sure if he's just friendly this way with everyone and im reading too much into it?? What other signs do you think there would be if he liked me?
  6. coolchick
    This is a question for both guys and girls, although guys opinions would be very much appreciated since you are hard to read! How can we tell that you are flirting or are attracted to someone? I am totally smitten with a guy in my work and i dont have the first clue to whether he's flirting with me or not! All your signs would be greatly apreciated! thanks x
  7. coolchick
    Hey everyone, Its been a long time since ive written my own post on here. Recently been feeling so down and think i need to sort it out! My ex ended our relationship nearly 7 months ago after 5 years together. It was a complete surprise to me but this was the sort of thing that my ex always did to me. Ended it when he felt like it and came back when he felt like it. Like an idiot i would always take him because i loved him and he knew this. Now tho, i went on holiday in september and my ex texted me the whole time saying how much he loved me and wanted me back. I learned this trick from the year before, he always makes sure he says things like this on big nights out that he knows im going on or holidays. Last year, we split for a few months and stupidly on holiday i constantly spent my time texting him back and reassuring him that i wasnt interested in anyone else apart from him, yet he had been seeing a girl at the same time! This year i have done nothing of the sort! There was no way i was going to text him back and more than anything i made sure i had a good time without him!! My problem now tho is that he is constantly in my head. I know that i cant get back together with him because he's such a horrible person and definitely not someone i want to spend my life with. But why do i always want him in my arms, why do i always fall for it when he gives me so much abuse and talks to me like crap, says sorry a couple of days later but yet gives me the abuse again. Ive already tried no contact with him but its so much more harder than it sounds. When he says sorry and goes on and on i just feel sorry for him It makes me angry that i do. I know that he doesnt want to be with me. He's made that clear many many times and when he tells me he loves me there's always an agenda to it. Its been 7 months now and the only lads that i meet are always vulger. Maybe its just typical men but if i talk to someone long enough and they are actually lovely (that very rarely happens), i give them my phone number. But garunteed that after a day they will talk really dirty, sometimes even worse ask for 'naughty' pictures!! Whats the deal with lads?? Its totally made me loose confidence in the whole dating thing and is the reason i sometimes long for my ex when i dont want him Hope anyone can reply and help x
  8. coolchick
    Oh girl, my heart goes out to you so much. I have been in your position more times than i can ever want to remember and i let it go on for nearly a whole year. People kept telling me that he was playing games and messing with my head but i wouldnt hear any of it. Even tho in my heart i knew. All he wanted to do was to keep me interested in him so that he could feel like someone special. With you calling so many times he's probably out with his friends and showing them how obsessive you are. I know you wont want to believe it, i didnt either but it was true He made me out to be a complete obsessive ex, and to be honest, thats the way he was making me feel. I could feel my life revolving around him, not wanting to make plans with friends in the hope that at the last minute he would call and we could meet up. All he did was destroy my nights out and my chances of getting over him. You have to BE STRONG RIGHT NOW!!!!!!! Look at what he's doing to you, is this someone who deserves to get out and do what he wants plus having you incase he gets bored?? You're wasting your time on him instead of letting yourself heal and eventually find a great guy who will really love you. The more time you spend on this low life game player the longer the pain lasts. Trust me. Ive been there and did it for a whole year. A whole year of my life wasted that i'll never get back. Do it girl. Keep a calander and make a cross for every day that you dont speak to him. Try and get as many crosses in a row as you possibly can. YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!
  9. coolchick
    It sounds to me like you dont know what you want. Maybe a mid life crisis? You talk about the woman as the "girl next door" as in something exciting. Well im sorry, but it isnt. This woman hasnt spoken to you, perhaps because she has respect for her husband and wouldnt risk her family for a silly little fantasy that you're having. Why dont you try forgetting about her and focusing your attention on your wife? Try and spice up the love life between the two of you again. The most common reason for affairs and fantasys of others is because of what the existing relationship is lacking. Try surprising your wife, maybe book a nice meal and hotel afterwards. Book a holiday away and get her time off work, make it somewhere that neither of you would ever have thought of going to before and make it something different. Silly things will rebuild the sexiness of your wife and help you focus of your marriage, the excitement but with the woman who loves you and wants to be with you. Rather than this fantasy thing you have going on with a woman who doesnt even want to so much look at you because i garantee that her husband is not worth risking it for. Good luck x
  10. coolchick
    Im really sorry to be a bore in this post, since everyone else thinks its a good idea. I just had to say a few things that you would have to think about before you ask the sister out. (1) What if she says yes? Can you imagine the relationship, being around the family again except not with the girl you were once with but the other sister! (2) Being a part of the family again, means that you will have to go to parties and most definitely sit with your ex and her boyfriend. You know what boyfriends are like when they find out their girlfriend still spends time with their ex's! and (3) Can your girlfriend really relax and be intimate with you, knowing that you were once like that with her sister? Im sorry to be negative but i just want you to think about all these things before you ask her. Good luck!
  11. coolchick
    Give yourself a little time. Just relax and wait till the holiday comes. If you get paranoid about her being with someone else and constantly contact her, she'll start to feel claustraphobic and you could potentially push her even further away into the arms of another guy. You dont want that. Just concentrate on your job, a year isnt a long time and you'll have your licence back before you know it. The holiday right now is something that you both have to look forward to together Just relax until then. When the holiday comes, treat her good. Maybe even take her to the beach one night, nice and romantic, maybe after a meal, and tell her how much she means to you. The mistakes you made whilst together the last time and how much you realise that you want to spend your life with her. If that doesnt work then i dont know what will! You have to understand that this girl will be on edge for a while in case her heart gets broken again. Treat her with care and take things slowly.
  12. coolchick
    Please have confidence in yourself that you can rebuild your own life again. He's kicked you to the ground and by looking on his myspace you're just punishing yourself aswell. Basically just lying on the ground and having no way of getting up. Think about this, all the things he did to you last year, he got to do what he wanted to do, off enjoying himself and flirting with girls while you lay hurting. Now, when its you that wants him back, he's yet again out there enjoying himself while you're hurting. Does he have any emotions atall? It doesnt sound it. You're the one who's always in pain and he's enjoying every minute of it. Feeling like he's on a pedistool. Please, delete his number, force yourself to stop going on myspace. You should keep a little diary of each day that you successfully pass a day without checking it. It only hurts you. What you dont read cant hurt you. Keep yourself busy. Each time you're hurting, go to the gym, go swimming. Anything that stops you from having access to your phone and give yourself some alone time. You deserve it girl. Life is too short. x
  13. coolchick
    Dont worry! i just understand the hurt and heartache you're going through. I can feel the way you're stomach is in knots right now and eyes heavy. Every time your phone goes, your heart lurches hoping and praying its him Please whatever you do tho, DONT TEXT HIM! he'll just get annoyed, angry and begin to be irritated by you. He needs to miss you! He cant do that if you're contacting him all the time. You need to take a step back and keep yourself MAJOR busy. Spend time at the gym, swimming, anything that doesnt involve your phone or similar friends of your ex. I know that nothing people say to you will help as it wont take away your pain. Please look after yourself x
  14. coolchick
    Hi Colly, I understand exactly what pain you're going through right now, please read my past posts. My ex too left me, completely unaware and out of the blue for me. He just said like your ex said, he wants to be alone. Pm me if you'd like to talk x
  15. coolchick
    You should trick your husband into believing that you know more than you know and confront him about it. Put him on the spot and ask him upfront who he's being calling during these times he's went out. If he makes up lies simply tell him that you KNOW he's been calling her and if he doesnt tell you the truth you'll simply find out from someone else. You cant give him time to think about it tho, upfront face to face will show you if he's lying or not. After all you've been with him 9 years, you will know the signs. Good luck!
  16. coolchick
    Put on your favourite music really LOUD and boogie in your room to it! Thats what i always do when im down and it cheers me up so much haha!
  17. coolchick
    Thank you everyone thats replied, it was really nice to read some feedback and it made me feel better that there are people here who listen Thank you all. We dont need our ex's. Them being out our lives just makes more room for nice, genuine people to be in it instead
  18. coolchick
    Maybe you could leave it a bit and then text something like, "im sorry for what i said the other day, its not me, i was just having a real bad day and took it out on you. Hope you can forget it. Take care"..........then leave it to see what she says. Dont ever feel that you've lost your dignity. What she did to you was FAR WORSE. She's got to expect a little grief for the pain that she's done to you so dont worry.
  19. coolchick
    Hi everyone, I hope you can help me, i usually get my period around the 18th of the month. I got it last month that date too and finished on the 22nd july. For some reason, i felt heavy discharge today. When i got to the loo, i realised that its a lot of brown thick discharge. I had my period nearly 2 weeks ago and not due till the 18th again. Can anyone tell me what this is and maybe why i have it? Has anyone else ever got it? Thanks!
  20. coolchick
    Hey huni, I would honestly say to watch yourself with him. If he's just out of a relationship it sounds as tho he may be on the rebound and having withdrawal symptoms from sex. The way he's acting is showing exactly that and you dont want to be the person who ends up satisfying his need and then get hurt at the end of it. I know of people who enjoy just having sex with a person but the other person has more respect and feelings that the lad. Just go to public places and if its clear that he doesnt want to bother with this and just get down to it, then get out of the situation before you start maybe developing feelings for him. You deserve so much more respect girl x
  21. coolchick
    Hey everyone, Im not sure what else to say on here. Ive been visiting this website for a long time and have had a lot of amazing advice. Thank you all Tonight im just feeling really really sad and lonely. Thats the only problem about living in your own home, there's no one around to comfort you. Ive been thinking about my ex a lot and i just cant seem to stop. Ive tried keeping myself busy and going out and doing things but i cant get him out of my mind wherever i go Its been 4 months now and the pain is just as raw as the start. I would do anything to get that happiness back in my life again, to feel, well...normal i suppose. Just to walk about and do things without having pain in my heart and stomach. I long for it back more than anything in the world Sorry, just wanted to talk although im probably not making any sense lol x
  22. coolchick
    Dont be silly, you're always welcome to advice and you definitely havent created a bad impression. Every situation is different and you ended the relationship the way you did because of the way you were feeling at the time. Everyone does that. You arent any different to the normal person. At least you havent been cruel to him after it and flaunting other guys in front of him and putting him down to everyone. There are a lot worse situations out there. Dont worry!
  23. coolchick
    I know, thats just what they seem to do im afraid ive found tho that the more i dont contact my ex, the more he seems to text me first. I dont know if your like me, but i always feel weak around my ex. If im driving along and i see him behind me, my stomach starts knotting up and i feel nervous. I have no idea why. You really shouldnt beg your ex to get back, plz dont lower yourself into doing that. You have no need and he's not the only man on earth. You have the potential to have a fresh, happy new relationship. You shouldnt have to go begging anyone for anything. You are a person on the same level as him. Dont let him overpower you and put you back onto the ground again.
  24. coolchick
    The reason im saying to give it a try is that im the type of person to believe that you have to do it or you will live the rest of your life wondering "what if" and "if only i did this". Those 2 are the worst to think about. Thats why even after all the crap that my ex put me through i decided to give him another try and got the house together, because id always wonder if getting the house would have made us stronger. Now that he's left after only 6 weeks, my answer was confirmed and i knew that it didnt change his uping and leaving me any time he felt like it. I dont have any regrets tho as i know i can tell myself that i did everything i could. If your ex tells you that he doesnt want to be with you anymore and doesnt see a future then you know that you tried. You might be in pain but at least it wont be because you didnt try. My ex was also very much in control of me and always made me feel like i wasnt good enough for him. It made me lose my self esteem and felt that he was on this huge pedistool. But to be honest with you, when i think about things with a clear head, ive done well for myself career wise and im not a bad looking girl (although i still see faults in myself as everyone does). You have to remember the way he treated you and the bad things. If you get back together then IF you do finish, at least you know that he hasnt changed and that you are definitely able to do better for yourself. Good Luck girl x
  25. coolchick
    Hey sinead! me again haha have you got your ex's mobile number? Maybe you should send him a little text just in general, maybe "hey ### how you doing? Havent spoke to you in ages, you busy anytime soon? was thinking we could maybe meet up and catch up".......or something to that effect! Just make it casual and not as tho you're desperate to see him Just remember tho, take things slow and dont rush into anything. Good luck and let me know how you get on girl!
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