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About kristiechane

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  • Birthday January 15
  1. Yeah I think I am done setting my expectations high. I think that thinking of what we could have been is what made me feel hurt the most. Want to learn how to keep myself emotionally detached until he (or anyone else for that matter) has proven to be trustworthy. I think it really is my expectations that hurt me the most. I also don't think I was that important to him either, which sucks but I think I am learning to accept it. I did call this a "summer fling" because it was totally undefined and I didn't communicate any boundaries or expectations. I felt really naive for that but I am tryi
  2. Yes you're so right. I think I got attached because we communicated so much and it felt like I had a good friend instead of just someone to sleep with. In the future, if sex is all I want, I will definitely not keep contact like I did with him, cause that is what made me catch feelings for him I think. And yeah I see your point about the "hello", I just felt bad since I ignored his other message he sent a month ago. I never think about the mass texting aspect of it, that really helps put things into perspective, and explains why he was so quick to drop contact after a little time the 1st t
  3. Yeah the "no closure" thing is what bothers me the most. I always feel like I should have an explanation to finally be satisfied but I think I just have to accept that I probably won't get one. I don't want to make him out as the bad guy because he probably has no clue how I feel since I didn't communicate that to him clearly. I need to get better at that for sure. I just want to know what he wants clearly so then I can make my decision and go. I think I am just hoping he wants more but his actions are not showing me that, so I think I can just take that as my "closure". I think if he
  4. You're totally right, I also think it was lame looking back. But I still wasn't over him so I guess why I thought it was ok. Thank you.
  5. This is what I thought thank you. :( His behavior really made me think that I did something wrong because he was not like this when we first started talking and would call and text me all throughout the day and was enthusiastic. I just don't know what changed :( Should I block him if he doesn't reply in a few days and end everything there or try to reach out and gain closure from the situation before moving on for good?
  6. I had a summer fling with this guy at work last summer who was my first everything. I caught feelings hard, but had to go back to school and he didn't seem interested in continuing (lack of contact) so I took the hint and was incredibly sad but tried to get over him. Early December he reached out on Snapchat (said he lost my number), I was really surprised and happy to hear from him and we caught up and joke around a bit which was nice, and he alluded to seeing me after my semester was over. 2 days later he texts me his number on Snapchat and we text for a bit before he tells me to call him la
  7. My therapist said the same thing about romance. It's like I want to experience it, but I am also afraid of it. I guess it just comes down to how willing I am to take the risk. I just want the reward to be worth the risk and I am honestly not always sure that it is. I don't think there is more joy to be had, as I think we just grew apart. Before I saw him almost everyday and if not then we were always on the phone and texting. I just feel like the dynamic changed and I am just not as open as before due to feeling hurt. I think I'll just take this experience as a lesson in the future. Ye
  8. I really wish I didn't fear getting hurt. I just really hate feeling rejected/heartbroken sooo much and would like to avoid it as much as possible. Looking back, I am actually somewhat glad I went through this though, because it taught me a lot but the process was painful :( Maybe it felt so bad because it was the first time I dealt with something like this. I think I can handle rejection/hurt feelings better in the future, I just don't want to get jaded/cynical... Yeah I do need to stop assuming, and I did ask him why, and he said he was "wondering what I was doing/where I was". I didn
  9. Yeah I figured it was because of this. I don't know if I have it in me to block him yet but I did delete his contact and messages. I'll hopefully get there. Thank you!
  10. It's ok! I think I am just going to move on, I definitely have more confidence to do so after hearing all of your advice so thank you so much for that!
  11. Wow. I really needed this. Thank you so much. It is definitely becoming clear to me now that he isn't interested in me, which although it hurt at first I am coming to terms with it. I would just think that as a decent person, one would just leave someone alone if they were not interested, rather than come in their life again to lead them on/use them for their ego. I think now hearing everyone's advice and seeing the situation, I am slowly getting him off that pedestal and giving him the benefit of the doubt. I definitely had rose-colored glasses when it came to observing his behavior but n
  12. You are right, I was making excuses for his behavior. I think I was just hoping for more, thinking that things could go back to the way they were when we first started talking. I know I deserve better than that. It's just hard to admit that he was probably using me, as I hoped he would care more about me than to do something like that. Thank you :)
  13. Thank you :) I do think a fling can be fun, and like the idea of it, just haven't learned to not get my feelings involved yet. Maybe one day. Until then, I think I'll take your advice to not explore it right now.
  14. Yeah my friend told me that he probably was going through a "dry spell" and that is why he messaged me. Makes me feel like a bit like a last resort though :( I am not sure if I can handle another fling that will inevitably end, as I tend to get invested easily so maybe I will just let it go. Thank you for the advice.
  15. I didn't reach out because I was afraid of his possible non-response, as when we were involved before, near the end he wouldn't respond to my texts which hurt my feelings a bit. While I am somewhat interested, I am also cautious of getting my feelings involved again and felt that if he wanted something again, he should be the one taking more initiative steps since he reached out. Is that wrong? The last time I got invested he got distant so I was afraid of getting too invested again. I don't want to regret letting it go but at the same time I am hesitant to get my feelings involved agai
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