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About DoneWithU

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  1. Both my ex-wife and I had and have the same job and made the same money. Financially my kids have everything they need. Why do I need to pay child support? Because some commissioner in a court house tells me I have to? Again, the ex-wife and I have the same job and make the same money. Some years she's made more than I have. I've got 50/50 custody of my children. Should I not be upset when the mother doesn't follow the 50/50? I'm always there to swap the kids on time and with both kids. I've never been late and never not brought the kids. The mother however only swaps when she feels like
  2. I don't know what goes on at my ex-wives house. I don't ask and I don't pry. She's no longer part of my life. AS evil as I think she is, my daughters seem to like her. I don't badmouth her to them, but I do prey that she get hit by a freight train every night... Maybe someday they will see all I tried to do to spend time with them and appreciate it, but there's a good chance they won't, their mother is doing a good job of brain washing them. They'd have had a very different upbringing if their mother hadn't broken up the family. We'd still be in the big house, money would not be an issue,
  3. I've ran out of money for attorneys and grown tired of filing paperwork. I did it non-stop for the first three years, I don't want it to eat up the next 10 years of my life. It takes days to put together a motion, then I spend weeks stewing about it, practicing presenting it, go over all the facts and figures in my head till I'm blue in the face, show up at the courthouse at the required time, then sit and wait 4 hours for the case to be called while sitting with the scum of the earth, watching the pigs coral the defendants to and from the stand. Listen to the ex lie her head off, watch th
  4. I'm three years into it and the sad thing is that I'm becoming alright with it. I've become used to not having my children in my life every day. I've become ok with the fact that someone else controls their lives more than 50% of the time. I've gotten used to bending over and taking it every time the court makes a decision that I don't like. I no longer feel like a father, they no longer feel like my kids, I no longer feel like I have a real family. Before the court got involved I was 100% a regular Dad. I was raised in a traditional "Leave it to Beaver Family" My parents are s
  5. It's not something I sit and dwell on every day. It usually bugs me a few days before court and a few days after. And it bugs me when I drive to the visitation center to get my kids at the scheduled time and she doesnt show up with them. Does that really sound like I'm not over my ex or just worried about court and hoping to spend time with my children when it's scheduled? If she's just show up with the kids on time as ordered by the court I'd have almost no reason to think about her. If she's quit trying to modify custody, I wouldn't have to worry about court outcomes, or preparin
  6. You don't buy that she stole the townhouse? I never said she stole the townhouse, I said she tried to manipulate me so that she could steal it. Luckily for me I was able to keep it. People getting divorced can't legally take money from the other??? Are you serious? You must be one of those people who believe the courts are in business to do the right thing and only make fair decisions. Let me fill you in.... It's all about the money. It's a multi billion dollar industry. Family court does not follow the constitution. I go to a visitation center only to swap the kids, not to have visitation.
  7. I had a terrible divorce 3 years ago. My ex-wife decided the grass was greener and divorced me, tried to steal our two young daughters, took most of the money I had, left me with huge IRS bills, then told me she loved me and wanted to work on our marriage only to try to steal the townhouse that I moved into after our first separation. Since then we've been in and out of court dozens of times. She filed false PFA's (protection from abuse orders) that the court let her pass. We had a shrink spend three days with each of us at our homes and with our kids. The shrink ruled 50/50 custody and said m
  8. I've found my kids to be much more resilient than myself. I don't know what goes on at my ex-wives house. I quit paying attention a year after the divorce. She was dating and screwing every guy she met. I was single for about 4 months and met the woman I've been with for the last three years. We moved in together and did the best we could to blend the families. We go out as a family at least twice a week, we've been on road trips to Michigan, Florida, PA, NJ, MD, ME, CO... etc together. We've taken our family picture in front of the white house, toured the smithsonian, been to cou
  9. I spent a lot of time here a few weeks ago going through the pain of a breakup. I had panic attacks, couldn't sleep, couldn't get the bad feelings out of my head. Wasn't suicidal but had a few suicidal thoughts. To cope I worked out, listen to meditation tapes, dove into my work and hobbies and went on a few random dates. I also went on lexapro. My ex girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me about 3 months ago (I probably deserved it) and quickly started dating another guy (she already had him on the sidelines from some dating app). I did all the things you're not supposed to do, tex
  10. My drinking played a part in ending two relationships. If I've had a few drinks I don't let people tell me what to do, and may even tell them where they can stick it. I too have been passive aggressive, I got tired of being told when I had to go to bed or what I could watch on TV, so I started sleeping on the couch or in the spare room. It didn't matter than the other 80% of our life was pretty good, both of the last ex'es said that I was a jerk.
  11. Great advice, I do have a lot to be thankful for. Good family, a handful of friends, a roof over my head, enough money to pay the basic bills, a few vehicles than run, a cat that pees all over the house, and two young daughters that the courts have allowed me 50/50 custody of. (nice of them to finally allow me 50/50 of my own daughters) Grrrrrr. not happy with family court. Think you own your house and property? Try not paying your taxes. Think your kids are yours? Get divorced and watch the state take over.. America is not the home of the free they taught you about in grade school.
  12. I've been on a number of anti depressant over the last few years and quite honestly I can't tell a difference between being on them or off. I'm currently on Lexipro which does not seem to help with panic attacks at all. I'm still having my share of them. If I knew any dealers I'd try some pot, but I don't, and I don't live in Colorado. I'm about a month and a half into my current breakup and every day is different. Some days are almost unbearable and others are ok. Today was fair. yesterday was alright, the day before I wanted to slit my wrists, we'll see what the rest of the week
  13. I've been dumped for a little over two months and I miss the ex greatly but the thing that goes through my head more often than naught is my ex and her new guyfriend doing all those sexual things we used to do together.. Why are us humans wired to give a hoot about where a few body parts fit together? It kills me to think about, and I try really hard not to, but I wonder how long they dated before they screwed, was it at her house or his, how often they screw, do they do freakier things than what she and I did, is his junk bigger than mine, does he satisfy her more than I could, are the
  14. My ex-wife put me on the antidepressants - before the doctor wrote me the scripts I did not realize I had a problem... I knew I had some type of social anxiety but it had never been diagnosed. I don't know why. Missing? At times nothing. I'm a guy who one year made enough money to rent a 50 foot sailboat in the BVI and invite (pay for) all his friends to come down for ten days. I had the attractive wife, nice house, BMW, nice vacations. What do I want? I can't even answer that. I've been to some of the most beautiful places on the planet alone, and wished I had someone with me who w
  15. My ex was 12 years younger than I was, and physically I was stronger, could hike farther, lift more etc, but I did not have the will to work from dusk till dawn like she did. I don't miss her "Honey Do" lists that went on after 6:00 in the evening. After 5pm or 6pm I just want to relax. She swears around children - I don't miss that. She always wants her way and won't listen to reason - I don't miss that. She used to tell me how to drive - 30 years of driving without an accident - Don't miss that. Has some anger issues and a fiery temper - again I don't miss that I do miss
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