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Nash82

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About Nash82

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  1. God this is tough. Every time I feel like I'm pushing through, I feel utterly despondent. She's been on her mini solo break since Tuesday. I haven't messaged her once. She did call on the first night to discuss money for the trip (although we'd already discussed it). As I said before, I was polite and didn't get involved into a big convo. She's been messaging and talking to our daughters whilst away. Seems to be relaxing. She's back tomorrow afternoon. Not sure how to deal with things when she does. Whether to just keep contact to discussing the girls and money or not. I know she'll want to
  2. Hope for the best, plan for the worst has become my motto. Just got to say, thank you to everyone for advice and support. Honestly, this place (after reading other threads too) is extremely helpful. People are still willing to say it how it is, but there aren't people going out of their way to make others feel bad like I've seen on other sites. I'll keep posting as it helps me process my thoughts, but also to keep people updated and help others where I can.
  3. Thanks for the replies everyone. @lostandhurt I definitely see what you're saying and have already made steps in the right direction. The house work takes up a lot if time anyway (really has opened my eyes as to how lazy I was before she left). I am working out more than usual too - more to take my mind off of things than anything. Also shaving my head more often too (have a shaved head, but usually just let it grow scruffy before sorting it). She's away for her mini mind-clearing break from today. I messaged to say I wouldn't be messaging her as it's best to just move on (slightly b
  4. Yeah. I can see how the going away might seem like a red flag. I truly believe that it's just by herself (her dad is driving her, it's a single bed place she's staying at etc). Although I'll be prepared for anything. We spent pretty much every single day for 18 years together. I think she just wants space and she wants this short time to clear her head. I'm hoping that she's able to do that.
  5. Well, did she even give you a chance to remedy by having that talk with you or did she just up and leave and then tell you why she was? It makes a big difference in how I would advise. Give her space, don't "date" her... she left you after all. Keep convos about the kids and support etc. She has no idea what it will be without you so give her the gift of finding out. Tbh, she didn't ever really say outright when we were together. I guess lack of proper communication was another issue. She was hurt because she loved me so much (her words) but didn't feel that she was enough for me (
  6. Definitely. I've already decided to not contact her when she's away. I will send her a short message explaining why as we've been messaging every day so it would be odd to not say a thing. We've got a birthday for our daughter coming up in a week though and I know she wants to still do some other things as a family unit. I want that too as it's good for the kids. It's hard though. I don't want to push her away more by not doing the activities together, but it hurts so much after when she leaves again.
  7. There were signs now that I look back. As I said, I was able to work out the reasons pretty quickly. I just chose to bury those thoughts and not deal with them. She has said she won't come back because she can't be hurt again. I hate myself for ruining this, but she's so strong-willed that she rarely goes back on a decision. It's hardest because I know there are still some feelings there and I just find it impossible to give up hope even when I know I should.
  8. As the title says. My wife of 14 years (18 years together) left me about 4 weeks ago. She told me she just didn't feel the same way anymore. The first day I did all of the emotional things you'd expect - very needy, emotional, a little begging etc. As we can't afford two places to live, she moved in with her parents (about 10 minute drive away) because I don't have family where we live. It's been the hardest four weeks of my life. There are occasions when I don't feel like total garbage, but pretty much all day long all I can do is think about her. I took stock of why she might have falle
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