edward

link removed Just in case anyone has missed it !

I would like to thank everyone who has read or replied to this post. I have also found reading posts from other people very healing. The death of my marriage to my wife seems all but over, still hurts always will but i'm holding in there for now.Thanks to this brilliant web site and the people on it I am on the move. I want have access to a computor so i'll say my good byes now.Thank you all. Edward.

I would like to thank everyone who has read or replied to this post. I have also found reading posts from other people very healing. The death of my marriage to my wife seems all but over, still hurts always will but i'm holding in there for now.Thanks to this brilliant web site and the people on it I am on the move. I want have access to a computor so i'll say my good byes now.Thank you all. Edward.

ilse, thanks for your reply. In answer to your question my wife has not had a easy inning( as they say in cricket) and has suffered with numerious problems, all one way or another due to lack of minus confindance. It's only recently ( 18 months ) that she has really started to get much better. Which is great in one way but...... You could say her life has taken a new turning point but without me. she says we might get back but again my gut reaction is we will not. letting me down easy maybe?

"How can u love and hate a person in equal messures" Was a previous topic i posted. If i'm breaking any rules please except my appoliges now but i have got to say this last thing. Today my wife has given me the answer i never wanted to here. At first she was unsure but she now tells me that she is definitely no longer in love with me and wants to and has ended are marriage. The thought of comeing home every night knowing she want be pleased or waiting for me when i get in hurts.(i can't aford to move out yet! just to make it more painfull).Haveing my marriage ended for me with no say, makes me very angry.She has said she told me, sort of! what does sort of mean what half tried.I feel cheated, not given a chance to try as a couple.She should have told me load and clear,she didn't, she gave up on us and our family.I had a wright to know, by not telling me how she felt we couldn't try and work it out,at least give a go.Relate,Counciling something.I can't believe the women i love has dumpt me so heartlessly after years of surporting her phobias and anxity.I don't know if i can or want to carry on.

I was / am married to someone who wants to "see how she feels" it's just a polite british way of saying "It's finished" but who am i but a sad 40yrs old. good luck. Keep happy life does go on.

Thanks for all your comments and words of advice. I will us them over the coming months along with all the advice i have received. I hope i start to function properly soon, get back to work etc but it is very hard when you are still liveing in the same house. I know some might say i have to get out but there is my daughters especially the youngest! Then there is the money, i can't afford £400 rent plus my own morgage and everything else. My "wife" is at the very early stages of getting out. She has never worked, used public transport the hole thing is a mess. but it's great to think i'm not the only one. Which of corse i knew but thanks again for spending the time reading and replying.

no, but if he has always treated u ok try and be gentle. If not do yourself a faver and let him go

she says,I don't know. You tell me what that means, i think i know looks like i'm no longer in that dame circle of trust or love. 23yrs surporting her panic attacks,and just when she starts to feel able to get out of the house,it's a case thanks for being there all those yrs but i'm off. yet i still feel sorry her! sad or what

I have known my wife for more than 25 yrs, Married 23yrs! this yrs. Like most marriages there have been bad & good. For a good part,but not all she has been unable to get out of the house. suffering years of unfare anxity, panic attacks and a general inability to live what most people would call a "normal life" what ever normal means. So she has had it bad.My life went on but i always made it around our problem, because as husband and wife( for better and worse ) it was our problem and i did and still love her. Four weeks ago I ask her is everything ok, ok between us. Her reply has taken me to lows I never could exist. As a "MAN" i thought i can handle most if not all situations that came way.Wrong wrong wrong! My heart actually feels like it is being ripped out. my hands shake.I can't sleep without takeing Tablets and then i'm up at three in the morning. So here I am pooring my life story out to who? for what? Life stinks & Love stinks. How can u Love & Hate someone in equal messures.