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Mazen303

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  1. Thanks again for replies and taking time out to read my long paragraphs...really appreciate it. No he is not a rebound but I can understand why people are thinking that way. When I said I met him whilst I was going through a break up I didn’t mean I met him the very next day and grabbed him because he was the first one to come along. Healing from break ups takes some time and there is no set time for anyone. I met my fiancé around 8/9 months after my break up and in between that time I had a few guys interested in me who I rejected because I was trying to find myself, to heal and be happy on my own. When I said my fiancé helped to heal me it meant that he helped me to see that not all men are jerks and decent men do exist, it made me hopeful for the future. I’m not co-dependent on him...it’s a long distance relationship anyway so it’s not like I’m constantly stuck to him like a leech to make myself happy. I have the right to move on in life so I did when he came along. Yes I am going to start networking and go for workshops to improve my interview skills. And FYI I have applied for basic jobs at Tesco etc. but what I probably did wrong was leaving my legal qualifications on my CV which is the main reason for my rejection as per the feedback I get after the interviews - it goes something along the lines of “we found you to be overqualified for this role...we have found someone more suited for this role but don’t worry we’ve kept your details on our system for any future opportunities” ... This makes me think maybe I would be better off getting rid of my legal qualifications and be dishonest as honesty isn’t getting me anywhere?! Anyway, most people on here have said I need to spend more time with my fiancé so I’ve decided to go stay in Pakistan for a couple of months. I will get to know him more that way plus it’s easier to get a legal job in pakistan so at least I’ll be earning and can gain some legal exposure. I spoke to a solicitor yesterday and he told me about a different immigration route by which if I stay in pakistan for a couple of months I can get entry clearance for my fiancé and come back to the UK with him. Sounds good.
  2. Hi everyone thanks for your replies...I'm going to try and clarify some things and try to answer questions people have raised so you can know the situation better ... 1- My unemployment- I am not on any benefits. My dad has his own business and provides for me and my younger sister (12 years old) at the moment whilst I am unemployed. I qualified as a Solicitor last May after completing 2 years of training with a high street firm. However, I left my job last June because I was getting bullied by the owner and his wife ...I put up with it for two years because legal training contracts are extremely difficult to find and I didn't want to lose the opportunity. Now, because I left my job straight after qualifying I am unable to secure another legal job as a solicitor since they all require 2-3 years Post Qualification Experience which I don't have. I apply for other jobs too in the legal field such as paralegal roles and even apply for unrelated jobs like admin and sales roles but the recruiters always question why I am looking for such jobs when I am a qualified solicitor and reject me.... 2- Living in Fiance's country- Well he is in Pakistan and has his own Oils and Car Lubricants business there and earns about £2000 per month through his business. He is quite well off there but the Home Office will not take his earnings into consideration. He has a big house and lives with his family (mother, father, sister, brother, brother's wife) as per the cultural norm there. His mother wants me to move to Pakistan after marriage because his family are not interested in sending him to the UK permanently. He wasn't much interested in coming to the UK either because he has his set up and business there in Pakistan but nonetheless he decided to come to the UK permanently for me if I don't want to move to Pakistan. Sorry if I sound rude but I really don't like fiance's mother, she is too controlling and stubborn always wants things her way so I can't go live in Pakistan as I would have to share a house with her. Also, Pakistan is not as developed as the UK and I don't want my future children to be deprived of things such as good education or healthcare by living in Pakistan when they have the option to be born and brought up in the UK. Fiance agrees with our future kids' wellbeing so that's why we decided it's best if he comes here and we have a family life in the UK. 3- Rushing into marriage- I have full faith he isn't using me to find a way to settle in the UK. He is my best friend's cousin. She introduced us and I know she wouldn't introduce me to him if he was not genuine. I've known my best friend since secondary school and I trust her. I feel my fiance genuinely loves and cares for me ... when I met him last year I was going through a traumatic break up with my ex of 5 years who left me for another girl and married her 4 months after breaking up with me. I was hurt and broken and my fiance came into my life like a ray of hope...he helped to heal me...showed me that I could be loved and that I was not some piece of that would be dumped whenever which is what I felt like after my ex left me. He is definitely a better man than my ex. I've been on about 3 holidays with my fiance since meeting him last year so it's not like I haven't spent any time with him and am rushing into something after one meeting. Guys, he is a good man....it's just that me not being able to find a job for us to be together is really frustrating and at times I feel like maybe if it's so difficult to be together we should just break up...but at the same time I don't want to break his heart and do to him what my ex did to me....
  3. extremely frustrating situation....I met my fiancé last year in July while he was here in London on a visit visa ... we have been in a long distance relationship since then and I recently visited his home country where we got engaged. He’s perfect for me and we both love each other. Now the problem is that because of the UK immigration rules I will have to earn a minimum of £18600 a year so that my fiancé can join me here in the UK and we can finally be together. I have no job...I’ve been applying since January without any luck and it’s June now ... I will need 6 months of payslips to send off with fiancé’s visa application... we were planning on getting married this December so as per the calculation I would need to start working in July for my 6 months of payslips to be accumulated by December and we can finally send them off to the Home Office... but the December wedding plan seems doomed because there is no sign of a job yet ... I keep getting invited for interviews and then get rejected ... I feel like my life is on hold because everything is dependent on that one stupid job ...I can’t marry until I have that job and 6 months of payslips..I have no idea when I will get a job and when this 6 month countdown will even begin...I’m 29 I want to be married soon and have kids start a family but it all seems impossible. I feel like there is so much pressure on me...I get frustrated at my fiancé at times as I feel he isn’t making an effort to come to the UK since he knows I’m not being able to find a job. I spoke to him about getting a student visa but he is not interested in studying further and doesn’t want to waste his money on studies so he isn’t interested in that .... asked him to find a job in a different country so we could live there for a couple of years then return to the UK via a different immigration route but he’s not interested in moving to a different country. He is saying we will wait until I get a job then we can get married and he will come to the UK...but I just don’t know how long this whole thing will take....
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