So_sorry

Thanks so much for the advice guys, but I don't feel like I can go and talk to anyone about my feeling because I will be judged. I also don't want them to know that I am weak. I'm not the strong person they think I am. Those things they think make me so strong only make me depressed. I have gotten myself out of situations physically, but emotionally I am still that little girl. I just want to live a happy normal life and I am, but really I'm not. Maybe I think of the past too much, but how can I get over it. Its like the things that happen to me I can't get over. Everyone else can but not me, because I am weak. The thing I've done that was wrong I can't get over that either. I'm not sweet and innocent like people think. I'm just stressed and depressed, but let me stop going on before someone suggest I go to the mental hospital.

Lately I have been feeling really depressed. Its like I have so many different emotions, and so many things going on in my head. I am at battle with myself. I'm sure I'm not making any since, but I am over whelmed with emotions, and I just don't know how to deal. I have done somethings that I'm not to proud of, but at the same time I'm currently doing good things that would make people happy to be me. I'm not a terrible person, but I sometimes feel like I am because of my pass. Today I feel like I hate myself and I just don't feel happy. Its like I am so tired of being me. I'm tired of pretending to be happy when I really want to crawl up and cry. People think of me as this strong person, because of things I've been through well I don't feel strong. I NEED a shoulder to cry on.

All I have to say is I have been where you are, and I have even tried taking my life before. Life my seem useless right now, but I promise you it gets better. All this is now is a test that you must pass to get to that good point in your life. If you kill yourself you will fail the test. I promise you life will get better and whatever it is that you are going through right now there are people who have it worst. SO..... Don't fail the test be strong and if you need someone to talk to feel free to Pm me.

The solution to your problem is simple... 1. Get a job 2. Get your license if you don't have it already. 3. Get you a car 4. Get your own place Your a adult so they cannot stop you from doing these things, but while you are still living in their home you must follow their rules.

Oh if you need someone to talk to or need some encouragement feel free to PM me. anytime 8)

You are currently on the right path all you need to do is keep following down it. You have to work on your communication skills right now so lets wait a little while for the girl friend. Where do you work??? You can start with talking to people at your job. You know just friendly conversation and from there than maybe you can join some sort of club like the above poster suggested. You made it this far so I'm sure you will do just great. Just remember to never give up and these things take time. Good luck

Beec I am trying so hard to find out what is missing and bring it back, but it easier said than done. We go out ever single week end without the kids and I have been trying to make our sex life better. I will continue to try and if nothing work I guess I will just have to walk away from my marriage.

You need to talk to him and let him know that you aren't ready to be friends yet, because your not compeletly over him. I am sure he will understand and stop calling.

sounds to me like he is dropping huge hints

So I have never really been the jealous type, but recently I notice I have been having issues. I cheated on my husband (never actually having sex, but its still considered cheating) now everytime he leaves I think he could be going to see another woman. It's like I expect him to pay me back for what I did. I don't think he knows about this, but what can I do to stop? I know that if I keep thinking like this its going to push me further and further away from him. Any advice will be helpful. Thanks in advance.....

I was thinking of meeting him in a public place. Does that sound okay? and should I let my husband know that I plan o doing this?

I have a scar on my forehead. Its kinda large and people are always asking me what happen. Don't feel bad about your scars. At least there not smack died on your forehead. They could have been worst. Count yourself blessed.

Beec I'm a bit confused, so by doing this I will forget about the other guy????? I also have another question being that I broke it off without saying good-bye or without an explaination. Do you think I should see him again. I mean just to explain to him whats going on. Basically to him it may seem like I just desappeared. Maybe if I get some closer there I will be able to go on with my husband. I don't know what do you think???

Beec I got your private message and you keep saying I brought this on myself. Well I know I was wrong, but like I stated before my husband wasn't always so nice. He use to always tell me to go find a boyfriend and he never spent time with me. Thats way he blames himself for me cheating. He also told me to go have sex with someone else, but I never listened to that. He isn't that jerk anymore which is why I am staying with him. Now days he reminds me of the man I married. I just wanted to clear that up with you, so that you can better understand why I did what I did and that my husband is also partly to blame. If I told the whole story I'd be going on forever, but there is more than just that. We were having some serious problems with his temper and him not coming home some nights. But I think you get the point.

I don't think your silly... Like I told someone else on here it is possible to forgive, but not forget. As long as you aren't bringing it up in his face than your okay. I think he is wrong for blaming you and he needs to take reponsibilty for his OWN actions. Maybe you should try counceling.