lonelyone

Thanks you guys for the advice. I didn't have an affair because I knew it was the wrong thing to do, but when somebody else is paying you more attention than your own partner, it can become overwhelming. I finally found the words to confront him again about our situation. I even told him that it felt like things have gotten so bad between us that i was thinking about asking for a divorce or having an affair and that I didn't because I loved him and wanted him but his response wasn't like someone who was truly hurt that his wife would be telling him this. I even told him that I found him extremely attractive if that was the problem and that I just wanted him to show me some kind of intimacy every now and then like a kiss, a hug or even holding my hand in public. I asked why he doesn't make love to me anymore and all he could say was "I don't know" and that it wasn't going to get any better. So, I guess in a way, that was my answer. I guess I was hoping that he would say, "lets work this out". Didn't happen...so now I'm waiting to see if anything works out or anything better happens by the end of May. If not, then I'm going home after my son's last day of school here. Any other advice is greatly appreciated...Thank you again Shazza,AppolloCreed71 and ReadyorNot.

Hi everyone, This is my first time posting and I'm not sure if I should use this forum or the relationship forum. Here is my problem. I've been married for 3 years. My husband rarely has sex with me. I don't know if he is just not interested in me anymore or what is going on. I asked him a few times if there was something going on but he says no. We walk around each other most of the time without uttering one word to each other. He never wants to spend time with me and son. We get invited to family outings or BBQ and he never wants to go. My friends notice that I'm alone all the time and that I'm sad and tired of making up a lie of why he didn't want to come. I thought maybe it was because i don't work. I tried working but it didn't work. I did everything around the house including yard work and worked a job. He still didn't come around. It was worse. I can't prove that he is having a relationship outside of us because he is always at home after work. However, he does get an hour and a half lunch break everyday and he never comes home. I don't think his sex drive is down because I have found hundreds of porn websites that he visits. Some I have found out that he has paid membership to. I can literally walk around the house almost naked and he doesn't show "any" interest whatsoever. I am only 31 and he is 34 so I don't quite get it. Usually they say a woman's desire for sex fade after a hysterectomy. Not mine! I find myself wanting it more. He shows no intimacy towards me either. No hugs no kisses, no cuddling in bed...he turns his back to me. My friends have arranged times where my son stays at their house so that we can be alone and he in turns goes to bed and goes to sleep before I get out of the shower. I really don't know how to talk to him or what to say. I've tried to be playful or come on to him, but he just says "girl, stop playin". He's is a weight fanatic. He constantly asks me how he looks. He's a perfect size. I've gained weight, so maybe thats it. Well now i'm to the point where I cry all the time in bed or when I'm alone. I'm wanting to leave my married but don't no if its a mistake or want to have an affair but I have too big of a conscience. Does any man or woman think that he could possibly have interest somewhere else or just want to leave this marriage himself and don't know how to tell me? I need help really bad. sorry this was so long. Please help