NeverToHaveLovedAtAll

Evening ladies and gentlemen. Been awhile since I have been around this forum, so I thought I would divulge my latest relationship dilemma. I am currently taking a summer school class to get ahead. (Just want everyone to know that yes people do take summer classes to get ahead and also to show that I am not imcompetent in my studies. ) There is a very lovely female that sits directly adjacent to me and I cannot help but occasionly take a glance over at her. Beautiful smile, great sense of fashion that she actually demonstrates...daily, and a sense of humor that would make Ben Affleck look like a comedian. All around, a very personable opposite. My dilemma seems to be that we only have two days of classes left and I want to get to know her better. I have never had a problem in the past with picking up women, but I just feel a little off my game lately. Any suggestions as to how to approach her about hanging out some time? I have talked with her on several occasions, so she knows that I exist...which is a plus. Just want to make a nice gesture that gets her to smile and gets her a date with me. After that, I believe I can take it from there. Idea that has crossed my mind: Leave a rose on her desk that asks her out for some kind of activity and asks her to look behind her when she comes up with an answer to the question. Simple smile should scream "yes" and the look like you are disgusting, will tell me to start running. LOL! Any help would be appreciated.

I will kind of throw this in because it is part of what defines me. I have been called a "gentlemen's gentlemen" many times before. At a certain point, I came to believe that that was true. So, with that said, I want this to be a great experience for her. Anything that would help, i.e. - a certain kind of condom (i hate having to many choices...they market more kinds to confuse you more!), etc etc.

I will be truthful here. It's almost a right of a passage as a guy. I think that a guy that carries a condom with him is secure enough with himself to carry it around. But, here is the question I pose, why do men normally only carry one?

Well, I myself am I virgin. And like smallworld said, I am looking for the right person and waiting for the right time. I am not trying to build it up to be something incredibly spectacular...I just want it to be with someone I love. I am one of those people that will let a women know at a certain point in the relationship. So, truth to be told, do not hold your breathe for a guy to be upfront with you about his past sexual encounters. Patience is a virtue.

Good evening. I have been having some mixed emotions lately about sex. To give you a bit of background on myself, I am 19 years old, a male, and I am a virgin. During my whole life I have had the idea that I would only have sex when I was truly in love. And I believe that that time has arrived. I am not trying to talk this to death or anything, I just want to be smart about all this going into it. Now, she is has had one sexual relationship; and I have had none. I know that does not make for a problem, so I am not worried. I guess my question to the world is, how do Iprepare myself for something like this? I know about contraception and that is the least of my concerns. I am smart guy, so I will act responsibly about this. I guess I just want to know what I should know turning this into a sexual relationship? Also, to clarify a matter, we have both already discussed that we are ready for such a step forward. Any thoughts or inisight would be much appreciated. Happy Holidays and thanks for your time.

Please can I have some more advice here!

It was the year 2000. I was in 8th grade in Arizona and was like any other 12-13 yr old guy...girls had coodies and that was that. But, during the last few months of 8th grade, I met this girl that ROCKED MY WORLD! Lets just say that she changed my perspective about the female gender. And I must say, a hard thing to do at that age. We "dated" (held hands and did NOT kiss) for the duration of the school year. We had to break up since I was moving away at the end of the school year. It literally tore me apart at that age. But, the heart does go on. Of course, times must change and I have changed along with it. It is now, December 17, 2005 and life has been a tad difficult for me to face lately. My father has been diagnosed with cancer and ever since that news, nothing has really made sense to me anymore. You gain this certain understanding that life will never be the same and that you are powerless to change it. I am not saying that this is the way I feel, I am just saying that that is the way...I should feel. There are not many things in the world that still bring a smile accross my face. And I feel, that if I find something that does make me happy, I have to hold it to my heart as hard as a can to hope that it will never leave my side. With that being said, this is where the story begins... About a year ago, I moved to Arizona to help my dad during his "ordeal." I knew it was something I had to do, but in the same sense, I never, never, never, felt obligated at all. I had to do this for me, because I never knew what was going to happen to him. But, I never felt alone. There was this women, named Amy, the same girl from 8th grade, that made my world light up again. When I moved back, she was the first person to make me feel alive again. She made me understand why I was here on this Earth. Is that even humanly possible? For someone to make you feel that way. If so, I would have never thought it could happen until she came around. Now, at the time, when I moved back, she had a VERY steady boyfriend. I told her that I liked her and that did not go over particularly well. She knew that I put her in a bad position and lets just say that we did not talk for a VERY long time. Now, 7 months later, she has reentered my life. She goes to school about 2 hours away from me. But, now, she is home for the holidays. We have been talking for about the past month and she has had a recent breakup with her ex-boyfriend. It was a long time coming, so I really was not very surprised. They had been on a "break" for the past month. He told her that he was not sure how he felt about her anymore and that just lit a fire under her * * *. She told him she was done and that this was not worth her time any longer. She said she'd give it till the holidays and then see how both of them felt. She had a couple flings with that "break". Lets just say that the passion was no longer there. Something myself, and some of her other friends have told her many times over. So, she came back into town on Thursday night. We made plans for Friday night. She just came over and we had an enjoyable time. Well, I will explain "enjoyable" a little more in detail. After 6 years, we finally kissed. I know that is not much to many people, but for us, it was something that I never imagined to happen. And when it happened, there was SO much lying underneath. So many feelings that I never knew she had towards me. Now, my question, after an hour of writing is, is she over her ex-bf? Do you think that she just looking for a good time and not a "relationship"? Irregardless of the answers to these questions, I just want to know how people would act in my situation. I do not want to overthink this "thing" that we have going on because "overthinking" things ALWAYS complicates things. Yet, in the back of my mind, I keep thinking, is this something that could last? And if so, how can I tell if it is going to last? I do not want to approach the subject with her, because I do not want to push her away. I just want to bring her closer to me. Also, when she has to go back to school, where does that leave us, or do I just wait until the time arrives for us to make that decision together? As you can tell, my thought process is a little jumpled. This is simply something that I do not want to screw up because she means so much to me. She is something that has always been close to my heart and I would love to have her closer to my heart, for quite some time. If anyone has any help for my misdirected soul, I would much appreciate your input on my very sad and twisted plotline that some call a story! Thanks for all your time and Happy Holidays to you all!

Currently, I am reading this book entitled "How To Succeed With Women." A friend of mine told me it was a kick. I am about a 100 pages through it, and I can already see some of things that I have been doing wrong with women. My question to everyone is, how do you succeed with women? It is an open-ended question. I am just curious of people's responses, especially women's. Thanks in advance for your help.

About 5 years ago, I met this girl. We dated for about three months. We broke up because I was moving. So, after 5 years, I find myself back where I used to live. And, of course, I still have the same feelings for her. We talked and saw one another over the duration of those 5 years. But, now that I am back, everything feels right with her. The problem is that she has a boyfriend. And what makes it even worse, is that they are in a long-distance relationship. So, me and this girl are the CLOSET of friends. I am like her big brother. Pretty much, I am the one always making sure she is alright and to see if there is anything I can do to make her life just a little bit better. The problem is, it feels like I have a hidden agenda beyond the fact of wanting to be great friends with her. Just so everyone understands, I would literally die for this girl if it meant that she did not have to feel one once of sadness. So, moving forward, she tells me that her boyfriend treats her like crap but that she stays with him because she loves him and because her grandfather loved him. Now, her grandfather passed away a couple months ago and she and grandfather were really tight. I just feel that she is holding on to this relationship for all the wrong reasons. I mean, I love this girl with all my heart, and I truthfully want her to be happy. And when I hear that her boyfriend treats her like crap, well, I feel that must be something I can do. But, in theory, all I can do, is just be here friend. I guess what my question is, should I tell her that I care for her or keep my agenda hidden until such time as she is available again. I truly think that I could treat her better than he ever could. That is something that I can promise. Any help on this issue would be much appreciated. Thanks in advance.