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About drivenfuture

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  1. Thanks for the info--as such in my case I did g treatment--and the episode was my only one. I was taken off meds several months later. I do feel more confident that I will be aware whats happening next time.
  2. I think there were a few things missed from a few of the posts reading through--so this is meant to be a clarification for a few of the last posts. I do believe that I may have been "overbearing" in the sense of being annoying; though at the time it was happening I was not aware. Although the pastor's children and I were very close in age, I was slightly older and leading the youth group (the youth pastor convinced me to be a helper and then shortly after I joined, he quit). So, I knew the pastor's children from 15-18, 16-19, and 18-21 where I was 20-23. The cutoff came before I ever displ
  3. to be clear here...this whole post was based on the idea that I've let them go, I haven't contacted them in 2 years, and I've even blocked them on social media. But despite all this, I can't stop thinking about them. Even so, my main quandry here had more to do with the fact that this pastor spent years preaching valuing relationships and loving those you don't like and never severing relationships, even putting me in leadership to teach those same things; only for him to break my trust with his teachings of loyalty. Your response seems to be a typical non-Christian answer; but in the Bible
  4. Here is the message spaced out (hopefully; I'm not good with these things).
  5. tried, looks like the time limit expired so it won't let me make changes; sorry.
  6. This is pure torture. There's so much to this story that it might be hard to keep track with. I was friends with the pastor's daughter--and I stress friends--we never did anything that suggested otherwise---literally all we did is talk online and at church. Admittedly, looking back, it did seem a bit one-sided after a while. Perhaps I was annoying or something. We were friends for roughly 5 years...but one nuance here--she happens to be the daughter of a pastor. I never had any altercations with any church member. But after 5 years, in what felt out of the blue to me, she and he sister
  7. I had a pretty huge falling out with this girl--she was the pastor's daughter. the thing is, I'm not really sure what to think. We had been friends for 5 years or so and never had any issues that I was aware of. Then one day randomly she ignored me and her brother approached me and said I was barely tolerable. I should mention there were more events after this but I'm having a very hard time piecing together everything that happened, but will discuss what I do know. So, for those who don't know, the phrase "barely tolerable" I knew to be a direct reference to one of her favorite books, Pride
  8. we just started dating and recently had sex for the first time...and now my landlord is raising rent too much and I have to move. How am I gonna tell her...I feel horrible.
  9. I didn't say it was healthy...I'm just saying it may not be as bad as everyone is making it seem.
  10. Let's be fair here...while it doesn't look promising, I know myself and I can honestly say that the way I deal with conflict can be avoidance. There are many times I dealt with issues by locking myself away in my room playing video games for hours--or going to the gym, or the library...because either I was feeling smothered or there was an issue I was avoiding. HOWEVER, I can attest that the secretive passwords probably is something you won't like--could be pornography...could be having "emotional affairs" with women...he could be talking with them without ever having visited them---for me t
  11. The only ones here that potentially apply is the experience factor...and possibly undiagnosed diabetes...I'm not sure about the anxiety, maybe she had anxiety but I thought I was fine.
  12. yep...and then she agreed to watch a movie at my place and a few minute into the movie jumped on top of me....so yeah.
  13. 35 My first time was fine...I don't really have any emotions attached to that really...though that girl pursued me very heavily. I'm not grieving over an ex per se...but I am still battling with emotions to a family of friends I lost some time ago...a pastoral family...but in particular it heavily involved one of the girls of that family...we were just friends but I had a hard time with the friend breakup. The current girl doesn't remind me of anyone from my past...like at all. Yes I watch porn pretty regularly.
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