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Mysterious Gurl

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  1. Mysterious Gurl
    Well I know I aren't a lesbian, although I just wondered if my image looked wrong!? Also ... do people grow out of been judgmental?
  2. Mysterious Gurl
    Hey, Erm ... I have a question. Okay ... I am a very ultra paranoid kind of person and I completely have no confidence at all. I am very different from most other 17 year olds. Firstly I don't follow trends. I mean I aren't a goth, punk, chav whatever. I create my own trend and I don't expect people to copy it. I really love my uniqueness, it make makes me feel like an individual and I feel special. (I know that is so corny). Okay, I have wrote posts on this before but I just need some well ... encouragement I guess. I really like football! I watch it, play etc, I don't wear mounds of make-up either!, I aren't one for going to clubs and chatting up boys and flirting and stuff. I am shy when it comes to that. I like beer too. Okay I know thats not a big deal, but I get told I am "manly" because I don't drink ladies drinks like wines and vodka and stuff. (I do sometimes but only on special occasions). I don't really like boy bands .. in fact I think they suck!I love rock music, REM, Green Day etc. Would you say this makes me well .. a lesbian??? I don't have a problem at all with other people being straight/gay lesbian or whatever. In fact I totally respect it. I just want people to see that I am straight. I have to admit, I suppose I am a bit rough and manly but I don't like being all girly and stuff. I don't like pink, I don't fancy boy bands and I don't wear mounds of make-up!! Is this a bad image? I like the way I am and I know and other people know I'm different. I like that, although is it a bad image? Just some people think that I'm a lesbian because I am different. What do you think? Miya xx
  3. Mysterious Gurl
    Your right, it's just so hard. I feel like I have suffered more than anyone out of this and he's getting away with it, then his girlfriend and him can carry on as normal without her being none the wiser of his actions. She thinks the sun shines out of his backside and it makes me sick. I can't believe I even allowed myself in this situation. I know I am just as much to blame as anyone, but I hate that he's getting away with it. I hope he's happy with what he has done. I mean sure I believe in karma, but when does karma happen? I want to be there when it happens. I haven't actually stopped crying in ages. I hate that he made me feel this way. I always knew I couldn't ever have him for the obvious reasons, so why? Why did he make a move? I don't understand myself.
  4. Mysterious Gurl
    I don't know.
  5. Mysterious Gurl
    I want to know why this guy put me in this position when he has absolutely no intention of being with me. Why he took advantage of me when he knows it upset me to core when he talks about his stupid girlfriend who is to blame for literally everything. If she minded her own business none of this would of happened.
  6. Mysterious Gurl
    Yeah - it's because of that guy. Don't worry I am doing NC. It's just so hard.
  7. Mysterious Gurl
    Hey all, Okay - basically I have been so upset and angry over the last 4 or 5 months. Pretty much after my 17th birthday in March I started to get worse. A friend suggested I find "closure" but what is that? How do I get it? Will it prevent me from wanting to kill myself? Why is it people think they can just walk all over me and take me for granted? Sorry - this is like a minor rant and a question bowled in to one. Sorry. Miya xx
  8. Mysterious Gurl
    I do not believe a person can be "in love" with two people at once. I believe they can 'love' a person and be 'in love' with someone else. If your in love with someone, surely your feelings are made for just that person only and no one else. Why do they lie? So they can get what they want. They lie to save themselves in order to get what they want from you. It's a nasty thing to do, but unfortunately it happens. Miya xx
  9. Mysterious Gurl
    Yeah - congratulations!!!! *hugs* Miya xx
  10. Mysterious Gurl
    Erm .. yeah, I'm seeing where you are coming from. I'm 17 and at the moment I'm enjoying having my own space. I feel kind of annoyed being around my parents, even when they aren't doing anything to annoy me. I think it's more a independence thing. Perhaps you could talk to them? I had to chat with my parents just to let them know that everything was okay with me. Miya xx
  11. Mysterious Gurl
    Hey you, Haven't heard from you in a couple of days. Perhaps because you would be a sleep by the time I log on msn . I guess the time zone makes it harder to catch you online. So are you okay then? Have you thought anymore about what you are going to do? I have to say, for a 15 year old your very mature indeed. Much more mature than I ever was at 15, and it wasn't that long ago lol. Since I know more or less what your going through, I would like to help you the best I can. Hopefully I will get to chat to you soon! For now, take care! Miya xx
  12. Mysterious Gurl
    I agree with Avman. I don't think I could write a better post actually. Hope things work out for you. Miya xx
  13. Mysterious Gurl
    Hello! Okay, why are these people making four years look bad? I wouldn't say it was an age gap to be concerned about. Your of legal age so theres no law breaking. Is he respectful to your feelings and does he show you loyalty? Thats what really matters here. I don't think theres anything wrong with it at all. When your 20 he will be 24 and you wont actually recognize an age difference. Go for it, make sure he treats you right and ignore other peoples judgements. It's up to you not them. Miya xx
  14. Mysterious Gurl
    Hey, 21 and 30 isn't that bigger deal. I doubt you'd even notice the age difference. I'm no expert though. I like reading threads about age gaps actually, it makes me feel better about myself knowing theres nothing wrong an age difference in a relationship. You sound like a nice guy though, I hope things work out for you. Miya xx
  15. Mysterious Gurl
    I am here, yes! Our time zones are very different .. I think you are about 6 hours ahead of me though lol.
  16. Mysterious Gurl
    I know sweetie, s'ok (hugs) I'm 17 as you have probably guessed .. I was seeing a man who's 32. He's not married but he has a son and I still love him so much. We don't speak so much anymore but when we do he's always turning on this charm that really makes me feel good and makes me smile. It's just annoying to know that not only can I not have him now, but I can never have him. It makes me cry knowing he's with someone else when he supposedly loves me. I understand you. It's like you love him and hate him. You love him because he makes you feel special (even if he isn't going the right way about it) and hate him because of the situation that he has put you in. It hurts, I know it does. Just be careful hun!
  17. Mysterious Gurl
    Everything you just said ... doesn't that make you hate him? Look you deserve so much better. Go NC! Get away from him. Think of everything he does that hurts you and how much you deserve better. He's not worth it. Your talking to someone here who understands you, and why? Because I was in a similar situation myself.
  18. Mysterious Gurl
    Hi there! Wow, your only 15! Look I'm never one to judge an age gap relationship, but in this case I'm going to make an exception. Your 15, the fact that your questioning a relationship with this man surely means you have doubts yourself. I really do not think it's a good idea to be with this guy. You said yourself he's a pimp (or was) either way he sounds like bad news! How do you know he isn't going to cheat on you IF he was with you? He has a wife and a son. The best thing you can do is to keep away. Believe me, I know it's hard I really do. Your at different places in your life, could you see yourself with him in 5 years time? Please be careful, the fact he's interested in a 15 year old girl also sounds disturbing. Miya xx
  19. Mysterious Gurl
    Hiya, I can understand moving out not being an option, I can also understand your parents. However I'm not siding with them. I think perhaps you shouldn't bring your boyfriend to meet your parents just yet. Give it time for the idea of you dating someone older to settle in. I mean your 19. You will be 20 either this year or next. Your practically out of your teen years now. I think you should just carry on dating and see how it goes, I mean what harm can it do? Although, do whats best for you and it is important to keep your family in mind too. At then end of the day, they just care. As for you, you take care as well. Miya xx
  20. Mysterious Gurl
    I actually wrote lots about this topic when it first happened. I had to ask a mod to remove them though because he found my posts on here. I don't know if he's a member or not, but he wanted me to remove the posts I made when I needed to rant incase someone he knew found them. I don't care now. If someone finds them well it's tough, I have been a member here for a long while. He has a forum that he counts as his home forum, well ENA is my home. He's a friend I met online about a year and a bit ago. We got on really well and I do enjoy making friends online (although I am very careful if I meet people). I decided to meet him because after about a year of chatting to him almost every night I began to trust him. I met him when I went to London with my best mate just after my 17th birthday. Yeah - we was both very attracted to one another. Spent the night texting secretly. Then when I returned home he met me about a week later because I was upset and he wanted to comfort me as a friend. (I thought it would be okay, I don't see a problem with a friend comforting another friend). Anyway, he kissed me while I was hugging him in the car and I didn't stop. Then it carried on for a while until we had a disagreement and I wrote him an e-mail that his SO found. Ever since then it's been lots of confusion and I don't really think he cares about me as much as he says he does. If he did he wouldn't let suffer like this or get verbally abused on forums. I don't understand why he allowed it to carry on when he knew it would never work out. I just don't appreciate being called a nasty piece of work or a malicious little girl. I so wanted to tell his girlfriend everything ... I was sooooooo tempted but I didn't. I wanted to let her suffer just like she helped the process of my suffering. So, sooooo gutted. Miya xx P.s thanks so much for your replies. (((hugs)))
  21. Mysterious Gurl
    I know I thought it too. I just hate that I am being punished because of the way I feel and he gets away with it.
  22. Mysterious Gurl
    Hiya all, Okay erm ... I'm a very sensitive person. I get really upset easily and I often take things personal. I aren't doing it on purpose or to be difficult, it's just who I am. Anyway ... (I know I keep whining about this) but a short while ago, I fell for a guy who I shouldn't of. I'm 17 and he's 32, I'm guessing a lot of you will find that hard to believe and very stupid. It's true though, I did fall in love. He too was in love with me and he kissed me even though he was in a relationship with a child. I don't judge him nor hate him at all. However, his girlfriend found out I had feelings for him when she found this e-mail I sent him in his hotmail account. She doesn't realize he has feelings for me. So after that a massive argument carried on for several weeks between her, me, him and my best friend. (Long story and I can't be bothered to go in to it) Anyway, me and my best friend left this forum we were members of to get away from them both of them and contacted the site owner and asked for our memberships to be cancelled. We explained to her why we wished to leave. My friend said she was having trouble with a couple of members on there. So, about a week later we join another similar forum. Anyway, this guy (who's a moderator from the other site as well as their best friend) joins this forum, opens up a thread and starts verbally abusing both of us! He's never even met us! Calling us both nasty pieces of work and malicious little girls!!! I was kinda shocked seeing it! Apparently, the administrator told the guy I was seeing and the other moderator about my friends pm's. He then got wound up and accusing us both of accusing this woman (Freds girlfriend) of harassing us!! He was so nasty about what he wrote! Saying "How could Fred have feelings for someone like you" (meaning me) "he has a son and a girlfriend he loves dearly!" (my a***) "He just feels sorry for you thats why he can't see what a nasty piece of work you really are!" The worst bit is, he doesn't even realize fred has feelings for me! So I'm getting all this abuse for having feelings for someone and Fred gets off scott free! I'm really hurt and offended! Just wanted to rant. Miya xx
  23. Mysterious Gurl
    Hey, I have always found the best way of getting over a crush is to find a new one. Crushes pass over. Just keep yourself busy and within time you will laugh at your crushes. I know I always have. Take care, Miya xx
  24. Mysterious Gurl
    You probably will not appreciate my post at all, but I will give you my opinion from my experience. I believe cheaters sooner or later eventually get caught. I was seeing a guy who I did fall in love with; and he had (and still has) a girlfriend of about four years with a one year old son. At the time, I felt no guilt because even though it was wrong, it certainly felt right. We just clicked when we met. (I believe we did anyway) we just had an amazing connection between us that temptation finally gave way. Anyway, I had a minor disagreement with him once, and I said I thought it was probably best we never carried on seeing each as 'more than' friends. As the idiot, I regretted my decision almost immediately because I missed the closeness of him. Anyway, I sent him an e-mail late that night and told him I still "loved him". The bad part was, his girlfriend found his hotmail password and saw the e-mail. The outcome was he just told her I had a crush on him to save our skins and she calmed down. Even after she almost blew our cover, we carried on. It's more or less ended now. So yes, I believe cheaters get caught sooner or later. Although, I must admit, I really miss him. I love him so much. Yet nothing can ever happen between us. Miya xx
  25. Mysterious Gurl
    How come you never used protection anyway?
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