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smJackson

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smJackson last won the day on July 13 2020

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About smJackson

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  1. Everything on the site is all screwed up and very difficult to understand. More and more people will get frustrated and stop logging on. I know Kamurj doesnt agree- but this update to the website will leave this place deserted for easier to navigate forums.
  2. This has been one of my favorite forums until this update. I cant see if my favorites even log in anymore, and I dont want to come to this forum and they dont even log in anymore. This new website is also very complicated to understand and I consider myself very tech savvy. I suppose I will try to find a forum that's easier to navigate and understand the layout. Take care!!
  3. This is exactly why you never go back to an ex. Once the relationship has officially ended, you should never trust them again if they try to come back. Theres a motive, and not a good one. Most exes dont come back to us because they finally realize our worth. Some come back only to hurt us some more. Or to settle a score, especially if you left them first. So they want revenge. They also come back to use us for sex, attention, praise and adulation, or for validation that they are still loved after their new conquests didnt work out. A man that truly loves you will never let you go. If he do
  4. Stick to no contact. It is selfish of her to want you to keep loving her, while telling you that there is no chance for the relationship to ever work. She cannot have it both ways. That is selfish and you deserve to be loved and valued just the same as she does. She doesnt want you to stop loving her because she wants to keep that door open to your heart in the event that her other relationships fail and she needs a soft place to fall. As hard as it is, please avoid contact with her as much as possible. You will get through this.
  5. No do not make any more contact with this guy. You are doing all of the initiating- which tells me he is just not that into you. He will respond back, but makes no effort toward you at all. And you deserve a man that will make an effort to be in your life. Men will pursue you if they are interested. They will make sure you know. They will call you, make plans to see you, etc. He is not doing any of that. Leave this guy alone for good. If he can go weeks and months without talking to you, he is not the guy for you.
  6. You took the right steps in blocking her and going no contact. She is using you as a backup plan. You are familiar and you provide attention and validation when she cant get it elsewhere. It would take too much effort and time for her to find a new attention source. And yes, she will ghost you as soon as the new guy shows her some attention. Block her out of your life for good. She will never come back to you and want an exclusive relationship because she likes the new guy more. That should be all the information you need to stay away from her. Never settle for being second because you never g
  7. Exes breadcrumb because you allow it. The only thing that manipulators understand is ACTION. It doesnt matter how you ACT, you are still engaging her by remaining available to her. Yes, she uses you for attention, validation and as a plan B. You went from the main source to a backup source. Breadcrumbing and using you along with her current bf shows a huge lack of respect for the both of you. Shes using you guys. Take your attention away from her and see how quickly she disappears from your life without a fight. She does not love you. She isnt even emotionally available to you because her
  8. I feel so bad for what you are going through. This may sting a little bit, but please hear me out. The fact that you JUST met this man and you guys have been "together" for two months- makes me believe that he may have been rebounding with you. Jumping head first into a new relationship after a 5 year abusive relationship means that he could possibly be seeking an escape from loneliness and the void that comes with a breakup. I'm not taking anything away from what you shared with him. It just sounds like as soon as his ex noticed that he was moving on in his life, she notices and comes
  9. I believe that he cares about you. He thinks highly of you, but something was lacking in the relationship. It could be attraction or chemistry, or some other element that he hasnt disclosed to you. Whatever it is, its strong enough that he left and took a chance on losing you forever. He joined dating apps so that he could see "what else is out there." So I dont believe he was confused or unsure about you. He wants to keep his options open. I know it hurts and it doesnt make any sense. You may never understand why, or get closure. Leave this guy alone and allow yourself time to process
  10. Just give this incident a little time to blow over. You extended an "olive branch" by letting him know that he can reach back out to you if he wanted to. Your feelings are hurt because he chose not to do so. And that is okay. Yes you butt dialed him, it is what it is. You feel rejected all over again since he chose not to make contact. This too shall pass. Something good did come out of this. At least now you know where you stand with him. He has moved on. So just get back to living your life as you did before you butt dialed him.
  11. I know you saw me the other night when I was dropping my ex husband off. I know you saw us because you slowed all the way down to like 40 mph, so as to not catch up to us. It ticked me because for one, I wasnt even driving my car and you clearly recognized me from having the light on inside that car. Second, the more I slowed down, the more you slowed down. You gave me a reaction that I wasnt even trying to get. Because believe me, you could pull up beside me with a woman in your car and it wouldn't affect me one way or another. I'm not speeding up, slowing down, trying to get your attenti
  12. Yes, when an ex appears with someone new soon after the breakup, 9 times out of 10 they were already around when they were still with you. She is a deceitful, disloyal woman- continue to process the breakup and see her for what she really is. Feel the anger, sadness and range of emotions. You are now well on your way to healing. Once you get through the stage of acceptance- 1)that she is who she is. 2) that she will never change or feel bad for what she put you through, and 3)that she just isnt the right person for you-- it's smooth sailing from there. It wont always hurt as bad as it
  13. I am so sorry that you are going through such heartbreak, humiliation and despair. Your ex gf slept with you last week to keep you hooked on her and to maintain control. She does NOT love you or the new guy she is with either. This is all a game to her, and she uses sex to keep you attached. She knows that her sex is good, and she uses it as a controlling tool. If she is sleeping with both of you in such a close proximity, then she is triangulating the two of you, perhaps to spark a competition between you guys. She is a drama queen who thrives on excitement and you need to cut her off com
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