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MaybeThen

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Everything posted by MaybeThen

  1. I already saw her and “her ex” with plans to be together for a few weeks but the coronavirus thwarted it. I’m not surprised or hurt really. I think I got that all out over the months of posting here and not wanting to see the writing on the wall. I knew she had been messing with him for months. I finally admitted to myself that I just enjoyed whatever companionship I could get. We were supposed to meet in April but the virus interfered with that as well. Maybe for the best. She’s already done this to me. It was her immature grand finale. I was blocked and she removed me from all social media. But she didn’t block the account of my family business. I made contact with her from that account. Maybe a mistake, but I did. True. I’m surprised it lasted as long as it did. I definitely know I won’t end up with her in a romantic way, but I think we may meet as friends.
  2. Thank you. However, I’ve never sent her money. I don’t even make much money. The most I did was treat her when we spent time together, but what boyfriend would not? I don’t think I did anything unusual but I think deep down I knew she probably wouldn’t have been there with me had I not done that. I think in a way I paid for her company. Over the past few months I transitioned into seeing her more of a friend and potential traveling buddy than a romantic partner. The signs were there, she had started removing most of my photos from her social media and said we should stop with the displays of over the top affection in there. So now that it’s officially happened not too much has changed. Maybe an “I told you so” from the fellow posters here lol
  3. Well you guys were right. We lasted 7 months. A week or so ago she broke it off with me, in a very immature way. I had months to prepare for it thanks to this forum, so it didn’t come as a shock. We are still talking and interacting a bit. But I wanted to update this Incase anyone going through similar runs into my thread, don’t think we ran off and had a magical life, we did not :)
  4. My condolences. Being treated like that by a severely emotionally stunted adult is one of the worst feelings.
  5. Ok, well are you familiar with how it works? Because the same way per capita statistics work, is in theory the exact same way medical statistics work, including say, the % of people who die from the flu. How you explained it above is completely false and it misleads people. It’s like taking California vs Maryland: california is larger, and by that nature alone they have more homicides than Maryland. So to get the accurate homicide count in relation to Maryland you’d need to measure it “per capita.” And per capita, Maryland actually has more homicides than California in spite of it being a much smaller state. The flu may kill more people because more people have it, but “per capita,” Coronavirus is much deadlier. It’s got a 2% fatality rate, vs the flus .2%
  6. She says exactly why: he SENT THE PHOTOS TO HIMSELF. He used her phone to send the photos (jack off material) to himself, so he had to get rid of the evidence. So yes he was hiding something, and yes it makes all sorts of sense.
  7. This is false. Have you heard of the term, “per capita”?
  8. You sound like the type of guy who, when a woman is doing her job at work and smiles and greets you, a customer, you assume she’s got the hots for you and then you return to ask her out.
  9. But we all know why. He probably has the hots for your friend and woke up aroused and went hunting for nude material of her to jerk off to, he knew it was in there. Probably had been fantasizing about it for years. I’m not surprised you feel the way that you do. But I’m also surprised with how forthcoming he was about a lot of that. It’s nasty though, it’s one thing to use pornographic material of strangers, but his own wife’s friend? No class, and disrespectful.
  10. The Coronavirus is about 20% deadlier than the flu, actually. Just because more people have died from the flu thus far, doesn’t mean the Coronavirus isn’t a larger threat. 0.2% of people with the flu will die. With the Coronavirus, that number rises to 20% — And that’s only based off of the reported cases so far. It’s likely a higher %.
  11. I mean, you told her, “I don’t want to avoid commenting on posts or whatever.” The answer is usually the most simple...
  12. Ok, they return to any of the people from their past* This is extremely common behavior. Going back to a familiar place, someone who you know will furnish you with attention so you aren’t lonely. That’s what she’s doing.
  13. Common. People return to contact the most recent person that showed them attention prior to their now-ex. It eases their loneliness, offers them comfort, it’s a familiar place for them. They continue contact until they find a new partner.
  14. Does this not scare you a little? How can you have a successful relationship with someone who bases & compares their reality to fantasy characters? Exaggerated fiction written to play on people's emotions is not where one wants to derive their sense of how things should work from, it isn't a reflection of reality. When I first read your OP, I wondered if the spark she was looking for was based on the anime hobby you said the two of you were into. I was surprised by your ages, because I assumed you two would be around the 19-23 mark. This isn't a judgement, I am older than you and have acted much more foolishly. It just honestly sounds like she is operating in fantasy land. I just recently had to learn this lesson myself, so I empathize with you. Everything feels real, and right, and perfect, and then you realize that people are actors. Not necessarily maliciously, but emotions, and desire, and need, and want.. are tricky things. Sometimes people want to feel, and so they play the part. What I have learned is quick expressions of love that happen very early on feel good, but aren't necessarily a foundation for a relationship that will last. When you have no reason but to believe the other person is sincere in their expression, it feels like magic, like you've found "the one," but there's a host of reasons people may behave that way.
  15. It's a mind-boggling lesson, but be glad you learned it at a young age (I am assuming you are pretty young.) Humans are complex, and it just goes to show that a person's outward displays aren't always a manifestation of exactly what is going on in their minds. The good news is she was honest with you, and didn't lead you on. Even though you felt all of those amazing things, there is no use wanting to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you in that way. She gave you the gift of honesty, which seems to be a dying trait these days.
  16. Glad it worked out for you but I can't say that behavior, at least as far as what she and I did, is normal or healthy in any way. It sounds like the two of you are opened and aware about your behaviors and lingering attachments, but are working together to choose one another. Whatever works for you! I think the key there is that you are both aware and consenting. That is not the case with my and my gf, in fact it's been the opposite. All of this behavior has been done behind my back. We did spend Valentines weekend together, it was nice. I am just enjoying the company.
  17. None of this represents an apology, which is a change in behavior. You went into a building a couple of times so you could use the action as a bargaining tool. You never went to therapy to work on yourself, for yourself. You sat in a therapists office once or twice so you could throw it back on her face.
  18. Ok well I hope both of you are on birth control
  19. Wow people are awful. I’m sorry this happened
  20. Yes, but you are assigning a significance to it that isn't there. You keep insisting she's "reaching out" to play some love-tag game with you. A game you invented in your own mind, a game only you are playing. Reference: "Do you have my book?" would be classified under, "tidying up items"
  21. Oh great. You just gave him more gas to fuel a thousand more threads.
  22. It's confusing because you are rejecting reality. He, a tangible, interactive, human being, has told you he does not want to be married but you choose to ignore his request and seek an answer from the invisible, which ironically, appears to be repeating back to you exactly what your heart wants. The two answers conflict, so you become confused. Could it be that the universe's "signs/confirmations/etc" are really just a personal manifestation of your heart's desires and nothing more?
  23. This isn’t the mother. This is a woman he dated, assaulted, and constantly refuses boundaries she sets. She seems to be straddling a line between maintaining a friendship her daughter has with his son, and keeping him at bay. But he won’t listen. She’s the one who needs to cut ties and get her daughter some new friends /edit/ ok so the kids biological mother is the one who made that comment? Either way, it’s spot on. This guy is using his own son as a bargaining device. It’s sick.
  24. I see nothing wrong with what she wrote. He physically put his hands on her and consistently does the verbal equivalent. I’m sure those words came out of her mouth upon being pestered over and over and over by him. This guy is insane and is getting off to “bragging” about his antics to all of us under the guise of “wanting help.” She’s the one who needs to cut contact with him for her and her daughters own safety.
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