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confusedtyla

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  1. So I’ve been dating my boyfriend for over a year, I’m 23 and he’s 24. Before the terrible situation came about our relationship was really good. Our families love us together and we’re very involved in each our families lives. We’ve taken trips together and we’re really each others best friend. He’s the most patient man I ever met and he’s very caring and kind. So before the recent cheating I would have told you he’s a really good man, rare even. And i’ve dated some ****ty guys before. Now recently, I discovered he’s been communicating with this girl he met from twitter. Apparently the 2 have been heavily flirting and talking on the phone for months on and off. She even told me she’s speak to him while he was with his friends. However they never met before due to her living in a state 3 hours away. She claims he planned to meet her but never did. She told me she knew nothing of me and thought he was single. He claims in the midst of a rough patch we had (constantly arguing) he started talking to her as a way to talk to someone to have an escape. He claims he never intended on having sex with her nor meet her in person. He’s owned up to his mistakes however, he only has because he got caught. Its been a few days and he’s been calling and pleading every day to fix it and make it right. He claims he was stupid and says theres no excuse for what he’s done. He claims he was weak and didn't deal with his problems like he should and he cowardly went outside of our relationship to find an escape. He tells me he wants just one chance to change and fix everything. He’s offered to give me his passwords to his social media and phone. He told me he doesnt plan on going out with his friends until we’re okay. Until this incident, I never thought about him cheating. Of course we’ve had fights here and there, and recently more frequently but nothing worth being mad about for more than a day. Im struggling with this though because even though he didnt sleep with her, it still hurts me to know he even entertained another women and I cant help but wonder how long it wouldve gone on if I didnt catch him, would he have ended up meeting her? I want to take him back but I want him to struggle first. I want him to hurt and go through hell so he knows to never do this again. I’ve blocked him and rejected all his proposals of fixing this. Its been extremely hard because I really just want to give him the chance to make this right. He just sent me a long message about just wanting me to give him a chance and he’ll prove he’s worthy of it and all that jazz. I ended up blocking him and before I did, telling him how I love him and this will be the hardest thing ever. I feel like maybe I should make him feel like he’s really lost me before I give him a chance. I love him so much, I started to plan my future with him, I dont want to let him go but I don’t want less than I deserve. What should I do?? What would you do?? Leave him and move on? Or make him work hard to earn a second chance??
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