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confussed11

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  1. Thanks everyone for the advice. My gut tells me where this is heading - but I just can't do it to my boys. I grew up with divorced parents and I hated it. I also left my life in another city to be with her. It would be impossible having to restart my career at my age - now I know that is not a good reason to stay. At the end of the day - I still love her, I know that sounds strange after what has happened. Marriage counselling seems the way - but she is so reluctant to go. She gets so defensive : (
  2. Yes, we have been together since 2005 - and I have been loyal that whole time.
  3. My wife and I have been married for 9 years and have 2 beautiful sons. A few years back, I suspected that she was cheating on me - there was a 6 month period after out first son was born that my wife kept going out with friends. I was fine with it at the time - I wanted her to go out and have fun with the girls. But each of the times that she went out, I was getting weird stories. Things weren't adding up. Secret message from other guys. Adding new guys on social media accounts. Finding out she was meeting a guy at the gym. When I approached her about all of the issues, she admitted that one night while at a work conference she had too much to drink and her boss had kissed her. With the other times, she thought it was a bit of harmless fun 'chatting' to guys while she was out. She didn't think anything of it at the time - she had even accused me of having an affair because I was late home from work once. After some counselling, we seemed to get back the spark and we then had our 2nd child. That was about 3 years ago... but recently, she went to a hens night. Prior to the weekend, she seemed a bit sketchy. Details were changing, she was going off to other rooms to make plans. A lot more time spent on social media. Then after the weekend, she started becoming more sexual towards me.. stuff that she wouldn't normally do. This lasted for a week and then... nothing. Curiosity got the better of me and I stupidly checked her phone when she was in the shower. I found that on the night of the hens night she was messaging a guy (a male model... I'm assuming he was the entertainment for the night). They were messaging about meeting up at a night club. She called me shortly after to tell me that the hens night has been pretty tame and she might call it a night. Then 2 minutes after she got off the phone with me, she messaged the guy back to confirm where he was. Now, I don't know what happened... but he was messaging her back at 530 the next morning. I really don't know what to do. If I confront her about it, she would just deny like the other time. Or do I just keep my mouth shut and hope that this doesn't happen again? Thanks in advance for any advice.
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