Parky

I'm currently in a second chance... me and my girlfriend split up for 3 months because of the way i was etc. We got back together around 2 weeks ago and it's better than ever! Second chances do happen, and in some cases it makes the relationship even better.

He doesnt sound affectionate enough. You need to sit down and have a serious word otherwise it's only going to make you feel worse and worse as the days go by. Don't stand for it! Just ask him to give you a kiss and a cuddle before you go to bed. Tell him to stop what he's doing otherwise you won't put up for it. I know it's hard to do but you can do it.

I seem to be exactly like your boyfriend - or was like him until my ex girl friend finished me because of what your boyfriend is doing to you. I used to stay up, very late just like your boyfriend playing games, using the internet etc etc. My ex didnt mind at first... but the more i did it, the more i got used to it. In the meantime she got sick of it and tried to have a few words with me and i just ignored it. It got as far as she cried because of it. I look back now and i think why did i do it... i dont do it now. Want to know why i dont do it now? She finished me because of it and a number of other things. I deeply regret it. We were together for nearly 2 years and i lost the love of my life. We are slowly getting back together now after 3 months apart. I wouldnt dream of doing it again! My advice is tell him what you would do if he carried on, tell him you won't stand for it. Trust me it works... it effected me and made me realise. Any questions just ask me.

My ex girlfriend ended it 3 months ago. She immediately started a relationship with one of her work friend (rebound). It took me about a month and a half to finally move on and start dating other girls. I have been on a few dates and meeting new people. I have been going to the gym since the break up and going out with my friend more often. I think i have handled the break up good. In the first week i did the old begging, pleading etc, she had none of it. When i tried to phone her a month after the break up... again she had none of it, wouldnt talk to me. So i started no contact. Last week she phoned me out of the blue and asked to see me... i jumped and went to see her immediately. We got on very well, had a laugh etc. I enjoyed myself despite her being with someone else. So i didnt feel anything. She started sending me emails saying how she enjoys herself with me more than her new bloke and admits her new bloke is just a rebound and not really her type. She goes on to say that he isnt very effectionate... doesnt give her kisses or hugs etc. They live together already and its shocked me, it doesnt really bother me. She started phoning me more often, and everytime she does i keep jumping and going to her, sounds like she has the upper hand at the moment. We went out one night a few days ago... we had sex and had the longest kiss ever, so she has cheated on her new bloke with me, and to be honest i feel down because she keeps giving me mixed signals about her feelings. One minute it will be yes i like you more next minute she starts going on about how much she likes her new bloke. I pay for most things, i take her everywhere and i want to stop but i cant... when she isnt phoning i keep thinking i wont jump when she phones, when she does phone... i jump! i am still seeing new girls and going on dates which my ex knows about but this still doesnt cure my problem. She keeps sending me emails such as " i hate havin no money i need some new clothes but cant afford them! Brad (her new bloke) has always got bills to pay so he cant help me out. hes an ok person hes jus not very affectionate, an thats what i need he never hardly gives me kisses or cuddles an it makes me sad!" "hi thanks for replyin what ever happens between me an you for the moment i want to thank you for bein a very good friend an bein there for me when i need you. thanks for last nite" "well we dont know where this is goin an i meant for the moment we r good friends an i said thanks for bein there 4 me" Really mixed signals that confuse me. Some people say continue being her friend and eventually you may win her back... or avoid her for good for the best option. I still like her, if i stay friends is it possible for a reconcile eventaully or is she just using me? I dont want to keep doing her favours like taking her to university which is a 2 hour drive (she cant drive she has to get the train). The last thing i want to happen is her using me. Any advice or opinions. Thanks!

For background information please read this thread So she hasnt been in contact for a week and half, and i'v decided i'm going to phone her tomorrow. When i first got her number around 2 months ago, i text her the next day and she didnt reply until a week later... saying she had no credit etc. Yes i will phone her tomorrow but i need conversational tips as i'v lost alot of confidence since my break up and i need to gain it back. I will deffinately phone her, i think i will struggle what to say etc. Please can you give me any advice/tips on this matter. Thanks.

Hi there. So i came out of a long term relationship around 2 to 3 months ago, and now i'm back in the game of dating. Since breaking up, my ex ex (the ex before my current ex) has been in contact with me. Oh by the way, the reason the relationship failed with the ex ex is because i wasn't dominant enough, i was more of a clingy and always wanted her to make the moves such as where we go, what we do etc. She has also come out of a long term relationship around the same time as me. Since we both broke up with our ex's we have been in light contact. Anyhow, out of the blue she phoned me up and invited me out for a drink and i accepted, we went to a local club and we got very drunk, it went very well, couldnt have gone any better. I saw her as a friend, i didnt expect anything and i didnt develope any feelings for her. So, two days after this drinking, she called me again asking me to pick her up to get something to eat at a restaurant. Again it went very, very well, lots of laughter etc. At this point i was thinking she is showing some interest. I said to myself i will let her contact me again and make the move again before i make the move so i know for sure she is really showing some interest. Yes, she did indeed phone me up again asking me to take her out again, for a meal and drink at the pub, which again went well, but could have been a bit better, i'd say i let myself down by not being focused enough, i had to say pardon alot because i couldnt quite catch what she was saying. Anyway, she told me she enjoyed it. This happened on monday 6th november. Yesterday, i sent her a text message asking if she wanted to go to the cinema to see a movie... and to my surprise i have yet to receive a reply and it's really got to me because i'v developed some feelings for her again and its bugging me the fact she hasnt got back to me It was only sent yesterday, so really i should give it more time, but usually i get a reply instantly i remember this when i use to be in a relationship with her. Is it possible she doesnt want to see me again or...? How long should i leave it before i contact her again and what method of contact should i use? Call her or text? The only thing i can see if she has no credit to text me back, but surely she can use other methods of contact. Any ideas? Thanks.

Hello there. My friend has invited me to a party. He said there will be alot of girls going. Me and my ex broke up just over a month ago from a 1 and half year relationship and my confidence has dropped dramatically. I want to meet new people and date new people. Yes i have got over my ex. The only problem i have is my shyness and how to approach someone that catches my eye at the party. I wouldnt know what to do. Can anyone give me any tips? Thanks.

Trust me it does get better. My ex broke up with me a month ago, the first two weeks were terrible, and then onwards it just got better, and today i feel like i'v moved on. Get busy, join a gym, get a job, meet people.

I'm going to start NC again, and take it from there. If she comes back she comes back. Any other advice? Thanks.

Me and my ex broke up on the 13th of september, i begged for the first week and then went to strict NC. There was no contact from either of us. 2 weeks later she contacted me via txt msg, to say that she can't stop crying, and how upset she is. So i jumped in my car and drove to hers, to see how she is coping. She was happy to see me and we arranged to see each other 2 days after that. I went back to NC. She txt me again on the day we were meant to see each other, saying how much she has been crying. So i went round to comfort her. We spent all day together, we was happy, until she went to the toilet, and i noticed she left her phone. I checked her phone, only to find out she has been seeing someone else. A friend from her work. I saw some of her sent message to her friends. They said something like "i can't decide who to go with, i want both, but i know i can't have both". She got back from the toilet and i mentioned him, and she burst into tears, and cried on my shoulder. I comforted her, and asked her what she really wants, and she said she wanted me. We was declared back together that afternoon. We was holding hands, our bodies were close together, we couldnt stop kissing, the attraction was there. We went to hers that night, and i mentioned the other guy again. I asked her to tell me the truth of what they both got up to, and she told me he slept over regularly, and had sex once, and gave him the hand job once. I felt i needed to know, because i would have found out anyway, she lives with my sister. On with the same night, we had sex twice, and i stayed over at hers for the night. It was like love again. She said thats the best sex she ever received, and i have to admit, it was. She said this other guy is no good in bed, had a small penis and couldnt feel anything, theres no spark between them two, hes no good at kissing, and she feels he is boring. She just said he is a nice lad, who was nice to her after the break up. Rebound? I asked her why she did all these sexual things with him, and she replied with, "i was thinking of you, i thought it was you". This sounds stupid to me. This guy already has an 11 months old baby, and lives with his sister. He has no car, no future, nothing. He works full time in a cafe (where my now ex works) He doesnt study, and struggles for money. I was thinking to myself, in the long run, it will not work out. While she was seeing this guy, she told me she kept crying in front of him and the guy was like, eh whats up? She told me she was crying because of me, and how she missed me etc. Now the next day after all this happened, i told her i was pulling away, as i didnt feel comfortable, knowing theres another guy involved. She started crying again, saying that she doesnt know what she wants, and that her head is messed up, its in one place, and then in another place. She told me she loves me, and just really likes him, but every time i ask her, she has a different answer. She said she fancies him, but doesnt love him. She said when she started working there 3 years ago, she really fancied him, but he had a girl friend and was engaged etc. (we were together for nearly 2 years). She told me the first week we broke up, she felt like she had moved on, and thought nothing of me. Then the 2nd week came, and she said it really hit her then and made her realise, and thats why she got in touch with me. So, today, we had a long conversation about what to do. She agreed she needed time on her own, to sort her head out. She agreed that she wouldnt see either of me or the other guy (he has the upper hand, he works with her), and that she will need a good few weeks to sort her life and head out. She said its not fair on all of us, and what ever decision she makes, is for the best, thats whether she gets rid of us both, chooses him or me. I really, really want her back. I know it can work, i know it can. I can forgive what she did, and in some ways she regretted doing it. I'v told her i will be waiting, but i wont be waiting forever, and to be prepared that when she decides, iv moved on. She told me she had really seen a change in me, and hopes i stay this way. She told me she thinks about me 24/7, and anything she sees, such as the same car model, where we used to eat regularly, cinema etc all baught me to her mind 24/7. The guy is 19, im 20 and she is 18. My questions are 1) Is this other guy a rebound? 2) Based on what iv said, do you think this rebound could last? 3) What should i do now? Go strict NC, be her friend, or limited contact? 4) If i choose NC, is it likely, two weeks down the line, she will miss me again, just like she has been? 5) Is there any hope? I will wait a month and thats it i will properly move on. Thanks alot.

My ex split up with me. Got a rebound guy. Contacted me 3 weeks later and wanted to see me, crying her eyes out etc. I went to her, and now she doesnt know what she wants. Her head is messed up. Now i regret seeing her and wished i had moved on like i was moving on. Heart broken all over again.

Can you explain what you mean by this? she may just come-a-runnin'

She split up with me 3 weeks ago. I begged for the first week, and then went to NC. She initiated contact 2 weeks later, to tell me she can't stop crying and that she is very upset, and misses me alot. (this was on friday) The same thing happened on sunday, where she was textin me saying she she can't stop crying etc. I went round on sunday, and she was really happy to see me, and i was happy to see her too. We planned to meet each other on tuesday. So tuesday came, we had a fun day out at the circus, i could feel her getting closer and closer to me. She went to the toilet, and i heard her phone go, so i checked it, and it was from another lad, her rebound. I checked her sent messages to her friends saying she doesnt know what to do, i want both of them but i cant have both (me and her rebound). So she got back, after the circus, i had to mention it, so i mentioned it, i said who the hell is this other bloke. I mentioned the fact that she is trying to chose between me and him. She burst out crying and hugged me. A few moments later, we started kissing each other and told me she loved me and wanted me back. So we sat down and i had chat with her and her rebound. She said they had sex once, and he kept sleeping over at her house. (they have been friends for several year). She said they only did things like hand job etc and sex session once. This really, really put a dagger in my heart. Anyways, i went to her house after the circus. We fell asleep and woke up several hours later, and we started to have sex, and i can honestly say, it's the best sex i'v ever received and she said the same. I stayed over at hers that night. Today, i go round, and now shes saying she is confused, doesnt know what she wants. I asked her what her feelings are towards this other guy, and she said she likes him alot, but doesnt love him. I asked her if she loves me and she said yes, lots and wanted to get back with me. I told her i don't want to carry on like this, it's hurting me too much, she started crying again. So i asked her if she could make her mind up, otherwise i'm pulling away from all this crap. I'm going round to see her tonight, and if she's the same im going to have to pull away. I do want to get back with her, i want to give it another go, but not with all this crap happening, it makes me wonder what if this and what if that etc. Has anyone got any advice? Anything i should mention to her?

Take her to play bingo. That is always fun in couples.

Well my ex has her driving test on thursday, and i said she could use my car to practice, and she was like "ahahaha yeah what ever, as if you would let me drive your car" And i was being deadly serious.